Eve, shaking inside, sank into the chair across from Olivia. Her cousin reached across the table and took Eve’s hand.
“Are you okay?” she said softly.
Eve swallowed. “I guess I have to be, don’t I?”
“Oh, hon, I know how you must feel. I’m sorry, but I knew you needed to know.”
Eve nodded. Olivia did know how she felt. Olivia had been through worse. She’d lost her beloved husband, Mark, four years ago when his helicopter crashed in Afghanistan. Thea, her little girl, had been born after he died. “Wh-what was Adam doing at the hospital?”
“He came because of his mother. She had a heart attack yesterday. Apparently, his brother called him, and Adam came home. He told me he got in late last night.”
“You talked to him?”
“Yes.” Olivia worked the day shift in Registration and Admissions at the Crandall Lake Hospital.
“I thought you said Adam’s brother brought her in.”
“Yes, she was brought in late yesterday afternoon, after I’d gone home for the day, but several things were left off the admission form, so I went searching for Austin—you know, the brother who’s the lawyer. He’s the one who filled out the forms. By the time I found him, Adam was there, too.”
Eve knew who Austin was. She’d even seen him a few times, but she didn’t really know him and had never spoken to him. Crandall Lake was a small town, but not that small. People pretty much knew everything of interest or importance that was happening, but not everyone was on speaking terms with everyone else. “Is Adam’s mother okay?”
“She will be, according to the doctors, although there are more tests to run. But even if she is, she’ll be recuperating for a while, and apparently Adam’s going to stay right here in Crandall Lake while she does. In fact, he told me he hopes to bring her back to Nashville when she’s well enough to travel. He said he wants her to live with him.”
Eve got up to check the pasta while Olivia kept talking. But each word her cousin uttered contributed to Eve’s sense of unreality. Was this really happening? Was Adam Crenshaw really here? In Crandall Lake? For the duration of his mother’s recuperation? As far as she knew, he had never come back here before. She also knew—courtesy of the very efficient gossip network in Crandall Lake—that he’d taken care of his mother financially once he’d begun to make money, so that she’d never had to work again. And Eve had also heard how Lucy Crenshaw visited her son often. People had speculated about why he never came to Crandall Lake, though, and what they could do to get him to come. His appearance now was bound to create a huge splash.
Oh, God. What if she should run into him? What would she say? Could she manage it and act normal? Or would she fall completely to pieces like that old Patsy Cline song?
“Do you want to know anything else?” Olivia asked after a minute. “Or do you want me to quit talking about this?”
Eve didn’t immediately answer. Instead, to give herself time to calm down, she tested a strand of pasta, then turned the burner off and poured the pasta into a waiting colander sitting in the sink. She didn’t look at Olivia.
“Eve? You okay?”
“Yes.” But she wasn’t. She was a mess.
“You sure?”
Eve sighed deeply. Turned away from the sink and met Olivia’s eyes again. “How does he look?”
“Want me to say he’s really ugly in person? Or do you want me to be honest?”
“Be honest.”
“He looks even better than in his photos. Sexy and handsome and charming. But nice. Awfully nice. I can see what you saw in him, Eve. He didn’t act like a big star at all. He just seems like a regular guy. A decent, regular guy worried about his mother.”
Yes, even at eighteen he’d been all of those things. He’d been many other things, too. Sweet. Reckless. Sensitive. And lonely. He’d always tried to hide his gentler qualities, though. It hurt Eve to think about him, about the way he’d been with her, about how much she’d loved him, and how much she’d wanted to go away with him. That was why she had tried to erase him from her mind, to not think about him. But that had always been impossible. And always would be.
“What are you going to do, Eve?” Olivia asked as Eve finally picked up the drained pasta and dumped it into the pasta bowl sitting on the countertop. Absently, she ladled sauce over the steaming spaghetti.
“I don’t know. I mean, I probably won’t even see him.” But her mind was whirling. If he stayed long enough, chances are she would run into him. Then what?
“What if he calls you?”
“He won’t.” Eve put the bowl of spaghetti on the table. Took the casserole dish filled with her signature turkey meatballs out of the microwave where they’d been staying warm and set them on the table, too.
“But what if he does?”
Good question. What if he did? Eve sighed heavily. Looked at Olivia. “He won’t call me. I’m sure he hates me.” She laughed derisively. “If he even remembers my name!”
“Oh, Eve, come on. You’re being melodramatic.”
“No, I’m not. Think about it, Olivia. I let him down terribly. He loved me. I know he did. He wanted me to go away with him. To share his dreams. He even said the M word. In his mind, I would be just one more person he was counting on who had abandoned him.” She fought the tears that threatened. “I’ve had a lot of years to think about this. At the time, I thought he didn’t love me enough to stay. But I think the truth is, I didn’t love him enough...to go.”
“And you paid the price,” Olivia said softly.
Eve, fighting to keep from crying, nodded. “Yes. I—I made a mistake. I—I was a coward. Afraid to leave my safe world for the unknown.”
“You were just a kid.”
“I know that.”
“So cut yourself some slack.” Olivia smiled crookedly. “In his shoes, I would call you. I would be curious. Plus I’d want you to see with your own eyes how successful I was.”
“Men don’t think that way,” Eve said, finally gaining control of her runaway emotions. She went to the refrigerator and removed the salad and cruet of dressing she’d prepared earlier.
“Sure they do.”
“No, he won’t call me. He won’t want to have anything to do with me.”
“Okay, have it your way. So he won’t call you. But what if you see him somewhere?”
“I don’t know.” Once all the food was on the table, Eve sat across from her cousin. “I just hope, if I do see him, I don’t make a fool of myself.”
Olivia reached for the spaghetti server. “I’m glad I’m not in your shoes, hon.”
Eve reached for her napkin. I wish I wasn’t in them. The only thing she did know right now was that she had a lot to think about, and that she probably wouldn’t get much sleep tonight.
Her sins had finally caught up with her.
Twelve years earlier...
Eve kept looking at the clock on her bedside table. It was almost five. Her dad would be home from work any second. The minutes seemed to be going by so fast. Eight o’clock would be here before she knew it. She looked at her closed closet door. Her duffel bag was inside, on the top shelf. If she did go, the only way she could get it outside without her parents seeing it and asking questions would be to throw