Outside the cockpit, the world blurred and his heart quickened in wild anticipation as the plane sped faster and faster until the nose lifted into the twilight and everything around them fell away.
He broke out in a light sweat, exhilarated by the rush that fueled what some considered a crazy hobby. Being up in the air was one of his favorite places to be. With Natalie at his side, it felt more right than ever before.
When it was safe to do so, he glanced over at her. Eyes tightly shut, her hands gripped the armrests, the crescent of her breasts hidden under her lace-trimmed tunic. He pressed his lips together. Something deeper and more potent than simple concern washed over him.
For a moment he imagined her eyes were shut due to overwhelming pleasure, not fear. The urgent feel of her hands anchored to him as his tongue traveled across the silk of her skin in the ultimate road trip.
“Open your eyes, Natalie,” he coaxed, his voice low with a need he knew was just beginning. “You’re missing the view.”
Her eyes flickered open and she stared ahead openmouthed. Wide stripes of burnished orange laced with muted pink encircled them. She dropped her hands from the armrests.
“Oh, Derek, it’s breathtaking!” she exclaimed. “I never thought flying could be this beautiful.”
I think she’s going to be okay.
His heart soared with joy and relief as he watched her gaze out the window.
She turned to him, her eyes shining with delight. “Is this why you like to fly?”
His eyes moved across her tawny-brown skin, the color of fall acorns, glowing in the radiance of the sunset.
“I get to touch heaven,” he replied, nodding. “There’s nothing else like it.”
He didn’t bother mentioning the other reasons.
Up here he was away from the constant pressure to perform and the daily stress of maintaining his lifestyle. The sky was like a blank slate and he imagined that all his past mistakes were erased, or at least hidden among the clouds.
Until wheels touched ground and the cold reality hit hard.
Nothing about his life had changed.
She wouldn’t understand anyway.
The woman who made it her business to run other people’s lives probably ran her own with clocklike precision. On the other hand, he’d had no trouble making a mess out of his own.
Still he pushed aside the anguish that dogged his conscience, refusing to entertain any more doubts. This time, when he landed, things would be different. Not right away, he realized, but soon.
Natalie fluffed her hair. “I can imagine flying must be an expensive hobby.”
Her practical tone reminded him of his accountant. He’d warned Derek not to buy the plane, citing ongoing maintenance, fuel, storage and security costs, but he did it anyway.
“It is,” he admitted, trying not to sound defensive. “But you know every man has to have a few toys.”
As the words flew out of his mouth he realized how immature they sounded. He was living a life many dreamed of, but few achieved, yet what did he have to really show for it? Who did he have to share it all with?
“Where’d you grow up?” he asked.
Her voice was shy. “You’re not going to believe this,” she replied. “Park Avenue.”
“Really?”
She nodded. “My parents were both surgeons at Lenox Hill Hospital, and they were the first African-Americans to purchase an apartment in our co-op,” she said, her face beaming with pride.
“Well, my parents were one of the first to move out of Pinecrest. My brother Wes, my dad and I moved to Baker’s Falls at the beginning of my freshman year in high school.”
He paused a moment, waiting for her to ask about his mother, but she didn’t. He breathed a sigh of relief.
“So I guess we do have something in common.”
“What’s that?” she asked.
“Parents who cared enough to take a risk for the sake of their kids.”
She turned away, seeming to fold inside herself, and was quiet. Just like that, the easy camaraderie they’d shared was gone and he knew he’d said something wrong again.
He rubbed a hand down his face and swore inwardly. Flying a plane was so much easier than understanding a woman.
Suddenly there was a loss of elevation.
Natalie screamed and clutched the armrests. “What was that?”
The sound raked his ears and he gritted his teeth. “Air pocket,” he explained. “Nothing to worry about.”
“Tell that to my stomach,” she moaned, pointing to it.
He glanced at her quickly, and her eyes were lidded as she leaned her head against the tiny window.
Oh, man. He thought dealing with a fear of flying was bad, but a nauseated woman was much, much worse. If he was ever lucky enough to get married, he’d be a blubbering idiot when his wife got pregnant and started running to the bathroom every morning.
The image terrified him. He cleared his throat. “Barf bags are under the seat.”
She clucked her tongue at him. “Gross! I would never do that in front of a guy,” she insisted, her face ashen. “No matter how sick I felt.”
He breathed out a slow sigh of relief. “I’m glad to hear it, but I thought I’d inform you, just to be on the safe side.”
“Thanks,” she replied. “But I won’t be needing them.”
Derek scanned the instrumentation panel and spoke with air traffic control, who informed him that the winds had shifted from south to northwest.
They bumped along for a few more minutes as Derek struggled to keep the plane steady and his image intact. He’d made it his mission in life to avoid showing weakness to anyone—his opponents, his teammates, but especially women.
He winced when Natalie squealed with fright so loudly the sound bounced off every surface of the cockpit.
“Are you sure you know how to fly this thing?” she screamed.
“Don’t worry,” he soothed, keeping his eyes on the horizon and wishing he could kiss her fears away instead. “I’ll take care of you. I promise.”
Just then, the ride smoothed out and he blew out a breath. He turned to Natalie and gave her a triumphant smile.
“You see? Nothing to worry about. My father taught me to never break a promise. I can’t let anything happen to all that beauty.”
A smile feathered across Natalie’s face, and Derek was thankful she took his compliment in stride. He figured that with her looks, she’d probably heard it all. A beautiful woman like her had to have a boyfriend.
Even so, she seemed like the type of woman who chose her man the way she did her diamonds—wisely and with much examination. Would he ever make the cut? Did he even want to?
Natalie crossed her arms and gave him a questioning look, as if she were trying to figure out if he really meant what he’d said and why.
“I’ll feel better when my feet are on solid ground.”
“I understand,” he said with a nod. He glanced over at her to make sure her seat belt was still fastened. “I’m in the process of making our descent now.”
The plane broke