“I have a system.” Paddy gave me a defensive glare and I shook my head.
“And I have nine lives like a cat. My ass, you have a system,” I sneered and something pounded the desktop. Possibly his fist.
“This is not the Stanzie Newcastle I remember,” he muttered. “Step one foot on Irish soil, and it’s like a fucking banshee possessed you.”
I settled back in the armchair.
“So where is he? Murphy?” My voice was casual, but I didn’t fool either of us. I thought of Faith’s dream again and wanted to beg the man to tell me Murphy wasn’t in over his head, but I had to play it just a little cooler than that. If I could. Subtlety was not one of my better talents.
“No,” he decided. “We are not having this conversation until after you eat and after I drink copious amounts of beer. Not gonna happen.”
“I know he’s giving everyone in the pack the impression I walked out on him. Or maybe that was you,” I accused and Paddy’s mouth fell open.
“Me?” he bellowed. “I’m not in the habit of blabbing pack members’ private business all over the place.”
“Fine. It was him, then.” I tried to keep the hurt out of my voice but I knew I failed. “That red-haired giant hurt my feelings,” I yelled. “I wasn’t in half so bad a mood before he treated me like shit and talked about the pub being fucking private.”
“I told you I’m gonna kick his ass. Why do you have to take it out on me?” Paddy shouted.
“I’m also mad as hell at you! Worse than I am at the giant!”
“His name is Colm, damn it,” snapped Paddy. “And why the hell should you be mad at me?”
My blood pressure zoomed again at his treachery.
“You said I was family. After my father disowned me at the tribunal, you took me aside and told me I didn’t need him because I had a family. You. Mac Tire. You fucking lied to my face, Paddy, and what’s worse, I believed you. I believed in you. And then you just walked away. You couldn’t even look me straight in the eye the day you and Murphy left. And in four months not a phone call or an email to see if I was okay. Nothing. Not one goddamn thing.”
“Fuck.” Guilt spread across Paddy’s face, but I was unmoved. Then the guilt turned to anger, and he yelled, “And why the fuck has it taken you four months to get your ass over here anyway? I didn’t think it would take you even four days, but no, you’ve got to be a bitch about it!”
“Me? A bitch? What?” I spluttered, unable to form a coherent sentence due to the rage strangling me.
“You heard me. You sat there and didn’t say one word when he said he was leaving, and how the hell do you think that made him feel? Like complete shite, that’s how it made him feel. And here I am, having to pick up the pieces for you, and now you have the gall to be mad at me, woman? I’m the one who should be mad, and I am. I am good and frigging mad, so don’t you glare at me like that. You tell me what the hell took you so long to get here.”
“He left me,” I screamed. Rage burned up and down my spine and all through my blood until I thought I might spontaneously combust. “How many times do I have to keep telling people that? Why is everyone blaming me? He walked out on me, and I’m supposed to come crawling after him to beg him to take me back? Fuck you! Oh, you arrogant bastard, I cannot even believe you!”
“Where in the hell did you hear me say the word crawl? Stanzie Newcastle, will you calm your ass down and shut the fuck up for one minute? I can’t even hear myself think.” Paddy tore at his hair with his hands, and his cheeks were so red I thought he was close to combustion too.
Affronted, I turned away from him and stared at the damn brick wall. He wanted me to shut the fuck up, did he? Fine. I would not say a word.
The office door banged open, and the redhead from behind the bar walked in with a tray of food and Guinness. My stomach rumbled, and she flashed me a smile I didn’t trust an inch. Too many teeth.
“I’m Alannah Doyle,” she introduced herself as she set the tray down on Paddy’s desk. “My bond mate’s Declan Byrne.”
“Constance Newcastle.” I took a deep breath. “At the moment, anyway, my bond mate is Liam Murphy.” I wanted to throw up or crawl beneath the sofa, but I managed to look her in the face, braced for pity or ridicule.
“What took you so long to get here?” she demanded, hands on hips.
“Thank you,” Paddy yelled rudely.
“Does this shit happen all the time in Mac Tire? People walk out on other people, and other people chase after them, even though they were the ones that were walked out on?” My tone was snotty, but, honestly, what the fuck?
“For three years every eligible female in this pack and some not so eligible chased after Liam, and he spurned us all. So forgive me, woman, for being a bit pissed the female he finally does choose deserts his ass at the first sign of trouble. It’s been a terrible thing to watch him these past few months. At least after Sorcha died we didn’t have to see him because he ran away to Belfast, of all fucking stupid places, and we weren’t constantly exposed to his sad, pitiful face day after day. Has the man smiled even once in four months, Paddy?” Alannah turned to him, and he looked up guiltily from his Guinness and swallowed the wrong way.
“Stop drinking that and participate in this discussion. It’s important.” Alannah stomped a small foot on the wooden floor, but by the way Paddy cringed I would have expected her to be an Amazon or at least brandishing a weapon.
More and more it seemed my interpretation of Faith’s dream was dead-on. Paddy needed my help with Murphy. Only, was I the one who could give it? That man never took anybody’s help—why the hell would he take mine?
“How many goddamn times do I have to say that I am the one who was deserted, not the other fucking way around?” I wanted to get up and kick her pretty face in but somehow controlled myself.
The look of scorn she directed at me could have stripped paint.
“What are you doing here, then?”
I didn’t say anything, and she blew out her breath in impatience. “You silly cow. Why can’t you admit you want him back? Bloody stupid, prideful Americans. You get on my nerves.”
“Did you—you did not just call me a cow.” My face heated. I turned in Paddy’s direction. “Did that bitch just call me a cow?”
“Jaysus, I want to eat dinner in peace. Woman, get your ass back to the bar. You’re the one who wanted the job, didn’t you? Begged me for it, in fact. And now you’ve got the job, what do you do? Stand around in my office, badgering poor Stanzie. If she doesn’t want to answer you, she doesn’t have to. Why should she tell us her strategy anyway? You’re gonna spoil all the fun we’ll have watching her.”
“I did not beg you for this job.” Alannah tossed her red hair as she moved for the door. “Declan fucked Fee for it, you bastard.”
I waited until the door was shut before I said anything. Spoil the fun, would she?
“You made her bond mate fuck yours so she could have a job behind the bar? Oh my God.” He ducked when I threw my boot at his head.
“Stanzie. It was a joke! The stupid kind between brother and sister? Alannah’s my half sister, for Christ’s sake. Her ma was bonded to my ma and da.”
“She introduces herself as Declan Byrne’s bond mate but conveniently leaves out the part where she’s your sister? Unbelievable. And rude. And you didn’t say anything either, you bastard.” He ducked again when I threw my second