“We’re not all like you, with relations who miss us when we’re gone,” she added in an even tone.
“Your parents are still living.”
“The last time I saw them was Christmas two years ago. We took a winter cruise together.” She’d bought it for them as a gift with hopes of building something more of their relationship now that she was an adult.
It hadn’t worked. They’d been no more interested in getting to know the grown-up Iris than they had the child. And as much as it hurt to admit, looking at them through adult eyes, she realized her parents were not people she would particularly care to know well, either.
She’d finally given up hope of having anything resembling a real family and hadn’t bothered them with so much as an email since. Though now she realized that she’d begun to give up that particular dream when Asad had left.
She simply hadn’t been aware of it until her parents’ continued indifference pounded the final nail into the coffin that had been her hope.
“Two years ago? But that is criminal. Why would you neglect your parents so shamefully?”
His absolute inability to understand charmed her when she thought probably she should have been offended. But to discover the worldly sheikh so naive in even one area was rather captivating.
“When was the last time you saw your parents?” she asked curiously.
“Last month.” He cocked his head to the side, studying her like a specimen under glass. “I travel to Geneva three times a year.”
So the decision to allow his grandparents to raise Asad, and groom him to take over as sheikh, had not destroyed their relationship completely. He might resent it somewhat, but he still cared for his parents and she was certain they cared for him, as well.
“Your family is happy to see you when you do, I imagine.”
“But naturally.”
She nodded. Lucky him. Even after the barbaric bargain, he had parents and siblings who loved him and wanted to see him. And probably a lot more often than the three times a year he went to see them. “For your family, yes. We aren’t all so lucky, Asad.”
His expression turned thoughtful. “In the ten months of our liaison, you never mentioned a visit from or to your parents. I assumed it was because you saw no reason to introduce me to your family.”
It was a reasonable hypothesis, considering the fact Asad himself had not been thinking in terms of a future together. He’d no doubt assumed that while he’d returned home on winter and spring break to see his family, she’d been doing the same. Instead, she’d spent those weeks by herself on campus missing him more than she ever had her parents.
He’d never made any move toward introducing her to anyone in his family and because of her past, she hadn’t found that odd. Only later had she realized that a man did not introduce his relatives to a casual lover. Particularly not a man slated to one day become sheikh.
Silly her. Iris had thought he was waiting for the right time when the truth was, there was never going to be any such thing for them.
“Once again, I guess we were both guilty of making assumptions.” She shook her head, tired and in no mood to prevaricate. “I don’t have a family, Asad. I had an egg and sperm donor who were kind enough to financially support me until I graduated from university.”
He jerked back as if she’d slapped him. “That is a very cynical thing to say about the people responsible for giving you life.”
“I don’t expect you to understand. Your parents allowed your grandparents to raise you in the ways of the Bedouin and while I’m sure you felt abandoned by them, no matter how much you might deny it, the truth is, they never gave you up. Not really. My parents kept legal rights to me, but for all intents and purposes, I was their unwanted ward, not their daughter.”
“And you called my grandparents’ deal with my parents barbaric,” he said in a tone laced with a heavy dose of shocked disapproval.
She just shook her head. He was right. She was in no position to judge and certainly Asad had far more of a family than she did. Though she noticed he didn’t deny feeling abandoned by his parents.
He frowned, looking like he wanted to say something more.
She put her hand up in a silent bid for him to leave it. “Like I said, I don’t expect you to get it. Why should you? I never did, and they were supposed to be my family. I’m tired and I want to go to bed. All right?”
Though why she was asking him, instead of just going into her room, she didn’t really know.
“I don’t suppose I could persuade you to share mine,” he said in the same teasing tone he used to employ to lighten things when they got too serious when they’d been together.
She’d avoided telling him the truth about her parents because it shamed her to admit she was unloved, but she remembered now the other reason that she’d kept the truth buried. Asad had been so very good at keeping her smiling and happy, she’d been loath to bring the pain of her left-behind childhood into the present.
And, back then, there had still been that tendril of hope that one day her parents were going to realize Iris was someone they could enjoy having in their lives.
She gave him a smile now, not nearly as forced as it should have been. “You’re an idiot.”
She’d said the same words, or something like them, to Russell earlier, and knew it was because, even after everything, part of her still considered Asad to be a friend.
Perhaps, for a woman like her—who trusted with such difficulty—once trust was given, it could never be withdrawn entirely. The ramifications of that possibility were not good for her heart, not at all.
Unaware of her inner turmoil, Asad gave her a lazy smile she hadn’t seen in a very long time. “No, an idiot would let the opportunity slip by.”
For a terrible uncertain moment, Iris was tempted to take him up on the offer. She’d never felt like she belonged anywhere like she did in his bed. It had all been a fantasy, but it had felt real. In his arms, she’d felt like she had a family.
And it had almost killed her to lose him.
She wasn’t setting herself up for that again. She couldn’t.
She didn’t bother to reply, but simply slipped into her room. Tying the cords that would keep the curtain snugly over her doorway while she slept, she ignored the tears tracking down her cheeks.
The next day, as much as she tried to hold herself aloof, Iris found herself falling under the spell of the four-year-old daughter as easily as she had the father six years before. Nawar had spent the entire day, except her nap, acting as Iris’s shadow.
It had been a busy day, filled with preparations for the feast and chatter with Asad’s female relatives.
Iris had enjoyed herself so much that she’d felt guilty for not working, despite the fact a phone call from Sheikh Hakim had made it clear that he did not expect Iris to begin her geological assessment until after she’d been officially welcomed into the city of tents.
Now that the food and party preparations were over, Genevieve had told Iris it was time for their personal preparations. Iris had intended to wear the single dress she’d brought with her for what she’d believed was to be a remote field assignment, but Genevieve would not hear of it.
She and Nawar had made a big production out of choosing a galabia from Genevieve’s wardrobe for Iris to wear to the feast. And the small girl had now appointed herself as Iris’s instructor in the ways of bathing in the communal baths of the Sha’b Al’najid.
They were now soaking in the largest of the pools fed by an underground