Lani now walked ahead of him, shoulders tight under the fall of hair cascading to her waist.
Just a half hour ago he’d run his fingers though that silken mass and imagined them as partners—husband and wife. That idea had evaporated like the dawn mist, and now she again seemed like a semi-hostile stranger.
When she reached her room, Lani turned and fixed wide, worried eyes on him. “Thank you for helping me run the gauntlet.”
“I don’t know why I did.” He cocked his head. “Obviously I’m a soft touch.”
“You’re not. You’re a man of honor and that’s evident in everything you’ve said and done so far.” Her voice was steady and she leveled a clear gaze at him. “You should be king and it’s a terrible shame if I’ve somehow ruined that.”
Her words stopped his negative thoughts in their tracks. No one cared what Lani really wanted. She was expected to do whatever it took to ease the succession and make life easy for other people. None of this was her idea. What did she have to gain from sleeping with him, let alone marrying him? She’d probably rather be curled up with a good book and some saltines.
“Why did you agree to go along with my mom’s plot to trick me into marrying you even though you’re already pregnant with the heir?”
“She didn’t know I was pregnant when you first came. I didn’t, either. I found out that first night, when I was ill and left dinner early.”
Things started to fall into place.
He frowned when he realized that first passionate kiss had come before she knew about the baby. “So the wheels driving us into marriage were already rolling and you figured it was too late to stop them?”
“Your mom was so excited about you staying. And I liked the idea of my child being able to enjoy being a kid, without the pressure of already being a monarch. On some level the idea made sense, until…”
“Until you tried to get naked with me. Then there was nothing to hide behind.”
“I’m not cut out for deception.” She met his gaze with a hard stare of her own. Then it softened. “And you don’t deserve that. You’re a good man.”
Her ridiculously long hair fell about her shoulders. Her oddly shaped traditional dress didn’t hold together well without the sash. Those big eyes still brimmed with tears that glittered in her thick lashes. He fought a powerful urge to take her in his arms and comfort her.
Was he angry with her or at the unfortunate effect she had on him? She was just trying to do what everyone wanted of her. Tradition had shoved her between a rock and a hard place and he couldn’t help wondering which one he was. “I am glad you told me.”
“I couldn’t have lived with myself if I didn’t.” She held her neat chin high.
“Why would you put up with marrying a stranger in the first place? “
She looked away for a moment. “For Rahiri.” She looked back at him, expression serious. “And for your mom. You can see how happy everyone is to have you back.”
He shoved a hand through his hair and let out a bitter laugh. “So you have every reason to marry me except… me.”
Her cheeks darkened. “I’d have been proud to have you as my husband.”
AJ shook his head. “Proud. I’m not sure that’s entirely the sentiment I’d hope for in my wife, but it’s an interesting one.”
Lani swallowed, obviously embarrassed by her unsatisfactory response. “I am attracted to you.” Her shy whisper made a chuckle rise in his throat, and sent a jolt of lust to his groin.
“I’m grateful for that, at least.” He cocked his head. “I wouldn’t want to marry a woman who finds me repugnant.” He crossed his arms, trying to not be seduced by the rather dazed expression on her too-beautiful face. “So you were prepared to put up with me for the sake of Rahiri.”
She shrugged, and for the first time a sparkle of humor lit her eyes. “I figured I could handle it.”
“Your willingness to do your patriotic duty is impressive.” He couldn’t stop a smile hovering at the corners of his mouth. Then he remembered she’d intended to pretend her child was his. Her traditional dress concealed her shape. “How far along are you? “
Her face tightened. “Almost two months.”
“You conceived right before Vanu disappeared?”
She nodded. “That’s why I didn’t know I was pregnant.
When I felt ill, or tired, I just thought it was stress.”
“Vanu never knew about the baby.”
“No.” She held his gaze a little too boldly, as if she expected him to read something into that.
He wasn’t sure what to think. They’d been married for nearly five years, so why did she only become pregnant now? It was odd, unsettling. Too… convenient, somehow. “No one would have ever known it wasn’t my baby if you hadn’t told me.”
“I would have known.” Something glittered in her eyes. Determination, perhaps, or some of that steely strength hidden under her pretty exterior. Desire rose again inside him, a simmering flash of heat that warred with his anger at the deception.
“I appreciate your honesty.” He hesitated, thoughts weaving themselves in his brain even as warmth rose through his body. When he’d stated his intent to become king, he’d meant it. Tradition and honor now pumped through his heart along with his red blood cells. Suddenly it had seemed as if his whole life had led up to this night, when he assumed the responsibilities of leadership. He’d marshaled casts of hundreds, managed budgets and planned for contingencies. He knew how to deal with crises and manage difficult people and situations. The result, so far, had been about ninety minutes of entertainment for anyone who cared to watch, but as king of Rahiri he’d have the power to shape lives through investment in education and infrastructure.
Lani wasn’t the only reason he’d decided to stay. And now she wouldn’t be the reason he’d leave. “Maybe your little revelation doesn’t have to ruin everything.”
She blinked. “No?”
“Don’t play the innocent, now.” He laughed. “You know what I mean. We could still get married.”
Her cheeks reddened. “Even now that you know?”
“It’s a baby.” He shrugged. He could raise a child. What did it matter if it was his biological child or not? He’d never given much thought to family life, but the prospect held some appeal.
And he couldn’t deny that Lani held considerable appeal, too. Brave as well as beautiful, she’d risked everything to tell him the truth. Surely he could take a risk on a woman like that if it meant fulfilling the role everyone seemed so desperate for him to take on.
“I’m excited about having a baby.” Her face brightened. “I’ve been longing for one for years. It’s like a dream come true.” Her lips faltered. “Just at the wrong time.”
He wanted to ask why it had taken so long to conceive, but he held his tongue. Instead he said, “I’m not afraid of raising my brother’s baby.”
A dark shard of worry sliced into his mind. What if Vanu’s baby was like Vanu? He fought off the nasty thought.
AJ flexed the muscles in his back. They suddenly felt tight, maybe under the weight of so many expectations. “So the child would never know?”
“Things could get complicated because of royal succession.”
“I suppose we could tell him when he came of age, but I can see how it makes more sense to keep it quiet. When