AJ had opened up, stunning him with that little truth from her past.
She’d been planning to stay. How could he have not seen that? But he’d been blind to anything but his own problems and gotten in first, shot her down, and she’d left.
He rubbed the bridge of his nose and scowled.
Now here they were again, treading familiar ground, coming together and getting lost in that crazy desire just like before. No, not like before. His eyes darted to her bright red hair, the gentle curve of her cheek. He knew what he wanted now. And AJ...well, she wanted something, too. And apparently that didn’t include him.
He’d felt her withdrawal this morning, the way she didn’t meet his eyes, the subtle wall she put between them. He’d reassured her that their lovemaking hadn’t stuffed anything up but wasn’t entirely sure she believed him.
He cast his mind back to the previous night, and suddenly everything flooded in: AJ writhing beneath him, calling his name as he drove deep inside, loving her until they finally collapsed, sated and spent. And later, in bed, she’d driven him crazy with her hands and body, her shock of hair as it teased his sensitive nipples, brushed over his belly, then lower when she took him in her mouth with bold delight.
Damn. He shifted in his seat, trying to relieve the sudden tightness in his groin. Despite that incredible chemistry, he still had no idea what was going on in her head. Oh, she’d let down her guard a little, allowing a brief glimpse inside, but it still wounded him, the way she’d so grudgingly shared that snippet.
Yeah, and you’re an open book, right?
AJ glanced up then, meeting his eyes, and he realized he’d been staring.
She blinked, her bright eyes assessing, searching, a hesitant smile hovering on her lips. That tiny uncertainty—from a woman so very sure of everything else in her life—tore at his heart.
He’d put that uncertainty there and he had a lot to make up for. So he held her gaze and put everything he had into his smile, every remembered kiss, every touch, every breath they’d shared.
Her eyes widened...and then there it was, the lush curve of her mouth, the seductive crease of her cat’s eyes before she ducked her head and returned to her book.
There was his Angel.
And just like that, he fell. Totally, completely.
He loved her. Loved everything about her—all those doubts, all those tiny scars on her heart, her fractured past that had shaped her into the strong, independent woman she was now.
But would it be enough? Would he be enough?
There was only one way to find out. He had to keep going forward.
* * *
AJ refused to let disappointment show when Matt dropped her off at Zac’s apartment. Instead, she pasted on a smile and accepted his kiss on the cheek.
“I have to go to work,” he murmured, his lips lingering, giving her goose bumps. “I have a meeting tonight.”
“On a Sunday?”
“Conference call. I’ll call you, okay?”
“Sure.”
She watched him go, her gaze drinking in his long stride, the way the expensive suit sat on his lean frame, the shaggy hairline that brushed his collar.
She whirled to the elevator, forcing back inexplicable tears. Lust had never gripped her so surely before, trapping her in tight claws until he was all she could think about.
She furiously pressed the up button over and over, determined to ignore the way her breath hitched. And what of last night? How would that affect her chances of getting pregnant? Surely it had consequences, despite his reassurances.
The elevator doors slid open and she strode in, dumping her bag on the floor before digging out her phone and dialing Dr. Adams’s number.
As much as she wanted Matt, burned for him like a bushfire had taken up residence under her skin, she couldn’t jeopardize her chances. She had to know the facts. And if that meant complete abstinence, then so be it.
Ten minutes later, after Dr. Adams had eased her mind, she ran a bath, cranked up her iPod and turned her attention to the novel she’d been trying to read since the flight. But she only managed a few pages before restlessness got the better of her.
“Damn you, Matthew Cooper,” she muttered, rising from the water and grabbing a towel. After making herself a cup of tea, she pulled out her sketch pad and pencils and began to work.
It was the night of the hospital benefit and AJ was, quite frankly, scared.
Matt’s compliments had briefly warmed her—she’d chosen a red below-the-knee ruffled dress with a tight corset bodice—but trepidation had set in as they drove to the Pullman Quay Grand at Sydney Harbour.
If Matt noticed, he didn’t say anything. They parked, then made their way into the fancy foyer, all massive windows and panoramic views of the harbor. AJ barely had time to take it all in before he was guiding her toward the restaurant where a bunch of perfectly dressed people were milling about.
This was it. She was actually doing this. With a deep breath, she straightened, pulling her shoulders back.
“You okay?”
She glanced up at him, at the concern creasing his brow. “Yes, I just...” She paused then said carefully, “I don’t like crowds.”
“Really?”
“They make me nervous, all those people watching,” she lied. Truth was, she’d been assessed, dissected and judged before and it had stopped worrying her a long time ago. No, it was the parent thing that freaked her out. She didn’t do parents. They made her nervous.
He eyed the packed gathering inside the restaurant, wall-to-wall people in their designer dresses and suits, the loud murmur of voices, clinking glasses and occasional laughter spilling out, then he turned to her with a reassuring smile.
“Honestly, I don’t think they’ll notice us.”
“Matthew! You’re late!”
A woman emerged from the crowd and made her way toward them. She was tall, regal and flawlessly done up in a black shift dress and kitten heels. The family resemblance was obvious.
AJ swallowed as she watched Matt’s mother kiss his cheek, then slowly turn to her.
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