Mary glanced to Hannah for her reaction. The plate in the older woman’s hand looked dangerously close to slipping to the floor, so rapt was her attention. Karl looked down, but was that a smile he was trying to hide? William readied himself to answer her, but Mary raised her hand to stop him.
“Please, let me finish, sir. You, Pastor Mayweather, aren’t responsible for me. I am responsible for myself, my own actions and my own consequences. If I were afraid of dying, I would have never signed my agreement with the Mission Board after they spelled out the possible dangers.”
William wedged in a quick answer. “With all due respect, Miss O’Hara…”
“If you wish to accord me respect, then please address me as Doctor O’Hara.”
“Doctor O’Hara, then. I don’t see how you can possibly understand what you might be getting yourself into.” William relaxed his fists and stretched out his hands in an apparent plea. “The interior is fraught with dangers, and even if you manage to live through your first bout of malaria, there are still wild animals and hostile cannibals to face.”
A blanket of emotional exhaustion wrapped itself around Mary. The man meant well. It was tempting to just walk away. But where would she go from here?
Returning home to her parents was out of the question. Her father’s reply to her last letter clearly stated his anger and grief over what she’d done. Better to stay here where she could hope to do some good, to atone for her brother’s loss.
Resolved, Mary straightened her spine. “I thank you for your concern, Pastor Mayweather, but I had malaria as a child back in Virginia. The animals and cannibals I’ll deal with when the time comes. I have orders to establish an infirmary at Nynabo, and Clara is to run the school. While I would prefer to have a man of your experience along, I will do so with or without your help.”
William sat on the front porch rocker after the women retired for the evening and wished the inky darkness would simply swallow him whole. What was he to do with this impossible woman? Nothing he said dissuaded her. And to make matters worse, she was right. Her orders gave her all the permission she needed to proceed without him. It would be a total disaster and she would undoubtedly get both herself and her companion killed. Or worse. The only mission posts run by women tended to be on the coast where help was more readily available. Even government troops hesitated to travel the interior, a fact he’d ignored when he’d taken Alice to the bush.
His sweet Alice. She’d wanted nothing more than to please him when he’d told her he felt the call to salvage the mission where his uncle and aunt had been martyred. She’d trusted him. He’d let both her and God down. The year of compassionate leave helped, but what he really needed was to put his hand back to the proverbial plow once again. But not while responsible for not one but two women this time.
Panic at the very thought brought William to his knees, using the railing as if it was a makeshift altar.
Father, why have you sent me this woman? Have I incurred your displeasure that my task would be made so impossible? Please, God. Turn her heart. Show her the error of this decision or show me what I must do to end this foolishness.
“Am I interrupting?” Karl’s voice jolted William from his silent pleas. Karl stood in front of him with a kerosene lamp.
“No. I was just finished.”
“This is one of my favorite places to pray.” Karl settled himself in one of rockers he’d made with his own hands as a gift last year to his wife. “I can see you are struggling with the direction things have taken, William. It is good that you are taking this to the Father.”
“I don’t know what else to do, Karl. There is simply no dissuading her. Even in this short time I realize she has to be the most stubborn female I have ever met.” William returned to the rocker next to Karl’s. The lamp Karl set on the floor cast the older pastor in an eerie light.
“She reminds me of a stubborn young missionary I know.”
Was that a trick of the shadows or did Karl have a twinkle in his eye? He wasn’t seeing the seriousness of this situation. “Is it merely stubbornness on her part? How many funerals of fellow missionaries have you presided over, Karl? It is one thing for a man to choose the risk on his own, but a woman in the interior?”
“My Hannah would tell you that God calls us all alike, Jew and Greek, male and female.”
“God also expects us to learn from our mistakes. I understand now what my uncle must have known before he and Aunt Ruth were killed.”
“I’m sure that he and your aunt knew the peace of God over all else, my son.”
“But next to God, he loved my Aunt Ruth more than life itself. Surely he knew in those last moments that taking her to tribes that cannibalize their enemies was a mistake. He must have regretted being responsible for her horrible death.”
“You mean like you feel responsible for Alice’s?”
“Exactly. I should have learned from my uncle’s failure, but I didn’t. And my ignorance cost Alice her life.”
“Malaria cost Alice her life, William, and your aunt and uncle were in God’s hands.” Karl stood and picked up his lantern. “You’re letting your grief blind you to God’s bigger plan. You need to trust that He is in control, that He is sovereign in all things.”
“I trust God. It is this place I do not trust. You can’t tell me it is the Divine plan for the women we are charged to protect to be put in such needless danger when we can avoid it.”
“No, I can’t tell you. It’s up to God to show you His plan.” Karl moved to the front door. “I’ll pray earnestly for you, William, that God will reveal His plan in due time.”
“Thank you, Karl. I covet your prayers.”
The illumination receded with Karl as William sat alone in the darkness. A thousand lights burned their autumn patterns in the sky above him, but it was the light of an idea beginning to burn in his mind that captured his attention. He would go to Nynabo, no matter what. He could see to it that neither woman was exposed to the dangers of the interior any more than necessary. Especially not the cannibalistic tribes of the Pahn.
And he would die trying if that’s what God’s plan required.
William rose and headed into the house to find stationery. He might not be able to stop them from going to Nynabo, but a letter to the Mission Board would shorten their stay there. Once he explained his dissatisfaction with Dr. O’Hara and her unsuitability for the post, the Board would have to act and both women would be sent packing for safer quarters. God’s work would continue and he’d avoid ventures into the more dangerous territories until her replacement arrived.
He couldn’t give his Alice the long life she’d deserved, but he’d do everything in his power to see the women temporarily in his care didn’t meet the same end. Dr. O’Hara would live to use her talents for God some place safer. Some place far more suitable.
Chapter Two
Mary slapped at the millionth mosquito trying to make her a meal. Futile, but instinctive. Ten hours into the journey to Nynabo should have taught her that swatting was a waste of energy. Clara was smarter. She had stayed in the hammock chair and draped netting to keep the pests away. Mary, on the other hand, just had to prove she was capable of walking on her own.
The waning light through the heavy jungle canopy told her evening was near. Night’s fall brought a sudden inky blackness that only campfires relieved. So surely William would call camp sometime soon. No, not William, she corrected herself. Pastor Mayweather. It wouldn’t do to think of him in anything but the most formal of terms. The man acted as if she were his own personal trial.