As she and Lilly leaned over, watching the mama dog and her litter of six, Jake stepped into the barn.
“What do we have here?” He sidled next to her and groaned when he saw the dog and puppies. “A stray?”
“No, she’s not a stray. She either belongs to someone or she’s mine. She’s not a stray.”
He cleared his throat. “She’s a mutt.”
“Jake, I don’t have to ask your permission to get a dog.” She wouldn’t argue with him. Not in front of Lilly.
She wanted to tell her brother that what she did was no longer his business. He didn’t get to make decisions about her life, her career, who she dated. Not that she had dated since she’d come home. But he definitely got no say in what animals she brought home. He’d made decisions for her when she was younger and hadn’t asked her opinion. No more.
“You’re right. You don’t,” he said just as quietly. “I just wanted to let you know, Breezy isn’t feeling too great. The baby is fussy. I think they’re both going to need a trip to the doctor.”
“I can watch the twins for you,” she was quick to offer.
“Marty has them, but if she needs a break, can she call you?”
“You know she can.”
Lilly glanced at Jake, then at Sam. “Do I need to leave so you two can argue?”
Sam laughed a little and Jake looked uncomfortable.
“You stay put, kiddo. Aunt Sam and I will step outside.”
Brothers. She gave Lilly a quick wink and the girl shook her head, as if she got it. Because even though she didn’t have brothers, she had Duke for a dad.
“Back in a minute, Lilly,” she assured her niece.
“If you need me to rescue you, the code word is help.”
Sam laughed. “I’ll remember that.”
Jake was waiting for her outside. They walked to the fence, neither saying a word. Sam leaned her arms across the top rail and watched her new gelding, a pretty palomino, as he trotted across the field, his buttery gold coat soaking up the sunshine. Standing next to Jake, she felt small. And young. She exhaled her frustration, but he didn’t react.
“Nice horse,” Jake commented.
“What do you want, Jake?”
“I ran across Remington. He was at the feed store.”
“Yeah, he lives here now.”
He cleared his throat. “So you know he’s in town?”
“Yes, I know.” She could have said more, but she didn’t want to make this easy for him. She didn’t want to let him off the hook. Her brothers had hurt her. They’d meant to protect her, to make things right. But they’d hurt her along the way.
It still ached. Not the way it had before, but from time to time it would sneak up on her. She closed her eyes tight for a moment, long enough to fight back the tears.
Jake touched her back. “I’m sorry, Sam. I don’t know what else to say. We were young. We were doing the best we could. And we didn’t know how to raise a younger sister.”
“I know. So why did you feel the need to tell me you saw Remington?”
“I didn’t want you to be surprised.”
“Oh, I was surprised. He showed up at the hospital with a crew of cowboys who minister to kids.”
“Ah.”
He said it as though he understood. She doubted he did. He hadn’t lived with Aunt Mavis. He hadn’t lived through the Bible lessons, the lectures and the condemnation.
She’d always thought her aunt well-meaning. She’d given the older woman the benefit of the doubt. That didn’t ease the pain.
“I should go. Lilly is in there with the dog and she wants me to help her with her horse.”
Before she could step away, Jake stopped her, his hand on her arm. “Sam, we’re all glad you’re home. We want you here. But we want more than that. We want you in our lives.”
She nodded but her throat was tight and tears burned her eyes. “I know. I don’t go to work until three. I can watch the twins if you need me to.”
The twins. Rosie and Violet. They were the daughters of Jake’s twin, Elizabeth. She and her husband had died in a plane crash, devastating the family all over again. They’d had too much devastation in their past. A mother who had walked away. A father who drank himself to death. Then Elizabeth’s death.
But they were making up for those hard times. Jake had found Breezy, the sister of Elizabeth’s husband, Lawton. Duke and Oregon had found each other. Brody had Grace.
They all had someone. Except her.
Sam shook off the melancholy. She had her family. And that was good.
She was saved from darker thoughts when Lilly ran out of the barn, a big grin on her face. “Nine. There are nine puppies!”
“I should go home and leave the two of you to your labor and delivery.” Jake leaned to kiss Sam’s cheek. “Let me know if you need anything.”
“Will do.” She glanced away, hoping he didn’t see the truth. She needed him. She needed all of her brothers.
“Sam, I hope you’ll forgive us.”
She stopped, unsure of how to process that request. She was forced to look at Jake, to see the tenderness in his expression. She nodded, brushing hair back from her face as the wind kicked up. She started to tell him there was nothing to forgive, but it didn’t seem honest. She’d been angry with them. She loved her brothers, but they’d hurt her.
“I’m working on it,” she said. It was a candid answer and he seemed to accept it.
“Good. That’s all we ask.”
When he left, she headed for the barn and Lilly. What she needed was an hour or two on horseback to clear her mind.
* * *
Remington had spent his morning with a family that had lost a father during the night. It hadn’t been easy, watching them say goodbye to a man they’d expected to be in their lives for years to come. As much as he loved ministry, he was still adjusting to this part of the job. Standing in front of a crowd on a Sunday morning was easy compared to sitting one-on-one with a wife, telling her God would help her through the coming days, weeks and months.
He slowed as he drove past the Martin’s Crossing Saddle Club. He recognized the truck with the horse trailer hooked to it, and the woman sitting on the showy palomino. Good old common sense told him to keep driving. He sure didn’t need distractions in the form of Samantha Martin. He didn’t need to get caught up in the past when he had the present to concern himself with.
Good advice, but he couldn’t quite make himself listen. The past six hours had drained him. Seeing Sam, even from a distance, shifted things.
He hit his brakes at the first road and headed back in the direction of the rodeo grounds. He spent the next few minutes telling himself all the reasons he should let it go. Let her go.
He still took the road that led to the saddle club. Because the girl he’d known ten years ago was buried inside the composed shell of the woman he’d met yesterday. The wild teenager who’d grabbed hold of every adventure, who could race him across the field and never stop laughing as she beat him, she was in there somewhere.
Didn’t anyone else realize that the real Samantha Martin was missing, replaced by this stranger?
He parked, got out of his truck and headed toward the arena. Sam stood