Digging the coffee can into the corn again, he sprinkled it out in a wide pattern and repeated the action several times. He needed the solitude that was here in his woods, needed to be away from people—being around Leo and Annie had solidified that belief. And yet, he was restless. And he figured he always would be. All the people who’d offered him advice had said that time would heal. He knew it wouldn’t. He couldn’t imagine time taking the slightest edge off the guilt he felt. Because no matter what his brothers tried to tell him, he knew in his heart that he could have stopped that wreck if he hadn’t been so tired. He’d known his mind was fuzzy and his head had bobbed several times. Try as he might, he couldn’t remember the impact of the wreck. He couldn’t remember that moment when he had seen what was happening. He couldn’t remember whether his head had been down and he’d been asleep when that drunk had hit him.
Had he been asleep at the wheel when that car had come across the yellow line and hit him, sending him plowing into the oncoming traffic? It was a question he would forever ask himself. And yet, what did it matter? He knew how much like soggy bread his thoughts had been and how elastic that had made his response time.
He knew.
And there was no amount of time that would distance him from that knowledge.
Nope, he was responsible for killing that family and he would have to live with that for the rest of his life.
There was no prison sentence harsh enough for what he’d done, so a life sentence of guilt was a most just penalty.
Having a child look at him with hero worship in his eyes had almost killed him.
He hadn’t been able to take it—and so he’d run.
Here in the solitude of his woods, for now, was where he belonged. At least until he figured out how to deal with this.
His fist tightening around the cup, he jammed it deep into the corn, then slung the hard yellow kernels in a violent arch. Almost in the same instant, shouts echoed in the distance.
Screams.
Colt froze, thinking at first he’d flashed back to the night of the wreck. When the screams came again, shrieks of unmistakable fear, he knew better.
Colt bolted into action. Tossing the coffee can to the ground, he ignored the pain shooting through his collarbone as he charged through the woods in the direction of the screams.
It was coming from the old Tipps place. But Lilly kept that property empty. Or had up till now.
The yells were getting closer. He raced, pushing through scraggly limbs, dodging rocks and fallen logs. Two people by the sound, one of them a woman and one a child. It was about two hundred yards between his cabin and the fence line that separated the two properties. Heart pounding with adrenaline and worry about what he would find when he got there, Colt did not let up as he ran. Briars tore at his arms and face, as he could use only one hand to brush them out of the way. His broken collarbone screamed at him in pain with each stride. He ignored it and focused on the two ahead of him.
He reached the fence quickly despite it seeming as though he’d been moving in slow motion. He could see them before he reached the fence. Annie Ridgeway and Leo standing behind a pitiful excuse of a tree as a blistering-hot momma cow charged them. Colt planted his good hand on the top of the wooden post, and catapulted himself over the fence. Grimacing, the pain very nearly brought him to his knees when he landed.
No time to waste, he began yelling to draw the cow’s attention his way. “Yah!” he yelled, loud and gruff. “Get on outta here.”
Annie and Leo whooped excitedly when they saw him charging across the pasture. The momma cow halted in its tracks, looked at him and then started to charge them again.
“Yah, yah!” Colt yelled louder. Coming up on the left side of the ol’ gal, he saw her calf in the distance. So that was the problem. They’d gotten between her and her baby and she wasn’t happy.
He waved his good arm, charged at the cow for a few steps, making her think he was coming after her, and she decided to take the baby and run. Tail tucked, she trotted away, glaring back at him once as if to dare him to come after her baby.
“Colt, Colt!” Leo exclaimed, racing from behind the sapling.
Seeing two Leos running toward him, Colt fought off dizziness and willed the pain that shuddered through his shoulder to go away.
“Boy, it sure is good to see you,” Leo said, sliding to a halt in front of him. “I thought we was done for! Yessir, I sure did.”
Annie was breathing hard when she reached him. Fear shone in her eyes like red flags, intertwined with relief. “I don’t know where you came from, but—” Her voice broke and she visibly fought down the need to cry. “I’m so glad you came.”
“That was one mad momma.” Leo’s voice squeaked from having screamed so much.
“Yeah, it was.” Colt patted the kid on the head, pulling his gaze from Annie. “You’ve got to always go cautiously when you’re around mommas and their babies.”
“We were just walking, checking out the place, when Leo spotted the calf and raced off toward it. He didn’t see the momma,” Annie explained, her breathing finally getting back to normal. “I almost didn’t get Leo away from her. If you hadn’t shown up...” Her lip trembled and her unspoken words hung between them.
“You would have figured something out,” he encouraged her. Something told him she would have, too. His own fear subsided a little bit as they stared at each other.
“So where did you come from?” she asked, pressing a hand hard against her stomach as if holding back her fear.
He yanked a thumb back over his shoulder to indicate the direction he’d run from. “My place backs up to this one. My cabin is just over that fence and through the woods a little.”
Annie’s jaw dropped. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
“He don’t have to be kidding, Annie Aunt! I like it,” Leo exclaimed.
Colt chuckled. “I’m just as surprised to find you here as you are to find me here. Lilly doesn’t usually rent this house out.”
“That’s what I was told. It’s perfect for us, though.”
“We didn’t even know you lived in the woods.” Leo laughed, the joy in his eyes dug into Colt like pins and needles. “Ain’t that just a big ol’ kick in the pants?”
“Leo,” Annie warned.
“Sorry,” he said, looking up at Colt as if he were about to get thirty lashes. “I’m not supposed to say ‘kick in the pants.’”
“You are also not supposed to say ‘ain’t,’” Annie added, tugging gently on his ear.
He sighed. “Or ‘can’t,’ either.”
She chuckled at that, sending a warm shot of sunshine through Colt. It spread over him like rays melting ice, while she studied him with her pale gray eyes that again looked almost lavender in the morning light. Looking at her, it hit him how pretty she was. It wasn’t something he’d noticed earlier, and it startled him to be noticing now. She had a simple, quiet look about her, a peacefulness. It drew him to her and he couldn’t take his eyes off her.
Colt was startled by the attraction. It felt nice, and so did smiling and chuckling as he’d been doing since he’d hopped the fence. But it also felt wrong.
Feeling the sunshine she’d sparked inside of him fading into the darkness, he fought to hang on to it. All the while knowing he didn’t deserve to feel that warmth and goodwill.
His gaze lingered on her. She was