Unravel Me. Kendall Ryan

lick spicy peanut sauce from his lips. I felt lighter in his presence, incredibly alive and carefree, something that was rare for me since most of my days were spent worrying about my mounting student-loan debt, the endless research papers that needed writing, and even my dad who was all alone back in Michigan. At least tonight the alcohol left me with a fuzzy buzz and I could daydream about Logan on my walk home.

      I passed by the small park I often sat in to read or study. It was little more than a cluster of trees and some park benches, but in the heart of downtown, you couldn’t be too picky with green spaces.

      The evening air was cool and felt great against my overheated skin and the nearly full moon made it a beautiful night. It would have been a nice night to walk home, if it weren’t for these blasted shoes. I stopped to lean against a lamppost and removed my heels.

      A policeman prodding a homeless man on a park bench caught my attention. The man sat up, and rubbed his hands across his face. It was the same mannerism Logan used when he was tired or frustrated. It had to be a guy thing. But then the streetlight caught on his bicep and a tattoo…. Logan.

      It couldn’t be. Yet I found myself jogging toward them all the same, heels dangling from my hand.

      The police officer had roused the man onto his feet and was urging him along. Like a slap to the face, it hit me that this was indeed Logan. I didn’t understand how or why he’d been released, but there he stood, in my neighborhood park in the middle of the night.

      ‘Logan!’ I called.

      He turned suddenly, his gaze locking with mine. He looked tired, weary and untrusting. My heart sank. There wasn’t even a question; I had let him down by not coming today. Had he snuck out to see me? Why did that thought make me deliriously happy? Sick, Ashlyn, sick. I was becoming obsessed with him and Liz was right, it wasn’t healthy. But seeing Logan here, the feelings he roused within me, I just didn’t care. I needed to see him.

      I jogged the last few paces and stopped in front of him. He didn’t greet me with his customary hug, but instead stood coolly observing me. A pang of regret flared up inside my chest. I shouldn’t have ditched him to hang out with Liz tonight. Especially when she was ditching me for guy right now.

      The police officer cleared his throat. ‘You know him?’

      ‘Yes, I know him,’ I said, without taking my eyes from Logan’s. His gaze softened just the slightest bit.

      ‘Just move it along, folks. No sleeping in the park.’

      ‘No problem, officer.’ I nodded, not breaking eye contact with Logan.

      A moment later the cop turned and left, leaving us alone in the dark, silent park.

      Seeing him outside the hospital was throwing me off more than I cared to admit, like he only existed within the walls of that tiny hospital room. ‘What are you doing out here?’

      Logan rubbed a hand across the back of his neck, looking down at the ground. ‘They dropped the charges against me today. And then you didn’t come…’

      ‘I’m sorry,’ I interrupted. I knew from overhearing hallway conversations in the hospital there was no case against him.

      ‘And since they couldn’t legally hold me in the hospital anymore, I signed myself out.’

      ‘Oh.’ Oh was all I could come up with. He’d chosen to be homeless rather than stay another night in the hospital. It didn’t make any sense. ‘Well, do you have anywhere to go?’ I reached for his forearm and he stepped back, out of my reach.

      ‘I’ll be fine, Ashlyn. You got what you wanted for your paper. I heard Dr. Andrews say something about your thesis being nearly finished. I figured that was why you didn’t come back today. You’re free to go on with your life. Forget about me. Everyone else has,’ he added under his breath.

      I stepped in closer, placing my palm on his cheek. ‘No, Logan. You’ve got it wrong. My paper’s been done for several days. I couldn’t come tonight, but I left a message for you with the hospital staff.’

      He raised his eyebrows, like he was deciding if he should believe me. ‘I never got a message.’

      ‘I’m sorry, but I didn’t ditch you. Come back to my apartment for the night. We can figure things out in the morning.’

      He removed my hand from his cheek, lowering it to my side. ‘I don’t want your pity, Ashlyn.’

      ‘Logan, we both know there’s something between us. This isn’t pity. Please come with me. You need somewhere to sleep tonight. Let me be there for you.’ Those last words seemed to soften him, because he closed his eyes for a moment then nodded.

      ‘Okay. If you’re sure it’s no trouble.’

      I looked at the ground, my throat tight, and my stomach a bundle of nerves. ‘I promise it’s no trouble.’

      I led Logan the few blocks to my building in silence, while the tension rolled off him in waves. I hated that he thought I’d abandoned him once I got what I needed for my paper. Couldn’t he see that it was so much more than that for me? We walked up to the third floor, which I’d grown used to and no longer left me winded. I unlocked the door, and grimaced when I remembered the state of my apartment and Liz’s warning about bringing a man home tonight. Who could have known she’d be right and that it’d be Logan? It seemed impossible, but he really was here, stepping inside my crowded one-bedroom apartment, his large frame making it look even smaller than it was.

      I flicked on the foyer light, illuminating the crazy mess that was my apartment. ‘Home sweet home,’ I murmured, tossing my keys onto the side table.