Then he shook himself angrily. She was going home tomorrow and a good thing too. He had his life to get on with.
CHAPTER EIGHT
AT ABOUT eleven o’clock the next morning, Fleur made her final preparations to go home. Sebastian had already left the house, but not before wishing her a casual goodbye and a safe journey, adding a slightly non-committal invitation to come and visit again some time. He had already brought her car around to the front entrance, and put her case in the boot.
Now, she gave one last look around the bedroom to make sure that she’d not left anything behind, then zipped up her hand luggage, slung her bag over her shoulder and went downstairs. Pat was in the kitchen and Fleur was aware of the tangibly sad atmosphere which prevailed. She bent down to smooth the head of the sleeping dog.
‘I shall miss you, Benson,’ she said softly. ‘Even if you did disobey me the other day.’
‘Not as much as we’re going to miss you,’ Pat sniffed.
They made their final goodbyes, with Fleur making vague promises to come back to Pengarroth Hall some time in the near future—though she knew that that was not likely to happen. She felt in her bones that her time here should have a final line drawn under it, and that now she should get back to the safety of work.
She smiled faintly as she passed the big gate at the top end of the estate—the one she’d mistaken for the main entrance, remembering Sebastian’s reaction when he’d spotted her sitting there in the semi-darkness. And, automatically, her mind did a rerun of everything that had happened since and her smile deepened. She had had a great time, as she’d told them all, but she finally admitted that the towering influence over the holiday had been that of her reluctant host.
Pausing for a moment at the crossroads before joining the B road which would eventually lead her to the motorway, Fleur made a face to herself as she thought about Sebastian. He hadn’t been reluctant at all, she decided, or, if he had been, he’d covered it up very well, because after his initial antipathy to Mia’s request that he should look after Fleur, he appeared to have warmed to the task with every day that had passed. If he’d wanted to avoid her, he could have done it easily enough. And, although she had deliberately tried to shut out of her mind all the things which Pat had said yesterday, the woman’s remarks would keep floating back into her consciousness. To imagine, even for a second, that Sebastian fancied her was too ridiculous for words! He was clearly not looking for another emotional relationship—he’d made that abundantly clear during one of their early minor discussions on the subject, and, even if he was, there’d be a plentiful selection of women in the elevated life he led from which to choose. She would not be top of his list, that was for sure. Then, having hardened those thoughts in her mind, Fleur experienced the familiar tingle of sensuousness when she remembered what had happened a few nights ago in her bedroom…how she’d clung to him and, more importantly, how he’d responded. Did he fancy her? Or had that been the automatic, passing reaction which any red-blooded male might have made in those circumstances? She shrugged. It was difficult to tell but, anyway, it was too late now. That incident had passed like water under a bridge, and neither of them had alluded to it since.
As she drove swiftly along the smooth, well-maintained road, her mind flipped to the time they’d spent together in Truro. They had both enjoyed their time together there—she had certainly enjoyed experiencing the city and then, when he’d joined her in the cathedral, his attitude had been so…so special. It had been a simple, yet magical day and he had been so considerate, so warm, and there seemed to have been that certain thread of familiarity between them which only a couple—a devoted couple—might expect to enjoy.
Irritated with herself for dwelling on things—things which were now of the past—she put on a CD and let the music of one of the Verdi operas swell around her like a comforting tide, filling her mind with its beauty.
The traffic began to thicken as she sped along, hampered largely by various delivery trucks and milk and petrol tankers, but as the distance between herself and Pengarroth Hall—and its owner—lengthened, Fleur felt distinct relief, a lightening of her mood. She was glad she’d decided to invent the excuse to go home early—because, right there in the centre of all her other thoughts, was the uncomfortable memory of Sebastian’s behaviour yesterday morning at breakfast. His suggestion that she had given Rudolph Malone undue attention, or that she had been making up to him, had upset her more than she wanted to admit. It was an offensive, preposterous suggestion, but it was Sebastian’s manner which had been the worst part. He had been almost aggressive—accusing—and she had given him no reason to be either.
Fleur’s lips set in a tight line. That little episode had been a demonstration of the real Sebastian, she thought with a trace of bitterness. He had obviously felt an unusual lack of control in that particular scenario, and he hadn’t liked it. She shrugged. Well, was she surprised? He fitted perfectly into the mould of men to avoid.
Working up in the top fields with Frank as they stood listing and marking the trees needing attention, Sebastian felt moody and annoyed with himself. He’d deliberately left the house early because he hadn’t wanted to stand there in the drive and wave goodbye to Fleur. And he just didn’t understand that, didn’t understand himself. Didn’t understand the minor agony he was going through.
She was just another female. Yes, she was gorgeous to look at, but he’d met plenty like that, and yes, she was highly intelligent, but his law firm had its fair share of bright females. So what was the big problem? The problem was that he felt thwarted. He had expected her—wanted her—to be staying for several more days and instead she’d gone with barely twenty four hours’ notice. It had seemed to him an unduly hasty departure. Especially as he’d made plans to entertain her—as Mia had asked him to—and he’d looked forward to it. He knew he was being petty-minded and he could kick himself for his feelings, his folly. But, unfortunately for him, he’d been drawn to Fleur—drawn to her like a pin to a magnet—from almost the first moment he’d set eyes on her. He knew he should resist these impulses, because it was safer, in his own best interests to remain emotionally unshackled…wasn’t it? So why wasn’t he pleased that she’d gone? He kicked idly at a clod of earth beneath his boot. The damnable thing was that he knew she wasn’t in the least interested in him—and that only fired his longing to have her, to have his own way. He knew it to be one of the frailties—or strengths—of his character that when anything was denied him he didn’t rest until he’d succeeded in getting it. And now she’d gone and he somehow didn’t think it would be easy to entice her back to Pengarroth Hall.
‘So what do you reckon about this one then, Sebastian?’ Frank asked for the third time, and Sebastian looked back at the man quickly.
‘Sorry, Frank—what did you say?’
‘This one.’ Frank tapped a tree trunk with his stick. ‘I think it should probably come down.’
‘Yes. Yes, I agree,’ Sebastian said vaguely, and the older man stared at him, his shrewd eyes narrowing slightly.
‘What the ’ell were you thinking about just then?’ he asked. ‘You were miles away.’
‘Um…sorry, Frank,’ Sebastian muttered, thinking that he’d been about fifty miles away, which was where she’d be by now.
Much later, back at home, Fleur made herself a large mug of tea and started to unpack. As she pulled everything out of her case, she realized that she’d brought one of Mia’s tracksuit pants with her by mistake.