‘Who plays Mercutio?’ I wanted to know. ‘Who plays Tybalt? It’s set in modern times? Really! Hmmm… I wonder if that will work,’ and so on.
Our discussion continued until we arrived at Spy. As everyone else piled out of the cab, Leonardo DiWho surprised me. He stayed inside and started asking me questions about what it’s like to be a taxi driver.
Now, this impressed me – a lot. It brought to mind the difference between interesting versus interested. I don’t think there’s anything wrong about trying to be interesting, but I think it’s more admirable by far to be interested. For one thing, being interested makes you smarter. You will learn things by being interested. And, in addition to that, being interested gives the people you are talking to the feeling that they are important and that you care about them. It bolsters their self-esteem and makes them stronger. In my opinion, simply being interested is one of humanity’s most noble virtues. It doesn’t have to be a dog eat dog world.
So here was this kid smoking a cigar, a movie star, who you might expect to be the epitome of being interesting, instead turning the tables and being interested. What a breath of fresh air.
‘Who was the biggest celebrity tipper you ever had in your cab?’ he asked me.
‘Believe it or not, it was John McEnroe,’ I replied. ‘He gave me double the meter.’
‘Well,’ Leonardo DiWho said, ‘I’m gonna give you triple the meter!’
And he did.
I had a feeling this kid was going places and I didn’t want to forget his name, so I wrote it down on my trip sheet. My daughter, Suzy, was fourteen at the time and I’d never once been able to impress her by dropping the names of any of the celebrities I’ve had in my cab. Nevertheless, when I saw Suzy the next day, I told her I had a celebrity in my cab the previous night.
Looking down at my trip sheet, I read the name with some difficulty.
‘Have you ever heard of this guy… Leonardo… Di… uh… Cap… rio?’
A shriek came out of the mouth of my daughter that nearly shattered the wine glasses in the cabinet. This was followed by moans of the deepest anguish when it was learned that I had failed to obtain his autograph, a sin for which I have never been forgiven.
Oh, yes. She knew who he was.
Another question I’m frequently asked is, ‘How many celebrities have you had in your cab?’ I’ve wondered about this myself, so I made a list of every celebrity, big or small, I could think of who’d ever climbed into the back seat. By ‘big’ I mean a major star, like Leonardo DiCaprio. ‘Small’ would be someone who is known only locally, like a radio DJ or broadcast news personality.
The grand total, as of this writing, is 114. Some of these celebrities I’ve had more than once (Dick Clark – three times!), so if I counted each time that happened the total would be 122. And if I were able to count the ones I didn’t recognize, I’m sure the number would be God knows how many. But however you look at it, it’s a lot of celebs. So many, in fact, that it lends itself to categorization. Here are some of the stand outs:
Movie Stars – 17 – Lauren Bacall, Sean Penn, Dennis Hopper, Jane Seymour, Richard Dreyfuss, Robin Williams, Matt Dillon, Dan Aykroyd, Eli Wallach, Kevin Kline, Bill Pullman, Diane Keaton, Carroll O’Connor, Kevin Bacon, Tom Hulce, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr and, of course, Leo.
Pop Music Stars – 9 – Ray Davies (The Kinks), Johnny Rzeznik (Goo Goo Dolls), Paul Simon, Art Garfunkel, Carly Simon, Diahann Carroll, Gregg Allman, Derek Trucks, James Taylor.
Crooners – 3 – Tony Bennett, Frank Sinatra, Jr, Eddie Fisher.
Folk Singers – 3 – Peter Yarrow (Peter, Paul and Mary), Suzanne Vega, Richie Havens.
Famous Writers – 5 – Norman Mailer, Jimmy Breslin, Harrison Salisbury, Rex Reed, Liz Smith.
Offspring of Celebrities Who Are Celebrities Themselves – 4 – Caroline Kennedy, Lucie Arnez, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr, Steven Mailer (son of Norman).
Talk Show Hosts – 3 – Dick Cavett, David Susskind, Tom Snyder.
Band Leaders of Late-Night Talk Shows – 2 – Paul Schaeffer (Letterman), Max Weinberg (Conan O’Brian).
Big-Time Businessmen Who Named Their Companies After Themselves – 2 – Leon Hess (Hess Oil and owner of the NY Jets football team), Frank (‘it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken’) Purdue.Writers of Famous Christmas Songs – 2 – Mel Tormé (‘The Christmas Song’, aka ‘Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire’), J. Fred Coots (‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’).
Porn Stars – 3 – Hyapatia Lee, Sharon Mitchell, Cara Lott.
Mick Jagger Exes – 2 – Marianne Faithfull, Bianca Jagger.
Fugitive Hippies – 1 – Abbie Hoffman.
That’s right. I had a famous fugitive hippie in my cab, and there aren’t too many of those around. Or perhaps I should say a ‘former’ fugitive hippie…
Abbie Hoffman
I was cruising up 8th Avenue one night in February, 1982, when I was hailed by two men on the street. One was a normal-looking, forty-something fellow and the other turned out to be a dark-haired, raving motormouth who spoke to his traveling companion in a semi-hysterical rant without giving him a chance to get a word in edgewise. We continued up 8th Avenue to Central Park West until we reached 65th Street, where the man with the obsessive outflow got out of the cab, leaving the other passenger with me. I turned right onto transverse and we proceeded across the park to the East Side.
‘That was Abbie Hoffman,’ the man said. ‘I’m his parole officer.’
Abbie Hoffman, if you’re too young to remember him, was an iconic counter-culture figure from the ’60s. He founded the Youth International Party (the “Yippies”) and received vast amounts of publicity by engineering stunts and demonstrations which mocked some of the dubious values of American society. He had been convicted of dealing cocaine in 1973 and became a fugitive until 1980, when he re-emerged and served a brief prison term.
It was a surprise and something of a revelation to be able to be a ‘fly on the wall’ during this ride. A surprise because Abbie Hoffman had seemed to me to be something of a folk legend, more like a Johnny Appleseed or a Paul Bunyon than a real person. Yet there he was.
And a revelation to observe the condition he was actually in. I was saddened but not altogether surprised several years later to learn that he had committed suicide.
However, it is another iconic personage from the ’60s (and beyond) who is the answer to this frequently asked question: ‘Of all the celebrities you’ve had in your cab, which one is your favorite?’
Paul Simon’s warmth
On two occasions I have been honored to transport the derriere of the great Paul Simon in my taxicab. The composer of ‘Bridge Over Troubled Water’, ‘Mrs, Robinson’, ‘The Boxer’ and so many other wonderful songs, Paul Simon is someone who I can truly say has enriched my life through his music. It can be a little overwhelming, however, to meet someone in person whom you have admired for so long. What do you say to a living legend? What, when you find yourself suddenly face to face with such a larger-than-life character, do you talk about?
Why, baseball, of course.
I was heading uptown on Central Park West on a lovely day in June, 1983, looking for my next passenger, when I spotted him standing there with a doorman on the opposite side of the street. They