‘Just laying down the ground rules. Either you’re going to engage with this or you’re not.’
‘Just give me one good reason why I should.’
She laughed softly. ‘I can give you two—and if you want to be part of their lives you’ll do this. Because I’m not subjecting them to an absentee father who can’t keep his family commitments and doesn’t know the difference between work and home.’
He stared at her searchingly for the longest moment, then, just when she thought he’d refuse, he nodded.
‘OK. I’ll call Andrea in the morning and set it up. And you can have your two weeks. But make no mistake, I’m doing this for the children, because you’re right—they deserve more than an absentee father. But it’s going to take a long while before I can forgive you for cheating me of their first months, and for keeping something so monumentally important from me. So don’t expect me to be all sweetness and light, because I’m still so angry with you I can’t even find the words for it.’
Her eyes filled, and she swallowed the tears. ‘I know. And I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but, for what it’s worth, I still love you.’
‘You still love me? You can stand there and say that, and yet you walked out and didn’t come back?’ he said incredulously.
‘Because it was killing me,’ she told him unevenly. ‘And I couldn’t remember who we were. But I do still love you. That’s never been in doubt.’
‘Then come back to me.’
‘No. Not just like that. It’s not enough, not on its own. There has to be more. And I want to know if we’ve got anything left, when our old life’s stripped away and all we’ve got to fall back on is each other. I think we could both be in for a shock.’
‘ANDREA, it’s—’
‘Max! Are you all right?’
He blinked, a little startled by her concern. ‘Fine,’ he lied. ‘I’m fine. Look, I need you to do something for me.’
‘Of course,’ she agreed, but then, before she let him move on, she added, ‘Max, how are things?’
Bizarre. Confusing. ‘I’m not sure,’ he said honestly. ‘I need time to find out. Can you clear my diary for the next two weeks?’
‘I’ve done it,’ she said, surprising him yet again. ‘Well, I’ve shuffled what I can, and cleared most of it. I’m still waiting for Yashimoto to come back to me.’
Damn. He’d forgotten about Yashimoto. He was supposed to have been going on to Tokyo from New York to firm up the new contract.
‘Maybe—’
‘Max, I’ll get him. It’s not a problem. He can deal with Stephen—’
‘No. Stephen doesn’t know all the ins and outs. Get them both to call me—’
‘Ma-ax?’
The warning voice from behind him made him turn, to find Jules propped up against the door frame cradling a cup of tea in her hands, one foot rested on the other, her bare toes looking curiously vulnerable. Not so her face. She was staring at him unflinchingly, and her expression was uncompromising. ‘No phone calls,’ she reminded him, a thread of steel that he’d forgotten about in her voice, and he gave a low groan of frustration and turned his back on her.
‘OK. Scratch that, deal with him yourself, let Stephen handle it. I need to—Well, there are…’
‘Rules?’ Andrea said softly, and he sighed.
‘Two weeks, no business, no distractions.’
‘Well, hallelujah! I think I’m going to like your wife. I just hope I get the chance to meet her. Don’t blow it, Max.’
Lord, what had happened to her? She was supposed to be on his side! ‘I’ll do my best,’ he muttered. ‘Look, I know it’s against the rules, but if there really is a problem…’
‘If there really is a problem I will, of course, ring you. Give me your wife’s number.’
‘What?’
‘You heard. I’ll call her.’
‘You don’t need to trouble her.’
‘No, I don’t suppose I do, but I’ll give her the veto.’
He said something rude, then apologised and handed the phone to Julia. ‘She wants your number—for emergencies.’
‘Right,’ she said, and took the phone out of his hand and walked off with it, shutting the door behind her with her foot.
He swore again, scrubbed his hand through his hair and then heard a cry from the babies’ room.
His daughters. That was what this was all about, he reminded himself, and, padding across the landing in bare feet, he went in there and lifted the one who was awake out of her cot and smiled at her.
Ava? He wasn’t sure, so he said, ‘Are you Ava?’ out loud, and she turned her head and looked at the other cot.
‘Libby?’
She turned back and beamed, reaching up and pulling his ear. Oh, well, it gave his nose a break. He shifted her slightly so she couldn’t reach, and then sniffed. Hmm. She had a problem that was mercifully outside his experience, but that was fine. Jules wouldn’t be long.
Would she?
‘Max?’
‘I’m in here,’ he said, coming out of the babies’ room with Libby in his arms. ‘Are you happy now?’
‘Mmm. She sounds nice. I’ve given her my number and my other contact details, just in case.’
‘In case what? The office catches fire?’
‘That would be pointless. What are you going to do, spit on it? Did you wake Libby?’
‘No, she was awake. She—um—needs you.’
She chuckled and took the baby, kissing her and nuzzling her nose against her neck. ‘Hello, monster. Is Daddy chicken?’
She started to cluck and squawk, and Libby thought it was hilarious and got the giggles, and she looked at Max over her head and saw his glower crumble and fade under the influence of Libby’s delicious chuckles.
‘Of course, part of the bonding process is learning about nappies,’ she told him deadpan, and she could have sworn his colour drained a fraction. ‘It’s OK, I’ll let you practise on a harmless one,’ she said with a grin, and nearly laughed out loud when his shoulders dropped in relief.
He propped himself up in the doorway and watched her from a safe distance as she dealt with Libby, then she put the little girl back in his arms and washed her hands. Then she lifted Ava out and cuddled her while she found a clean nappy and got it ready, then changed her, too, and dropped the nappy in the bucket.
‘Are those cloth nappies?’ he asked, peering a little closer now it was safe.
She turned her head and raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Don’t look so shocked.’
‘I—I’m not. I’m just surprised. I would have thought—I don’t know; all that washing. You could just chuck disposables.’
‘Mmm. Eight million a day, going into landfill.’
‘Eight million? Good grief!’
‘Mmm. Just in this country. And they don’t biodegrade, either, so they’re there for