She wanted to scream, but held on to her control for a moment more. âYes, but not sharing a bed.â
He was silent so long that she shifted uncomfortably. Finally, he said, âJames will get his wayâyou said that yourself.â
âBut if we give him the marriage, maybeââ
âHe doesnât want this half-done, Christina. You know that. But Iâm not going to force you to do something you donât feel comfortable with.â
She raised her brows, pointedly surveying her disheveled room. âIt seems like thatâs exactly what youâre doing. Iâm definitely not comfortable with this.â
âWe each have a side. Iâll keep my clothes and stuff upstairs, out of your way. This doesnât have to be any more intimate than two people sleeping beside each other.â
She wanted to study his face, see if he really believed that, but she couldnât scratch up the nerve. Instead, she concentrated on maintaining what small modicum of grace she still possessed.
âLook,â Aiden said, âif weâre gonna do this, weâve got to be all in. Either that, or get out now.â
Christina glanced at the door to Lilyâs room. âNo. Iâm in,â she conceded. But as she turned back to measure the queen-size mattress dominating her small room, she had to ask, âCouldnât you have bought two twins?â
His grin should be illegal. âWhereâs the fun in that?â
* * *
Christina shoved leaden limbs through the armholes of her nightgown and dragged it on. The day had been long, and an even longer, probably restless night lay ahead. Her emotional turmoil was compounded by worries over Lily, Jamesâs health, the bargain sheâd agreed to and Aiden...always Aiden. Nicole had testing to keep her away for the next two days, but Christina looked forward to the nonstop vigil Lilyâs care required. Sometimes she wished taking care of Lily were a bit more labor intensive. It might help her think a whole lot less.
Her sigh echoed around her tiny bedroom. Soon sheâd be the wife of Aiden Blackstone. The cocktail of fear, desire and worry bubbling through her veins might just be enough to keep her awake until then.
But hopefully not. She stared at the new queen-size bed that consumed more than its fair share of real estate. Great, another worry. How in the world could she share a bed with Aiden Blackstone?
Long moments spent unable to imagine such a thing convinced her to worry about it another day. Instead, she settled in and let lethargy weigh her into the mattress. Please, just a few hours of oblivion.
But before she could drift off, she heard a sound from Lilyâs room. Christinaâs heavy head lifted. Again, that shuffling sound. Muffled by the dressing room that connected her to the suite, but there nonetheless. Had Nolen or Marie come to check on Lily before retiring?
A grimace twisted Christinaâs lips as she pulled herself out from the warm nest under her covers. In the two years since Lilyâs stroke, sheâd often heard noises from her friendâs room. Sometimes the others came to say good-night. Sometimes a branch from the oak tree outside had scraped against the window. Sometimes she heard just the creaks and groans of a house that had seen a lot of living.
Each time, a small part of Christinaâs heart hoped it was her friend. That Lily had woken up and would walk in here to gift one of her gentle hugs and tell Christina she was okay. That she wasnât responsible for what had happened.
But it never came to beâand that broke Christinaâs heart.
A muffled voice sounded through the partially closed door of the dressing room, and Christina slowed, not wanting to interrupt. As she paused, the words âHey, Mom,â barely floated in and her feet rooted to the floor. Aiden? To her knowledge, he hadnât been to see his mother since heâd come to Blackstone Manor. But sheâd hoped. Someday.
She knew she should leave, give him some privacy. Instead, she found herself easing up to the door and peeking through the opening into the room beyond.
Aiden hunched forward in a chair just on the far edge of the faint illumination from the night-light. Even in the deep shadows she recognized his long, solid build. His head hung low, and his shoulders slumped, as if a weight of emotion dragged him down. He remained silent for long moments, not moving, almost not breathing. It was hard to reconcile him with the virile man who had confronted her on the stairs days ago. Or whoâd stood his ground against the derision of Jason and his crew.
Her thoughts cut off as he looked up, gifting her with the sight of his strong features and stubble-lined jaw. It intrigued her, that small sign of weariness, that little mark of imperfection on a man usually so perfectly groomed. Would it scratch her skin if he kissed her? His deep-set eyes barely glittered in the darkness, lending to the mystery, the hushed intimacy of the moment.
âI screwed up, Mom,â he said, surprising Christina with not only his words but his matter-of-fact tone. âI left here a kid, full of anger and pride. I had no idea what that would cost me, cost us. But especially you.â
He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it in spiky disarray instead of sculpted artistry. âYou didnât blame me then, and you probably donât blame me now. Thatâs the kind of person you are. But I blame me. Boy, do Iââ
The small choking sound tore Christinaâs heart. She saw no evidence of tears, but the depth of Aidenâs sorrow reached out from across the space separating them. She wanted to go to him, hold him and tell him his mother understood. Her foot moved before she realized what was happening and only by locking down her muscles could she stop herself.
Invader. Aiden wouldnât want her comfort. And if he knew the role she herself had played in Lilyâs accident, hers would be the last face heâd want to see right now.
âBut I will make up for it. I promise you, you will stay in this house for the rest of your life.â
Iâll do my best, too, Christina thought.
He stood, hands fisted at his sides, but he made no move to approach the bed holding the ever-silent woman. âGrandfather thinks this is some kind of game, with him in the role of chess master. But itâs not. Itâs an act of penance. After all, youâd just been to see me when you had the accident. Coming to me because I refused to buck the old man and come to you. Resisting him was more important to me than you were.â Long moments elapsed when Christina could only hear the pounding of her heart.
His final words floated through the air. âIâm sorry, Mom.â
He remained still for the length of one breath, then two, before he turned and walked away.
Christina didnât move. Couldnât leave, couldnât continue forward. She stood frozen, held by the realization that this might be a game to James, but Aiden was more than a willing player. His investment was deeper than sheâd thought, and if he ever found out her involvement in Lilyâs accident, she would become the biggest loser of all.
Almost a week after making his pledge to his mother, the marriage license arrivedâand Aiden was royally screwed.
Oh, he would go through with it. In his gut, he knew this was the last thing he could do for his mother, one thing she could be proud of him for. Sheâd made her home here, been highly involved in the community, and sheâd want him to care for it, too.
He couldnât promise her heâd stay. But he could get her safely settled and make sure the town remained