“Of course, he didn’t, ninny!” she whispered to herself. “Get real. He seduced you—it was a one-night stand and you fell into his arms eagerly. Practically jumped into his arms.”
The cab whisked her away, and when the tall iron gates began to swing shut behind her she was certain she was closing a part of her life away. From this time forward, last night would only be a memory, yet she knew she had given Aaron much more than just her body.
Embarrassed and saddened, she had ridden home, packed for the weekend swiftly and rushed to her car to drive to Midland and the haven of Jessica’s small frame house. No matter how many miles she put between them, she couldn’t get Aaron out of her thoughts. The realization that they hadn’t used any protection came to her. Aaron had asked if she was protected, and, totally lost to the moment, wanting him as she had never wanted anything in her life, she had whispered yes.
“You know better than that!” she said aloud to herself.
Realizing she was sitting in the Royal Diner, talking to herself, Pamela took a deep breath. Aaron had asked if she was protected. She couldn’t blame him. And if he learned about her pregnancy—that must never happen. She wouldn’t even consider the possibilities.
She thought about the Blacks. Everyone in town knew that his parents had been into missionary work; his brother was a minister, channeling funds to worldwide missions, his older sister was a doctor in a third-world country. She didn’t know what his other brother did, but they were good people and used their enormous wealth to help others. Aaron had told her how he had gone into the diplomatic service because he thought he could try to do something to help world situations.
She ran her fingers across her brow. Aaron Black must never know he was the father of her baby. He would be a man to marry out of a sense of duty and doing the right thing. Aaron…
Such a pang hit her she clutched her middle. Longing rolled up through her like a tidal wave. Along with her body, she had given her heart to him. She knew that. But she was realistic. She was a veteran of watching pillars of the community sleep with her mother, give Dolly tokens of appreciation—or much more than tokens—cars, jewelry, but always they eventually turned their backs on Dolly and went their own way. And out in public she had seen them meet her mother and seen the furtive glances, the coolness, the lack of respect they had treated Dolly with.
She couldn’t bear that with Aaron. Aaron Black’s baby. Again, she pressed her hand to her flat stomach and felt a surge of maternal joy. She already loved this baby with her whole heart and she would devote her life to her precious child.
She would have to move from Royal because there would be too much gossip here, but that was something she didn’t have to worry about today. She just had to keep her condition a secret until her plans were made. It was a secret to be kept most of all from Aaron Black. He had already gone back to Europe, so there was little chance of his finding out unless Justin Webb or Matt Walker or another one of those buddies of Aaron’s learned about it and told him. And if he did find out, Matt was a good enough friend to respect her wishes. She could trust Matt to be the friend he always had been.
Once again the enormity of what she had done struck her. How could she have been so like her mother? How could she have thrown over all her caution when she had spent a lifetime being cautious? The man could charm the proverbial birds out of the trees, but that was no excuse. She had met charmers in college and had managed easily to say no. What was it about Aaron Black that twisted her into knots, melted her reserve, dissolved all barriers she kept up?
She clutched her middle again, aghast when she thought about how easy she had been, how careless, and what Aaron must think about her.
“Are you feeling better, Pamela?”
“I’m fine, thanks,” she said, aware of the waitress approaching the table. Sheila’s pink uniform was bright and her gaze was sharp.
“What happened was scary. I guess you’ll get over it as time goes by. Sorry you won’t get to go to Asterland to teach this semester. I heard the program was suspended.”
“That’s right, but with my ankle hurt, I wasn’t able to teach right after the crash,” Pamela said, wishing they could stop talking about it.
Sheila turned away, and Pamela stared at the giant burger and golden fries on her plate and knew she couldn’t eat a bite. Nor could she leave the entire burger and fries without stirring up a storm of comments. She sipped some of the chocolate malt, ate two bites of the burger, and then she couldn’t get down another morsel. She wrapped the burger and a few fries in her napkin and jammed them into her purse. Her purse would reek of hamburger, but she didn’t want any gossip starting now. No one ordered one of Manny’s juicy burgers and then left it with only a couple of bites taken out of it.
Thank heavens, so far, both she and Thad Delner led such straight and square lives that no one could conjure up gossip about them going together to the ball. And everyone in town knew he went to represent the school. Also, everyone in town was sorry about the loss of his wife, whom he had deeply loved. But once word got out that she had left the ball with Aaron Black, that would be another matter.
She slid out of the booth, paid and rushed from the diner before she had another conversation with anyone else. A few people were beginning to appear for lunch and she greeted them perfunctorily without even seeing who they were.
She drove home, her thoughts still churning, but an absolute determination growing within her that Aaron Black should never know about the baby. Their baby. She would call Jessica to tell her to watch for teaching jobs in Midland. The teaching position in Asterland was suspended this semester and by the next term, she would be very pregnant and she wouldn’t want to go to Asterland even if it were possible. She wanted her baby born here in Texas where she had friends.
Midland was larger than Royal, far enough away that her life would be her own, yet close enough she could get back to see her friends in Royal when she wanted to.
At least she didn’t have to worry about running into Aaron. He was halfway around the world and most likely had forgotten about her by now. She could imagine the kind of women in his life and wondered whether, while home in Texas, he had simply been amusing himself with the country girl that she was. In many ways Royal wasn’t a typical small Texas town because of oil money and all the wealth it produced. Basically, though, Royal was a small West Texas town and she was pure country.
She turned onto her street and saw her two-story brick apartment complex. She drove through the open wooden barriers that never closed and turned down the row to the back of her tiny apartment and her carport. As she approached her carport, her heart thudded. Seated on the tailgate of a shiny black pickup was Aaron Black.
Two
Her throat went dry and it was difficult to breathe. She felt hot, embarrassed, as if she were nine months pregnant instead of only weeks. There he was, and more than that, he looked marvelous. Her pulse raced like a shooting star. He looked as good in jeans and a plaid woolen shirt as he had in a tux. He wore scuffed boots and slid casually to his feet with his hands hooked into his wide, hand-tooled leather belt. A lock of brown hair fell across his forehead.
His green eyes were just as she remembered—going right through her. How could she keep her secret? Why was he here and not halfway around the world? What was she going to say to him? What did he want?
A cynical voice answered that question in a flash—another easy night with her. Her chin raised and her lips compressed while she tried to breathe deeply and wondered if she was going to faint right in front of him. Except she wasn’t given to fainting. It might be a lot easier if she could.
“Go away, Aaron Black,” she mumbled as she parked, and knew he was watching her every move. And then he was at the door, opening it and holding it for her.
When she stepped outside and looked up at him, her heart skipped beats. Gazing at him solemnly, she wrestled with her