Killer Blonde. Laura Levine. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Laura Levine
Издательство: Ingram
Серия: A Jaine Austen Mystery
Жанр произведения: Ужасы и Мистика
Год издания: 0
isbn: 9780758265111
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      DEATH BY BUBBLE BATH

      “But you can’t quit,” Heidi said. “When will I see you?”

      “We can meet after school.”

      “What happens when you get another job?”

      She had me there.

      “Can’t you stay a little while longer, until I get used to this ‘stick up for myself’ thing?”

      The thought of one more day on that toilet bowl made me cringe, but Heidi looked so vulnerable, I couldn’t say no.

      “Okay,” I sighed. “But just for a few more weeks.”

      As it turned out, I didn’t even have to stay a few more hours. Because when I walked into the bathroom to report for work, the first thing I saw was SueEllen floating face down in the bathtub.

      “SueEllen?” I called out, hoping maybe she was doing some new age water aerobics.

      But she didn’t answer.

      At first I thought it was an accident; maybe SueEllen slipped in the tub. But then I saw something floating alongside SueEllen’s loofa sponge and triple-milled French soap: A hair dryer. Plugged into an electrical outlet.

      SueEllen had been electrocuted!

      I managed to keep my cool for a whole three and a half seconds. After which I went screaming down the hallways like an extra in Nightmare on Elm Street….

      Books by Laura Levine

      THIS PEN FOR HIRE

      LAST WRITES

      KILLER BLONDE

      SHOES TO DIE FOR

      THE PMS MURDER

      Published by Kensington Publishing Corporation

      A Jaine Austen Mystery

      Killer Blonde

      Laura Levine

      KENSINGTON BOOKS

      KENSINGTON PUBLISHING CORP.

       http://www.kensingtonbooks.com

      For Mark

      ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

      Many thanks to my editor, John Scognamiglio, for believing in Jaine Austen—and for thinking up such a nifty title. To my agent, Evan Marshall, for being such a good listener and advice-giver extraordinaire. Thanks also to Joanne Fluke, author of the deliciously clever Hannah Swensen mysteries, for her much-appreciated generosity. And to Carlos Marrero for his terrific cover art. A special thanks to my family and friends, for their love and support. And, finally, because I know he’ll be impossible to live with if I don’t mention him, thanks to the cat in my life, Mr. Guy.

      Contents

      Prologue

      Chapter One

      Chapter Two

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Three

      Chapter Four

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Five

      Chapter Six

      Chapter Seven

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Eight

      Chapter Nine

      Chapter Ten

      Chapter Eleven

      Chapter Twelve

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Thirteen

      Chapter Fourteen

      Chapter Fifteen

      Chapter Sixteen

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Seventeen

      Chapter Eighteen

      Chapter Nineteen

      Chapter Twenty

      Chapter Twenty-One

      Chapter Twenty-Two

      You’ve Got Mail!

      Chapter Twenty-Three

      Chapter Twenty-Four

      Chapter Twenty-Five

      Epilogue

      KENSINGTON BOOKS are published by

      Kensington Publishing Corp.

      119 West 40th Street

      New York, NY 10018

      Copyright © 2004 by Laura Levine

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

      If you purchased this book without a cover you should be aware that this book is stolen property. It was reported as “unsold and destroyed” to the Publisher and neither the Author nor the Publisher has received any payment for this “stripped book.”

      All Kensington titles, imprints and distributed lines are available at special quantity discounts for bulk purchases for sales promotion, premiums, fund-raising, educational or institutional use.

      Special book excerpts or customized printings can also be created to fit specific needs. For details, write or phone the office of the Kensington Special Sales Manager: Kensington Publishing Corp., 850 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10022. Attn. Special Sales Department. Phone: 1-800-221-2647.

      Kensington and the K logo Reg. U.S. Pat. & TM Off.

      ISBN 13: 978-1-4967-2575-2

      ISBN 10: 1-4967-257-1

      eISBN 13: 978-0-7582-6511-1

      eISBN 10: 0-7582-6511-5

      First Hardcover Printing: July 2004

      First Mass Market Paperback Printing: May 2005

      Printed in the United States of America

      Prologue

      My name is Jaine, and I’m a bathaholic.

      Yes, it’s true. I like nothing better than to tear off my clothes in the middle of the afternoon and leap into a hot bubble bath. So it’s lucky I’m a freelance writer. While other working stiffs are trapped in offices, chained to their computers, I can hop into the tub any time I please.

      Which is what I was doing the day SueEllen Kingsley first called me. I’d just finished writing a slogan for a new client, Tip Top Dry Cleaners (We’ll clean for you. We’ll press for you. We’ll even dye for you.), and I was relaxing in a marvelous haze of strawberry-scented bubbles. The mirrors were fogged over. The radio, if I remember correctly, was playing a soulful Diana Krall love song. And my cat Prozac was perched on top of the toilet tank, licking her privates, visions of fish guts dancing in her head.

      It was one of those blissful moments I often experience after I’ve finished a writing assignment, basking in the glow of a job well done (or done, anyway), until it dawns on me that now that the assignment is over, I’m out of work again.

      I was still in the bask-in-the-glow stage when the phone rang. I let the machine get it.

      “Ms. Austen.” A syrupy, southern-accented voice drifted out from the machine. “SueEllen Kingsley here. I saw your ad in the Yellow Pages—”