Do not be charmed. Stop now. “All I saw was an addition to my herd instead of a loss.”
“Do you have many losses?”
“We used to have more until we started calving later in the season.”
“It seems to me that you’d want to have them later. When it’s warm.”
Allie smiled a little. “Not if you’re selling them. You want them to have as much growing time as possible before they go to market, which is why most ranchers calve in February. March at the latest. We’re missing out in some ways by calving in April and May, but making up for it in others.”
Jason frowned at her. “It’s got to be nerve-racking, going to work and wondering if your cows might need a midwife.”
“That’s just how it is for a part-time rancher.”
“Do you think you’ll ever become a full-time rancher?”
“No. As soon as one of my sisters comes home, I’ll move elsewhere.”
“Out of the Eagle Valley?”
“Maybe. But definitely off the ranch.”
“You don’t like it here?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“No,” he agreed. “You didn’t.”
But her tone and her body language had. After reminding herself that she didn’t need to protect herself from Jason, that he wasn’t the enemy, she said, “The ranch and I... We have our differences.”
Jason took another slow sip of coffee and when Allie didn’t expand on her answer, he said, “My dad and I have our differences. I guess it happens to everyone.”
Allie smiled in acknowledgment, glad for the shift of subject. She was the only Brody sister who had issues with the ranch, but she was also the only sister to suffer tragedy there twice. One quick and devastating and the other slow and torturous.
“That’s life. So...how has the Eagle Valley changed since you left?”
“I have been back a time or two.” He smiled ruefully. “But not that many. Mostly I was training or playing.” He stopped, as if analyzing his past, then his clear aqua gaze met hers. “A lot has changed. For one thing I miss the old movie theater. That new thing at the edge of town is ugly.”
“Yes. I guess it was going to take too much money to bring the old theater up to code, so they shut it down.” Allie had also loved the historic brick theater with the balcony and classic early-twentieth-century woodwork. “You’re right. The new one isn’t the same.”
They finished their coffee while discussing the safe topic of local changes, and Allie told herself more than once that since she wasn’t all that fascinated by hands, she could stop studying Jason’s—but it was better than looking at his face as they spoke and finding herself thinking that he was simply too damned good-looking for words.
Finally Allie pushed back her chair and started tidying up the table, carrying the coffee cups to the counter. “I need to get going,” she said on an apologetic note. “I have to visit someone in the hospital.”
“And I need to get to work.” He started for the door, then stopped. “Do you have many more pregnant cows?”
“Fourteen.”
“You know that you can call me anytime you need help.”
“Thank you.” She smiled politely at him. What else could she do?
After Jason had gone, Allie finished wiping the table, then rinsed the cups. She did everything she could to keep from slowing down long enough to acknowledge that being around him shook her. She wasn’t supposed to be thinking about guys. She was recovering from a guy. She needed to be thinking about making a future and not letting the ranch disintegrate while she was in command, as it tended to do.
After the kitchen was back in order, she grabbed her purse and went out to her car. She was going to see Kyle—and not because she felt guilty not doing it.
As she drove to the hospital, she told herself that this was a good thing to do. A way to prove to herself that she was done with that chapter of her life. Because she really had to move on past this bitterness. It was going on two years and she still felt anger toward the man—both for the promises he hadn’t kept and for the crappy things he’d done after the divorce.
Kyle, as it turned out, looked terrible. Two black eyes, a swollen lip, but no stitches that she could see. His other injuries, whatever they might be—bruised and broken ribs and sprains, according to Ray—were hidden by the sheet covering him.
Allie took a few steps into the room, hating the smell, hating the circumstances that had her there. Hating that she’d come. And what did she say now that he’d focused on her? “How’re you feeling?” wasn’t appropriate.
“I’m glad you’re okay. I mean, other than...” She gestured weakly.
“Yeah.” He spoke softly, his words slightly slurred.
Allie moved forward, but still kept her distance from the bed. She wished him no harm, but he had been so adversarial toward her and her sisters after he’d failed to get part of the Lightning Creek, that she was also having a hard time feeling anything other than regret that he’d been hurt. Seeing him like this did not stir any feelings of warmth or desire for a reunion. Was that why he’d wanted to see her? To rekindle something?
If so, injured or not, he was in for a rude awakening. Allie wasn’t about to complicate her life now that she was on the road to straightening it out.
“I just wanted to stop by, let you know I was thinking about you.”
“Appreciate that.”
And then there wasn’t a whole lot to say. “Well, I don’t want to wear you out. I wish you a speedy recovery.”
“Allie?”
“Yes?”
“I’m going to have trouble covering my part of the medical bills because I’m between jobs.”
Allie’s heart dropped. He’d wanted to see her to shake her down?
“I’m sorry to hear that, Kyle.” She made a backward step toward the door. “I’m sure you know that I don’t have any money with all of my student loans. Maybe your dad could help you out.”
“Yeah. Uh, he’s not in a position to do that.”
And she was? Honest to Pete.
“Sorry. I’m sure the hospital will take payments.”
“I’ll need therapy afterward.”
Allie’s patience was about to snap. “What do you want, Kyle?”
“It’s what I don’t want. I don’t want to file medical bankruptcy.” His gaze held hers and she searched, trying to find a hint of the guy she’d fallen in love with. Had time changed him so much? Or had she fallen in love with an illusion?
“And...”
“Would you co-sign a loan for me?”
“I’m up to my neck in student loans!”
“If you used that eighty-acre parcel on the far side of the creek as collateral... Not that you’d need collateral. I have some savings to use to make payments until I land a job.”
“Oooh, no...” Allie shook her head. “Uh-uh. I’m not attaching the ranch to a loan.” She’d taken great pains not to do that while funding her education.
“Only part of—”
“No.” At any minute she expected Kyle’s heart-rate monitor to top out. If she’d been attached to a monitor, it would already be there.