They’d been over this too many times already.
“I’d like to leave without bad feelings between us. I know you’d rather not be married to me anymore, but we can’t do anything about that right now.”
“And your point is?” she asked, deliberately sarcastic.
“Dammit, Cecilia, would you listen to us? Is this what you want? Is this how you want things to be? I don’t. I followed you here because I thought…I hoped there’d be a chance for us to end this on a friendly note.”
“Divorces aren’t friendly.”
“You’re right, but does that give you any pleasure?”
It didn’t. She knew why he’d come. Ian would leave for sea in a few days, and when he left he wanted to go without a huge knot in his gut over her.
“Goodbye, Ian,” she said softly. “Have a good tour.”
He frowned, as though he wasn’t sure he should trust her. “Do you mean it?”
She nodded. “I don’t want to fight, I never did. Go with a clear conscience. When you get back, we’ll settle all the legal stuff.”
“Thank you.” His relief was evident and his eyes softened as he turned away. Cecilia watched him disappear into the fog, watched until she could no longer see his dark shape.
She closed her eyes. She pictured how their parting might have been if Allison had lived. She’d be standing on the pier with all the other Navy wives and Ian would kiss her goodbye, kiss Allison and then her again, one last time. Then he’d run toward the aircraft carrier and she’d hold the baby in her arms, raise Allison’s tiny arm so she could send her daddy off with a wave. Instead, they bade each other farewell standing over their daughter’s grave.
Justine had avoided her mother all weekend, and with good reason. The minute they were together, Olivia would start to criticize Warren. Not openly, but she’d insinuate things. For instance, she’d mention some piece of gossip she’d supposedly heard about one of his ex-wives. Or she’d refer to problems with one or other of the homes his company constructed.
In Justine’s opinion, the fact that she was seeing Warren was none of her mother’s business. Okay, he was a few years older. And she’d concede that his reputation wasn’t the greatest. But there were things about Warren that her mother and most other people didn’t know and never would. Warren trusted her and his confidence meant a great deal to her.
The second reason Justine had been avoiding her mother had to do with her brother James. A year earlier, without warning, he’d joined the Navy and as a result, was away from home for the first time. He missed his family, and their mother fretted about him. Now her younger brother had made another life-altering decision and had left it to Justine to announce to their family.
“Tell her for me,” he’d pleaded, and because she loved him she’d foolishly agreed.
Now a confrontation was inevitable. Monday morning, she’d half decided to call her grandmother and let Charlotte deliver the news. She went as far as picking up the phone and actually dialing the number. At the first ring, she’d replaced the receiver, berating herself as a coward.
All afternoon, she’d had difficulty concentrating on loan applications and staff meetings—she was the manager of the Cedar Cove branch of First National Bank and had plenty of responsibilities to occupy her. Justine sighed; she knew she had to tell her mother in person and as soon as possible.
After work, she drove straight from the bank to the family home at 16 Lighthouse Road. She’d lived here until she left for college ten years ago; she’d returned for short periods in the intervening years. It was home in a way no other place had ever been. Every time she took the curve in the road and came upon it, Justine experienced a sensation that had been impossible to reproduce anywhere she’d lived since.
She parked out front. Her mother must have been looking out the window when she drove up, because she opened the door as Justine climbed the steps to the porch.
“Sweetheart,” Olivia said, holding out her arms for a hug. “This is a pleasant surprise.”
Justine forced a smile.
“You’re just in time for dinner.”
Justine could never figure out why her mother insisted on feeding her. It was the same with her grandmother. A maternal need to nurture, she supposed. Not that she needed nurturing anymore. Well, not that kind. “Great,” she said, without enthusiasm. Her stomach was in knots already.
Olivia took a good look at her. “Something on your mind?”
Radar. Justine swore her mother had radar.
“Why don’t you make a pot of tea?” she suggested.
Her mother froze. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you? Dear God, don’t tell me you’re going to marry Warren!”
“Mother, just make the tea and no, I’m not pregnant.”
“Thank God.” Her relief couldn’t have been more evident. Did she even realize how insulting her reaction was?
Olivia moved into the kitchen and Justine followed.
“That was rude of me, honey. Forgive me,” her mother said, putting the kettle on the burner. She sighed. “You know the way I feel about Warren.”
Justine didn’t need to be reminded.
“But you seem to enjoy his company and that’s all that matters.”
Justine didn’t respond to her mother’s halfhearted apology. What was the point? Yes, she liked Warren, but she wasn’t blind to his faults, either. The most appealing thing about him was his age. Justine liked older men. They were settled, confident and, for the most part, secure. She didn’t intend on having children herself and was looking for a mature relationship. She found most men her own age childish and irresponsible.
Olivia poured the tea and carried two cups to the dining-room table. “All right,” she said when they’d both sat down. “If you’re not pregnant, then what’s wrong?”
Justine ignored the question and doctored her tea. “I heard from James last week.”
Her mother stared at her blankly. “What does James have to do with this?”
“He sounded good.”
“Good?”
“Happy,” she elaborated.
“Does he have a new girlfriend?”
She couldn’t believe her mother hadn’t made the connection. “Not…exactly.”
“He’s seeing the same girl as before? Selina? I can’t recall her surname at the moment.”
“Solis.”
“Hmm. Every time James mentions her, they’re fighting over one thing or another.”
“They’re getting along just fine at the moment,” Justine said, struggling not to laugh outright. Her mother appeared to be completely dense.
“I’m glad to hear it.”
“Are you, Mother?” Justine pressed.
“Of course I am.” Olivia hesitated. “Are you trying to tell me that James and Selina are engaged?”
“No, I’m here to tell you they’re married.”
“Married?” Olivia came out of her chair and just as quickly sat down again. “Married? Without letting me know? Without a word until the deed is done?”
“James was afraid of how you’d react.”
“He should be a lot more afraid of what I’m going to say now,” Olivia muttered grimly.