Neither Wolf Nor Dog. Kent Nerburn. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Kent Nerburn
Издательство: Ingram
Серия: Canons
Жанр произведения: Биографии и Мемуары
Год издания: 0
isbn: 9781786890184
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us except that it scared the animals and that these people did not know what was sacred. But we knew they had to eat, so we did not mind when they shot the buffalo.

      “I have heard that it was the same for other tribes with other animals. They tried to help these people. They were worried that the animals for the hunt would be scared away. But these people brought guns and that made hunting easier for us. So we did not mind.

      “But then these strangers shot animals just to kill them. They left them lying in gullies. They made paths through the lands that were heavier than our paths. These people became like a river through the land.

      “We had never seen the kind of things they did. For us, the earth was alive. To move a stone was to change her. To kill an animal was to take from her. There had to be respect. We saw no respect from these people. They chopped down trees and left animals lay where they were shot. They made loud noises. They seemed like wild people. They were heavy on the land and they were loud. We could hear their wagon wheels groaning in the next valley.

      “We tried to stay out of their way. But they made us angry. They made hunting hard for us. They took food from our children’s mouths. We did not want them around. Still, they were on small paths and we were free. We tried to leave them alone, except for the young men who were most angry.

      “And we did want their rifles.

      “Then something strange happened. These new people started asking us for the land. We did not know what to say. How could they ask for the land? They wanted to give us money for the land. They would give us money for the land if their people could live on it.

      “Our people didn’t want this. There was something wrong to the Creator in taking money for the land. There was something wrong to our grandparents and our ancestors to take money for the land.

      “Then something happened that we didn’t understand. The people who came said that we didn’t belong here anymore. That there was a chief in Washington, which was a city far away, and the land was his, and he had said they could live here and we could not.

      “We thought they were insane. The elders said to be careful because these people were dangerous. Most of us just laughed — at least this is what the elders told me when I was young. These people would ride across the land and put a flag up, then say that everything between where they started and where they put the flag belonged to them. That was like someone rowing a boat out into a lake and saying that all the water from where he started to where he turned around belonged to him. Or someone shooting an arrow into the sky and saying that all the sky up to where the arrow went belonged to him.

      “This is very important for you to understand. We thought these people were crazy. We thought we must not understand them right. What they said made no sense.

      “And here is what was really happening. They were talking about property. We were talking about the land. Do you see what I mean? Your people came from Europe because they wanted property for their own. That was what they needed to farm and raise the food to live. They had worked for other people who had claimed all the property and took all the things they raised. They never had anything because they had no property. That was what they wanted more than anything. That is what was behind the whole idea of America as a new country across the ocean. To get property of their own.

      “I don’t know. Maybe long, long ago, Europe was just land, too, like this land was for us. But that was so long ago that no one remembered. It had all been turned into property. If people didn’t have property they didn’t have very much control over their lives, because everyone believed that whoever had a piece of paper saying they owned the land could control everything that happened on it. The people that came across the ocean believed this, too. They came here to get their own property.

      “We didn’t know this. We didn’t even know what it meant. We just belonged to the land. They wanted to own it.

      “And here is something that I think is important — your religion didn’t come from the land. It could be carried around with you. You couldn’t understand what it meant to us to have our religion in the land. Your religion was in a cup and a piece of bread, and that could be carried in a box. Your priests could make it sacred anywhere. You couldn’t understand that what was sacred for us was where we were, because that is where the sacred things had happened and where the spirits talked to us.

      “Your people did not know about the land being sacred. We did not know about the land being property. We could not talk to each other because we did not understand each other. But pretty soon your people were not like a stream or even a great river any more. They were like a great ocean. This ocean washed us back upon each other. It washed us off our land.

      “Some of us wanted to fight. Some of us wanted to run away. There were old chiefs who said we should make the best deals we could so we could keep our most sacred lands for ourselves. There were even Indians who saw all the things white people had and thought we should give up our way because the Creator wanted us to try this new way.

      “We did not know what to do. You were everywhere. You were killing all the animals. The buffalo were gone. The birds were gone. You put two rails across the country that the buffalo would not cross. Then you rode by on your trains and shot the buffalo as you passed. You left them to rot in the sun. You would not let us hunt. You gave us blankets and whiskey that made our people crazy. We were put in little pens of land that were like tiny islands in your sea.

      “The worst thing is that you never even listened to us. You came into our land and took it away and didn’t even listen to us when we tried to explain. You made promises and you broke every one.

      “First you said we could have our sacred lands, but then when you wanted them you took them. That is what happened with the Black Hills.

      “Then you said we could have enough land to hunt and fish on. But when you wanted it you made it smaller or took it away and sent us somewhere else.

      “Then you said we could always hunt and fish on the lands you took for your people, but then these new people said we couldn’t.

      “You did something we did not think was possible. You killed us without even taking our lives. You killed us by turning our land into pieces of paper and bags of flour and blankets and telling us that was enough. You took the places where the spirits talked to us and you gave us bags of flour.

      “This is what you have to understand. To us the land was alive. It talked to us. We called her our mother. If she was angry with us, she would give us no food. If we didn’t share with others, she might send harsh winters or plagues of insects. We had to do good things for her and live the way she thought was right. She was the mother to everything that lived upon her, so everything was our brother and sister. The bears, the trees, the plants, the buffalo. They were all our brothers and sisters. If we didn’t treat them right, our mother would be angry. If we treated them with respect and honor, she would be proud.

      “For your people, the land was not alive. It was something that was like a stage, where you could build things and make things happen. You understood the dirt and the trees and the water as important things, but not as brothers and sisters. They existed to help you humans live. You were supposed to make the land bear fruit. That is what your God told you.

      “How could we people ever talk together when we each believed our God had told us something different about the land? We couldn’t and we never did.

      “But you were stronger. There were more of you, so your way won out. You took the land and you turned it into property. Now our mother is silent. But we still listen for her voice.

      “And here is what I wonder. If she sent diseases and harsh winters when she was angry with us, and we were good to her, what will she send when she speaks back to you?

      “You had better hope your God is right. That is all I have to say.”

      I sat, stunned. The eloquence and the heartbreak had caught me unawares. I felt tears in my eyes. This was the man I had met in the notebooks.

      Dan said nothing. In all the time he had spoken he had never once looked over at me. Now