But she did look heartbreakingly alone.
Lucy had always been alone.
Half an hour later she pushed open the door to her tiny cabana flat and the really bizarre thing was that it looked the same as when she’d left that morning.
It was she who’d changed. Drastically. And she was alone to face it. But then again when hadn’t she been alone to face things? Luckily she had practice at it. The upside was that in about six months’ time she’d never be alone again.
Upside? There was an upside? Where was the anxiety she should be feeling? She’d lived her whole life with that. Trying to do the right thing. She searched her feelings for anger and blame for the life-changing event that had just been confirmed, but she didn’t find any.
Why aren’t I angry with my babies? Didn’t my mother get this feeling I’m feeling now? Almost—no, not almost, definitely—a real connection with her babies. Maybe this was what she was meant to be. A mother.
But twins. Fourteen weeks pregnant was ridiculous. Her first pregnancy was going to be over in twenty-six weeks’ time, because she’d already gone through more than a third of it.
She’d better get her head around it pretty darned quick. Let alone the known fact that twins often came earlier than expected.
She guessed she’d had her official first antenatal visit with the delicious Dr Nick.
She had to snap any of those thoughts out of her brain. Not only had he been there to see her throw up but to hear her whole sordid story of a one-night stand resulting in an unwanted pregnancy. Times two.
She frowned, and her hand crept to her tiny bulge. ‘It’s okay, babies, I do want you now that I know about you, but you could have waited for a more opportune time.’
Lucy rolled her eyes. ‘Like in about ten years, when I’d found a man who wanted to be your father. Preferably after the wedding.’ Someone like Dr Kefes?
She straightened her shoulders and patted her belly. ‘But don’t worry. I’ll give you all the love I never had and there will be no string of uncles staying over. If I don’t meet a one hundred per cent perfect daddy for you, we’ll do this ourselves.’
Her voice died away and she glanced around the empty room. She was going mad already. She’d bet Dr Kefes thought she was mad.
Twenty-two, single and taking on twins instead of the career she’d worked so hard to achieve.
She had almost been able to feel his soothing persona. He’d been very kind. Incredibly supportive considering he didn’t know her. She could understand why women fell a little in love with their obstetricians if they were all like him.
Though she didn’t think there could be a lot of tall, dark and dreamy docs out there with such a delicious hint of a foreign accent.
But at the end of everything, she would be the one holding the babies, and she’d better stop thinking that some demi-god was going to swoop in and lend her a hand.
This was her responsibility and hers alone.
She glanced at the tiny cabana she’d been lucky enough to score in exchange for house-sitting the mansion out front, and she was thankful. Be thankful. She needed to remember that. If the owners decided to sell, something else would turn up. She had to believe that.
And she would find a way to support her babies. She’d just have to save every penny she could until she finished work.
At least she’d get maternity leave—or would she if she was fourteen weeks pregnant on her first day? More things to find out.
But they did have a crèche at the hospital so eventually she’d be able to go back. If Flora May would have her after she told her the news. She put her head in her hands.
And how would she tell her mother?
A kilometre away, Nikolai threw his keys on the hall table inside the door of his flat and pulled off his tie. What a day. And not just with work.
He wasn’t sure why he was so rattled by his encounter with Lucy the midwife, and her news, but he guessed it had to do with the day starting with his sister’s phone call. He’d obviously associated the two women in his mind.
That explained his bizarre feeling of connection with young Lucy. And that was what she was. Young. Barely over twenty, and he was a good ten years older so it had to be an avuncular or older-brother protectiveness. He’d just have to watch it in case she got any ideas.
Because he certainly didn’t have any.
Maybe it hadn’t been so clever to offer to look after her during her pregnancy, but it had seemed right at the time. And he genuinely wanted her to have the best care.
But when the next day at work he only saw Lucy in the distance, she waved once discreetly because both of them were busy with their own workload, and by the end of the day His concerns had seemed foolish.
He wasn’t piqued she hadn’t made any effort to speak to him. Of course not. His concerns were ridiculous. But it seemed he had no worries that she might take liberties with his offer.
Then the day suddenly got busier and Lucy and her problems disappeared into the back of his mind.
The busyness of the ward continued for almost a fortnight, so much so that the staff were counting back in the calendars to see what had happened around this time ten months ago. Solar eclipse? Power blackout?
There was an unofficial competition to see who could come up with the most likely reason for the surge in births.
It was Lucy’s fifth shift in a row and she was finding it harder to get out of bed at six in the morning.
‘Come on, lazybones,’ she grumbled to herself as she sat up on the side of the bed. ‘You’ve got no stamina. You think it’s going to be easier when you’ve got to get two little bodkins organised every three hours for feeds?’
She stood up and rubbed her back. ‘They all say it’s going to get quieter at work again soon. You can do this.’ And she still hadn’t told her mother. She’d told Mark and he’d offered money. And no strings. That was a good thing because she knew in her heart an unwilling Mark wasn’t the answer for either of them. The last thing she wanted was her babies to see her in an unhappy relationship.
When Nikolai saw Lucy he could tell she was starting to feel the frenetic pace. Her usual determined little walk had slowed and he didn’t notice her smile as often.
The next time he saw her he decided she looked far too pale and he couldn’t remember any results from the blood tests he’d ordered a fortnight ago.
He added ‘Follow up with Lucy’ to his list of tasks for the day and tracked her down towards the end of the shift.
‘One moment, Lucy.’
She stopped and smiled tiredly up at him. ‘Yes, Doctor?’
He felt like offering her a chair. Wasn’t anyone looking after this girl? It had been hard enough for him to look after Chloe and he’d been the same age as Lucy was now. And a man, not a slip of a girl.
It was tough making ends meet when you were trying to get through uni and feed yourself. He wondered if she was eating properly before he realised she was waiting for him to finish his sentence.
‘Sorry.’ He glanced around but no one was near them. ‘I wondered why I haven’t seen those results yet.’
Lucy racked her brain. An hour of the shift to go and she was finding it hard not to yawn. Now he wanted results and she had no idea whose he was talking about. For which patient? She frowned. ‘Was I supposed to give you some results?’
‘Yours. Antenatal screening.’ He looked so hard at her she felt like he’d put her under the microscope.
‘You look pale.’
She