Lies, lies, horrible lies to protect herself, to save her from complete and utter humiliation.
He looked as if he was about to call her on her fibs when there was a knock on the door. “That must be the food,” he said, heading to answer it.
Thank God. She gulped more caffeine. Blurting out that she loved him and wanted them to be together didn’t seem like such a hot idea in the cold, harsh light of day. But she wasn’t ready to go back to how they’d always been, either. For years she’d told herself that what she felt for Oakes was nothing more than infatuation. The remnants of a childhood crush.
But what if it wasn’t? Surely a crush wouldn’t have lasted this long.
She still thought of him often. Too often. Her heart tripped when she received a call or text from him. If they went too long between visits or chats she missed him. And when something happened in her life, good or bad, he was the first person she thought of telling, the person she wanted to share the news with more than anyone else.
She’d told herself to just get over it, to get over him already. Had tried to push her feelings aside. It wasn’t as if she sat around waiting for him to notice her. She’d gotten her undergraduate degree and was now in grad school. She’d dated other men, had even had a short-lived engagement that had ended six months ago.
And when those relationships ended, she found herself right back to square one. Thinking about Oakes. Wondering if he was the one for her.
She used to believe that if she and Oakes were meant to be, they’d end up together no matter what directions life took them in.
Now, though, she wasn’t so sure letting fate lead the way was the best idea. What if this was their opportunity? She was single and Oakes and Sylvie had only gone out a few times so they weren’t serious. Her drunken epiphany last night just might have been destiny’s way of giving her a good swift kick in the rear and telling her to take charge.
She had to be smart here, though. Had to try and figure out what Oakes thought about her, about them, before giving away too many of her own thoughts, her own feelings.
He was too honorable to make the first move. He probably thought she was too young for him. And he wouldn’t want to rock the boat where their families were concerned. Yes, it would take Zach, and their mothers, time to get used to the idea of them being together, but they’d all just have to deal. She’d been waiting six long years for Oakes to notice her as something other than Zach’s younger sister and a friend.
It was time he noticed her as a woman.
She had to ease him into the idea of being with her. Get him to think it was the best idea ever.
Mainly, she had to let him think it was his idea. She knew all about men and how sensitive they were about being led to do something. He had to take the lead.
With some encouragement from her, of course.
“Here we are,” he said, after shutting the door. He held up a large bag with the diner’s logo on it. “Best breakfast this side of Houston.”
“Let me help you.” She slid to her feet, crossed to him in what she hoped was a slow, seductive sashay and not a clumpy, eager gallop. But damn it, she was starving and the food smelled really, really good. She took the bag, waved him back to his seat. “The least I can do is dish this out. And I hope you’ll let me pay for it and whatever the cab cost.”
“My treat and so was the cab ride.” He grinned down at her, teasing and friendly. “But maybe next time you go out, you shouldn’t spend all your money on drinks.”
And the last thing she wanted was for him to look at her that way, as if she was some cute kid sister who’d gotten herself into a jam. “I didn’t spend all my money on drinks. I switched purses before we left and my wallet wouldn’t fit in my smaller one. I thought I’d grabbed my credit card and a fifty but my cousins were rushing me and I’d only put a ten in there along with my grocery store’s rewards club card. Luckily, my cousins insisted on paying for dinner—as they should since they kidnapped me and all.”
“How did you pay for your drinks then?”
“I didn’t.”
He followed her back to the counter, though he wouldn’t let her take the bag. He set it down and faced her. “You have generous cousins. They must have really wanted to make sure you had a good time.”
She laughed. “They can be generous, and they paid for a few rounds for all of us, but they weren’t the only ones buying me drinks last night.”
“They weren’t?”
She smiled. Maybe she could get a reaction out of him after all. “No. There were some very sweet men there who insisted on supplying me with beverages.”
He blinked. Blinked again. “You let some strange guy buy your drinks?”
She pursed her lips. “Actually, it was two guys. Strangers, yes, but I don’t think they were strange. Christopher was really funny and Ray had that whole bad-boy vibe going on, which made the night interesting.”
Oakes frowned, his eyes narrowed and she wondered if it was too soon to assume he was jealous, or if he was thinking of her with those other guys—not both at once, of course—when she could be with him.
“You shouldn’t accept drinks from strangers at bars,” he said, sounding irritated—very unlike easygoing Oakes. “Didn’t your mother ever tell you that?”
“Not in so many words.” Her mother knew she was capable of taking care of herself.
“I’m sure Zach warned you about it,” Oakes continued, not like a jealous man at all, but more like a lecturing teacher.
Or big brother.
“Men who buy women drinks at bars,” he continued in a voice way too similar to her freshman year lit professor’s superior tone, “do it for one reason and one reason only.”
“Really?” Setting her elbows on the counter, she cupped her chin in her hand and stared at him wide-eyed. “Do tell.”
His frown deepened. “They see you looking like...” He waved a hand at her, going up and down as if to take in her entire person. “That,” he finally said. “And they want to take you home.”
She blinked, slowly and with great exaggeration. “Whatever for?”
He looked so uncomfortable, she almost felt sorry for him. Almost. “You know what for.”
“A complete innocent like me?” she asked, hand to her chest. “Why, I haven’t a clue.”
“Sex,” he growled from between his teeth. “They’re hoping you’ll sleep with them.”
“No. That thought never crossed my mind. Thank God I have you here to set me straight on the nefarious ways of men in clubs.” She rolled her eyes. “It may come as a shock to you, but I’m not a child. I’ve gone out to clubs and bars before.” She lowered her voice and leaned forward. “I’ve even had sex before.”
He stepped back so quickly, he almost tripped over the stool behind him. “That’s... I don’t need to know...you don’t...”
She smiled. How could she not? He looked so horrified, but that wasn’t all. He looked...stunned. As if the thoughts of her and sex had never coexisted in his mind before. But then she looked closer, saw a definite heat in his eyes behind the panic, and she wondered if maybe, just maybe, that heat wasn’t the reason for the panic.
Maybe he didn’t see her as just a friend or some sort of little sister after all.
Only one way to find out.
She moved closer.