Kate said, ‘I doubt it. She’s got a lot of protection surrounding her in there. Unless you landed belly first?’
‘No.’ One thing she’d done right. Twisting to land on her hip and shoulder had hurt her but protected her daughter.
The curtain opened to admit an orderly. ‘One Doppler as required.’
‘Right, let’s get started.’ Kate took the instrument and nodded to the orderly to leave.
Kick.
Sophie gasped. ‘Oh. Ow! Do that again.’
Kate looked surprised. ‘I haven’t done anything yet.’
Kick.
Sophie spread her hands over her extended stomach. ‘Cooper, put your hand there. She’s alive and kicking harder than ever.’
His large hand slid under one of hers, and his eyes filled with relief and wonder. ‘Go, girl.’ His voice cracked and he stopped talking.
‘Me? Or baby?’ she teased through the tears now clogging her throat.
‘I’ll check baby’s heart before giving you two a few minutes alone.’ Kate smiled and said moments later, ‘Listen to that. Nothing wrong with that heartbeat. Be back shortly for a full examination.’ Putting the Doppler aside, she slipped out and closed the curtains tight behind her.
Cooper’s hand splayed across Sophie’s stomach was so large, and strong, yet gentle. So right. Like he was laying a claim on her.
What?
The question screamed into her head. It was not right. Cooper didn’t have a place in her life, only that of her daughter’s. But she couldn’t push him away, liked the strength and warmth of his hand. Needed him at her side for now. Had needed him ever since she’d thought something was wrong with their baby. All her strength and determination to do everything properly had gone, leaving her like a jelly on the inside. But having Cooper at her side settled her jitters a little at least.
Reaching around his arm, she placed her hand over his. ‘She’s a busy girl in there. I’m never going to tell her to take a rest again.’
‘You probably woke her up from a lovely sleep when you dived to the ground and now she’s paying you back.’ His smile was lopsided, filled with concern as he stared at her baby bump.
That concern would be for the baby, she acknowledged to herself. Not her. He had no reason to be worried about her. Apart from her crazy reaction to a car going past, that was. She wasn’t important to him, wasn’t the love of his life. Her shoulders slumped. If only they were in love and expecting their first child, together on all fronts. Not dodging around each other, trying to get along without too many arguments.
Thinking like that was dumb. She didn’t love Cooper—never had, probably never would. Any feelings like that would be due to baby brain. Besides, it wouldn’t work if she did. He wasn’t going to fall in love with her, and a one-way relationship was as bad as her parents’ hateful one.
‘Right.’ Cooper straightened up, stepped away from the bed. ‘Let’s get you sorted and then we can go home. You look whacked.’
Thanks for the compliment.
She snatched her shirt down over baby and growled, ‘Tell Kate I’m ready.’
And stay out there so I don’t have to see you get all excited when we get to hear baby’s heartbeat again.
But she knew she could never do that. So much for keeping Cooper on the other side of the door every time she went to see the midwife. After this he was involved, and it would be petty to tell him otherwise.
Horror struck her. Did that mean he’d be there during the birth? She so wasn’t ready for that.
‘Let’s go home,’ Cooper said thirty minutes later.
Home. Yes. She needed that—somewhere to relax, unwind, forget the fears that had blitzed her today. ‘Let’s,’ she agreed.
Then she stumbled. Home? With Cooper? No. She was going back to his house for a few days until she had her apartment fixed up. That would be home. Not Cooper’s place.
‘You okay?’ he asked warily.
‘Yes,’ she snapped.
‘I’ll drop you off and head into the hospital. I need to touch base with the unit before I start.’
‘I’ll get a taxi.’ When his eyebrows rose and his mouth tightened she added, ‘I’ll visit Mum and Dad.’ Ask for a room.
‘No, Sophie, You need to rest and put today’s scare behind you, not go getting uptight about your parents.’
He was right. Of course. One more night at his house couldn’t hurt. Could it?
COOPER STRODE DOWN the corridor towards the surgical unit, relieved to have left Sophie at home.
As long as she stayed there. Though he doubted she was in any hurry to see her parents. What really was going on in that family? The less Sophie told him about herself the more he wanted to know.
Talk about getting under his skin. He needed to put space between them. Needed to get back on track with being a support person for the mother of his child, no more, no less. Needed to remember he didn’t do relationships of the close and personal kind, and to do so would be to the detriment of Sophie and the baby. And him.
What was he afraid of? That he’d take them in then send them packing when they got too close, and demanded more of him than he had to give? Turn Sophie into one of those women Dad had coming and going? She couldn’t get close if he kept the barriers up. Couldn’t hurt him if he didn’t allow her in.
Under your skin already, remember?
Then there was the baby. A whole other story. He’d never walk away from his daughter. Which meant he’d never walk away from Sophie. He wouldn’t feel incapable of looking after them and opt out for ever, as his mother had. The only thing he was incapable of was loving Sophie. Oh, and making up his mind about how far to press her to stay under his roof where he could do a better job of looking out for them.
When she’d dropped to the ground earlier his heart had stopped. Throw in her fears about the baby not moving and he’d come up with a dreadful scenario. Stroke or, worse, a fatal heart attack. His hands had been shaking as he’d touched her, reached to find a pulse. Even when he’d felt the steady thump, thump of blood pounding through her body it’d taken minutes for his panic to back off. He didn’t want to lose Sophie. Not now. Not ever.
He wasn’t making a lot of sense with this. Who would in the circumstances? If only Sophie would get out of his head, give him quiet time when he wasn’t actually with her. But no. She was in there, tap-tapping away at his resolve to remain uninvolved, making him resent her for getting him in a lather over everything. She was forcing him to face up to his mother’s suicide and how he hadn’t forgiven her for deserting him.
If his mum had got help for her obsessive, compulsive excessive disorder his life would’ve been so different. All their lives would’ve been different. He might even be able to fall in love without thinking up a hundred reasons why that was bad for him and the other person involved.
Cooper stopped to stare out a window onto the motorway below. What if he stopped fighting this? Gave up and took things as they occurred? Dealt with imagined shootings and lack of kicks systematically? Helped Sophie move into that grot box of an apartment instead of trying to talk her out of it? Surely then he’d get past these feelings of need, of wanting to spend more time with her. Emotions that came from his desire to do the right thing, nothing else.
Get it? Nothing else.
‘Cooper?