“Don’t be hard on yourself. When my sister was Lizzy’s age she was always losing toys. And you left in a hurry.”
“We had things to do.” Relief was tempered by caution. “It was kind of you to drive over. I don’t know how to thank you. You’re obviously busy, so—”
“It calms down around this time. The lull before the storm. Can I come in?”
Only minutes earlier she’d been wishing she wasn’t on her own with this. Now she was wishing the bear’s rescuer had been anyone but him.
She wanted to close the door on all that raw masculinity, but he’d brought the bear and saved her life. She couldn’t be rude to him simply because he made her feel things she didn’t have time to feel right now.
Reluctantly, she opened the door wider. “I’ll give Lizzy the bear.”
She found the little girl exactly where she’d left her, lying listlessly on the sofa, staring at the wall.
“Ryan brought Andrew back.” Dropping to her knees in front of the sofa, Emily tucked the battered bear into Lizzy’s arms. “I promise we’ll never leave him again.”
Lizzy squeezed the bear so tightly Emily was afraid it might lose its head permanently.
Ryan watched from the doorway. “I love a happy ending.” He glanced around the living room. “It’s been a while since I’ve been here. You have no idea how many offers Kathleen had for this piece of land.”
“It doesn’t surprise me. But Brittany will never sell.” She stood up. “Can I fetch you a drink? We haven’t had time to stock up properly yet, but I have juice or soda. Or coffee?”
He followed her into the kitchen and scanned the bags on the table she hadn’t yet unpacked. “That’s not going to keep you going for long.”
“It will do for now.” Pulling milk out of the bag, she stowed it in the fridge. She had a carton of eggs in her hand when he spoke.
“Emily, I know.”
“Sorry?”
He glanced over his shoulder, checking Lizzy was still in the living room. “I know why you ran.”
She forced herself to keep breathing. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“The world is speculating on the whereabouts of Juliet Fox, six-year-old daughter of troubled Hollywood actress Lana Fox who died a month ago in a plane crash along with the man everyone assumes was one of her lovers. Rumor has it the child is staying with a friend or relative in an unknown location.”
The carton of eggs slipped from her fingers and crashed onto the floor, spreading the contents in a sticky mess. “You saw the newspaper.”
“I was looking for a reason for your abrupt departure.”
Trying to think through the panic, she sank onto the nearest chair, ignoring the puddle of eggs congealing on the floor. “I came here because I thought we’d be safe.”
“Safe from what? I assume you’re her guardian.”
“Yes, although as you can see, I’m not the right person for the job.” She gripped her knees until her knuckles were white, and Ryan dropped to his haunches in front of her so they were eye level.
“Why aren’t you the right person?”
“Do you want a list? First, I lose the bear, then, I risk exposing her by taking her out in public. I shouldn’t have said yes to the drink.” There was another reason why she knew she wasn’t the right person, the most important reason of all, but that wasn’t something she intended to share.
“I was the one who invited you for a drink.”
“The responsibility was mine. You didn’t know.”
His eyes were dark velvet, his voice calm. “Are you seriously planning to hide away?”
“What choice do I have? I don’t want the press to know we’re here.” She took a deep breath and tried to steady herself. “I talked to a bunch of people who have been with her since the accident. Lawyers, case workers, grief counselors. My head was spinning, so goodness knows what hers was doing. But the message I took from it all was that she needs to live as normal a life as possible. No media attention. No cameras. It freaks her out. There were great packs of them outside the house. One of them even got inside and cornered her, trying to get information about her mother. He’s the one that scared her the most. Can you believe someone would actually do that? She’s six years old. Six. I have to protect her from that.”
His expression unreadable, he rose to his feet. “They told you her life needs to be as normal as possible. Not going out isn’t normal. A child can’t live her life trapped in a house and neither can you.”
“I think she used to spend a lot of time in her old house, although of course, it was more of a palace than a house, and she had everything she needed within those walls and staff.”
“You think? So you don’t know her that well?”
“I don’t know her at all.” She reasoned that he already knew the part that could hurt them, so revealing detail wouldn’t make a difference.
“Whatever her old life was like, it’s gone. She needs to rebuild a life. And it needs to be a normal life. She doesn’t need staff, she needs security.”
“That’s why I’ve already decided that from now on I’m only leaving the cottage when we need food.”
“I don’t mean that sort of security. I mean the sort that comes from knowing there are people around you who care about you and have your back. You can’t keep her hidden in the cottage, Emily. Both of you will go crazy. She’s a kid. She needs to explore and play. She needs to meet other kids. And what about you? Are you going to spend the next twelve years shut away here with no adult company?”
“I’m planning the next twelve hours. I can’t think further ahead than that.” Twelve years? The thought made her want to hyperventilate. “I’m going to need to make trips into town. She’s too young to be left alone and I don’t have anyone here I can trust.”
“Hey, let’s take this a step at a time.” He sat down in the chair opposite her. “This is why Brittany said you were panicking.”
There was much more to her panic and feelings of inadequacy than her ability to keep Lizzy’s identity a secret. Eventually, she knew, media attention would move to other things, other lives, but she’d still be the child’s guardian, and she knew she wasn’t equipped for that monumental task. “When I told her what happened, she suggested I use the cottage. Kathleen left it to Brittany because she wanted her to have somewhere that was hers, somewhere she could go when life was tough. On our last day together at college Brittany gave us both a key.”
“You and Skylar?”
“Yes. She said Kathleen would have wanted it. We were moving to different sides of the country. In Brittany’s case, to a different continent half the time. It was somewhere we could come if we ever needed it.”
“And you needed it.”
“It seemed like a perfect place to hide while I worked out what to do.”
For Lizzy it was perfect. For her, it was a nightmare. The crash of the waves kept her awake, churning up memories like the ocean churned sand on the seabed.
“What’s your connection to Lana Fox?”
Emily was filled with a ridiculous desire to lean on all that hard strength, an impulse that made no sense because she’d been taking care of herself since she was younger than Lizzy.
“She was my sister.” She saw his expression shift from concern to surprise. “I hadn’t seen Lana since I left to go to college, and I