Band Fags!. Frank Anthony Polito

do with you?”

      To which I say nothing.

      On the off chance that Brad’s right and Audrey does have a crush on me, I’d hate to lead her on. I mean, it’s not that I don’t like her. I just don’t like her-like her. In that way.

      I’m about to start off when Audrey stops me. “Where’s my hug?”

      Suddenly, I’m engulfed in a sea of Suave strawberries. I have no other choice but to return her embrace. Though not too enthusiastically. Again, no leading the Poor Girl on.

      “I’m so glad we’re friends,” she says softly in my ear.

      Again, I say nothing.

      Audrey kisses me on the cheek. Like she used to back in Kindergarten during Free Time. “Call me tomorrow,” she orders. “Make it sooner than later.”

      Which reminds me…

      With thoughts of Rex Smith and Denise Miller, I free myself from Audrey’s embrace. Then I sprint down the block, arriving home just in time to turn on WKBD-TV, stick a blank VHS tape in the old VCR, and hit REC.

      The sound of applause fills my ears as Michael Skye takes to the Shopping Mall stage before the cheering crowd of late-’70s teenagers. And who do I see sporting a shoulder-length crimped hairdo complete with topknot, singing backup and playing tambourine? None other than Fran from The Great Space Coaster… I had no idea she was really an actor!

      So what if the song Rex Smith is singing sounds kind of cheesy? So what if he’s poured himself into these totally tight Jordache jeans with these ridiculous looking suspenders? So what if his white T-shirt sparkles with silver glitter, the words The Skye Band printed in funky late-’70s style script? It’s really him…After all these years!

      “Good things come to those who wait.”