The Hum. Ralph Anderson

to not give the principal any satisfaction that his message is getting through.

      “Do you have anything to say for yourselves?”

      After some time there is no response.

      “I want you both to take some time to think about your future. Whether you want to stay here or get expelled... Think about it… I’ve called you parents to come pick you up. They’ll be here at 11:30. I am putting you on a one week suspension… Wait for your parents on the bench in the hall.”

      They don’t move.

      “Go! Now!”

      The two boys get up and shuffle out of the office snickering as they go.

      The principal sits quietly contemplating the two boys, his hands folded, index fingers pointing up, tapping his mouth. The principal gives a big sigh and reaches for the phone on his desk and dials. In a few moments there is an answer.

      “I just had a couple of boys in my office that I believe fit your profile and would be good for the program. Their names are…”

      9

      1979, Bristol England.

      Arthur Palmer, Member of Parliament, is standing on the steps of city hall giving a press conference. “In light of two recent suicides and the hundreds of complaints from my constituents of a mysterious humming sound in the Bristol area that is has caused people to loose sleep and has had some severe health consequences among the population of Bristol, I took it upon myself to discover the cause. I have been working closely with the city council and members of the special scientific investigative committee sent from Chelsea College. We have had numerous meetings and have toured the city at night, since most of the complaints have been at night, to find the source of “The Hum” as local residents refer to it. We have looked into every possibility and I want to announce that the source of “The Hum” has been found and eliminated. Tomorrow I will request that the British government cancel its grant to the Hum committee of Chelsea College and to thank them for their brilliant scientific detective work. The case is closed.”

      There are many shouts of questions from reporters. One question gets through. “Can you tell us the source of the hum?”

      It is an awkward moment as Mr. Palmer hesitates uncomfortably, smiles and says, “I cannot reveal the source. The Hum has been stopped. Everyone should be satisfied with that.” He starts to walk off.

      Again the reporter, “Why won’t you tell us the source?”

      Palmer turns sharply to address the reporter, “What difference does it make? It’s over.”

      Repeated attempts by the press to get the city council, Chelsea College, Mr. Palmer and the British government to expose the source of the hum were stonewalled. A media campaign of ridicule was showered upon hum sufferers persistent complaints.

      The Bristol hum continues to this day.