“I simply encountered a man that…um…held my attention.”
“Why did he captivate you?”
Helena shifted, heat touching her cheeks just from talking about him. It was somehow exposing to hear Raelin using a word such as captivate. The girl didn’t know how correct she was.
“It wasn’t that intense.”
“Aye, it was. You didna see yer own face. I did.” Raelin eyed her suspiciously. “Why are you squirming if it wasn’t that intense? We cannae be true friends if you want to be deceptive in private.”
Helena sighed. “You are very persistent.”
Her friend smiled in triumph but there was a flicker of compassion in her eyes. “I’m not toying with you, truly. It is just that there are so many who pretend friendship to sit here near the queen. You seem different. I am hoping that ye are. Serving the queen can be very lonely.”
“I understand what you mean. Ever since I have arrived at court there have been many who wanted to be near me in order to flirt with my brother. They covet his impending inheritance and seem to have no qualms about pretending friendship to me to try their charms on him. It does indeed become very lonely.”
Raelin nodded her head. “You do understand. I’m glad. So very glad.” Her voice trailed off as though she was afraid to allow her emotions to be exposed. There was a camaraderie in the moment, one that Helena was hungry for, too. Raelin filled an empty space in her soul and she was grateful.
Raelin reached out and slapped her arm lightly. “So tell me about him. Were ye unable to look away like the poets say?”
“I couldn’t seem to stop looking at him. My eyes were drawn to him, like the only candle in a pitch-dark room. Honestly, it’s as if I didn’t have any control over what I was thinking. His face keeps pushing its way to the front of my thoughts. I can’t seem to banish it.”
“What drew ye to him?”
Raelin sat poised, waiting to hear the answer.
What indeed…
“Something in his eyes…I don’t really understand it myself.” She wished she did. It would make it far easier to block his face from her mind. Too many times today he’d appeared in her thoughts, stealing her attention away from whatever she was doing. Such a fascination was bound to lead her toward despair.
Raelin sighed.
“It’s nothing to be envious of. My brother was quite angry.”
“Your brother noticed?”
Helena looked down at the broach. Raelin covered it with her polishing cloth.
“You cannae stop now. Tell me the rest.”
Lifting her face, she stared at her friend. “He tried to kiss my hand but Edmund sent me off to join you. My brother was quite rude.”
“And what did the man do?”
What did he do, indeed? What sounded so innocent held her over a flame that licked her body….
Helena felt the heat from her blush spread. It flowed down into her body, across the sensitive skin of her breasts and all the way to the tips of her nipples. Raelin slapped her hand, jerking her out of the moment.
“He followed me. Into the hallway. To place the kiss on my hand that Edmund refused him. My brother’s position didn’t appear to worry him at all. He claimed that I challenged him.” Helena let out a slow breath. “Are all Scotsmen that persistent?”
“He was Scots?”
Helena nodded. “He wore a kilt and bonnet. No lace or high fashion at all. Only a doublet and a large sword strapped to his back.”
“Och now, if he said ye challenged him, ye’d best prepare to deal with him again. My countrymen are never timid when it comes to a lass who has captured their interest.”
“My brother will be quite angry with me over it if he notices me daydreaming. That is nothing to be envious of.”
Her friend shrugged once again. “I quite disagree. Never once have I met a man that did that to me. I can ignore them all at my pleasure and they can do the same to me.” Raelin spread her hands out wide. “Which leaves me lonely and begging to hear about yer good fortune. I am truly a pathetic creature.”
Helena frowned. “You shouldn’t say things like that. I should have better discipline.” She shivered, the topic shooting a chill down her spine again. “I need to stop thinking about him. That is why I didn’t want to tell you. I can’t continue to dwell on him.”
“But it’s wonderful to find a man who does that to you. Maybe ye’ll fall in love with him.”
Helena recoiled from the look of bright hope in Raelin’s eyes. “That will gain me naught but a broken heart.”
“Or a spring wedding to a man ye’re eager to share yer bed with.”
Helena laughed. The sound was too loud, drawing looks from the queen’s ladies. Raised eyebrows that critiqued them from where they sat at the other end of the chamber. Her fingers began moving over the broach once more.
“All it will get me is a broken heart. Affection is no reason to marry. I’ll cry on my wedding night because of who my family weds me to. Edmund would never allow a match with him.” She’d been taught to think that way, but today for the first time she questioned it. She had never believed that a look could make her blush. Never even considered that such a thing truly happened.
Or that one kiss, against so innocent a place, might be so moving. Yet it had happened. She could still feel the pulse of excitement lingering in her blood. It was far more potent than any wine. The delicate skin on her inner wrist tingled with renewed longing for another touch from those warm lips.
“That is a shame. Ye should be happy on your wedding night.” Raelin replaced the earring she’d been cleaning and took up the matching one.
“You sound as though you have some say in who you wed.” That was ridiculous, but there was something in Raelin’s tone that implied it. “Is that allowed in Scotland? A lady having say in who she marries? Even if that choice is not a man with a title?”
“My brother would listen to me, if I told him someone had taken my fancy.”
“Now I am jealous.” And it sounded too good to be true. But they were in England. That harsh truth sliced through her excitement. Even if things were different in Scotland, she had been born English.
Raelin smiled. “Will you show him to me?”
“I don’t even know the man’s name. Much less where to begin looking for him.”
“If he’s here, he’s waiting to see the king. We’ll begin in the great hall.”
Raelin took the broach from her hands and set it back inside the open chest of the queen’s jewels. They were all clean anyway. But the ladies-in-waiting often dictated chores to the maids of honor and there was no arguing permitted.
Raelin grasped her hand and took a look across the chamber before pulling Helena off her bench. The queen was in her bedchamber and her ladies with her. She tired easily now and was retiring for the night. But the queen was also particular. She’d felt pressed upon and wanted only her ladies near. Chores had been handed out to the maids to take them away from the bedchamber. No one was left in the outer chamber except the pair of them.
“If I see his kilt, I can tell you what clan he’s from. Maybe even if he holds a title. We have nobles in Scotland, too, ye know.” Her friend offered her a bright smile. “No one will miss us. Not now that the queen has begun to retire.”
“You are a conspirator.” But she was tempted. She wanted to know his name.
Raelin