I haven't received any more rose petals from my mother since that day in the cemetery. Perhaps, she doesn't need to leave them anymore since I get the message. Her spirit is alive and well. And as for that last rose petal, it remains in an airtight bag…a very special reminder that we do receive “visits from heaven.”
Carolyn B. Coleridge, LCSW
California
When my maternal grandmother Frances LaMaizon Jervis passed on, she promised me she would come back to visit. Frances lived with my family and me in New England and was a second mother to me.
Grandma was a very spiritual woman with a pure devotion to God and a determined will. She had many spiritual experiences and even with limited education could memorize Bible verses. We shared a lot of similarities, especially our love for angels and cats. She was an amazing healer in her own right.
I grew up listening to many accounts of her incredible life experiences. She once told me that she was a fast runner in her homeland of South America. One day she fell while running in a race, hitting the back of another athlete's shoe. As a result, her eyes were spiked by the shoe, and she was blinded. Determined not to be blind for the rest of her life, she prayed to God to help heal her eyes when she felt a presence and miraculously regained partial sight. She believed, and it happened. Obviously, she was a spiritual inspiration to me and was one of my earliest teachers.
At the age of eighty-seven my grandmother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Because this is the most aggressive and deadliest form of cancer, my family knew that it wouldn't be long before she passed. Through it all, Grandma always promised me one thing—she would come back to visit me after she died.
When I saw my grandmother in the hospital during her final days, she didn't look like herself. She was very frail and thin. The smell of the cancer eating away at her had enveloped the room. It was painful for me to see, and I am sure even more painful for her. Eventually, she was unable to speak as she lay there nearly unconscious. I told her that I loved her and that I would miss her. Suddenly, all I could hear was her struggling with her breath. My intuitive voice told me to tell her what she had meant to me. I knew her spirit would hear me. This was one of my last chances to express myself to her. I told her, “Grandma, you taught me about unconditional love.” That was something I was not aware of until that moment.
Even though she was semicomatose, my grandmother coughed coarsely and tried to speak. I interpreted this as her acknowledging what I had said. I knew she had heard me. Two days later I had a dream about her dancing with me. She was at some kind of outdoor gathering with many elderly and some younger people I didn't know. She was dancing barefoot in the center of this grassy clearing. (The grassy earth and everyone being barefoot represented to me that these souls were close to returning to the earth.) She saw me on the sidelines and ran up to me, grabbing both of my hands while pulling me onto the grassy dance floor with her.
Grandma couldn't walk in her last days so I knew the dream was a premonition of her imminent passing and the ability she would have to dance again when she crossed over. The next morning I got a call from my mother telling me that she had transitioned. Her passing left a big void in my life. She was the first close family member to die. My mother was always the disciplinarian, but my grandmother was always the playful “ma” with never-ending unconditional love. I wondered what she was doing and how she was transitioning.
Although I was saddened because she was gone, it was bittersweet. My grandmother had always wanted to return “home” as soon as she could. She had had two near-death experiences prior to her passing. One night, when she was in the hospital, her symptoms grew worse, and the staff called a Code Blue. The hospital staff was able to revive her. When she came to, she said that she went to the Other Side and that there were tons of angels around her. She stated that they showed her a scroll with her name at the top.
She had three more things to do before the golden seal was put on the end of the scroll, indicating that she had graduated and passed onto the Other Side. The nurses thought she was hallucinating and imagining the white uniforms of nurses as angels. Funny, I don't remember nurses wearing white anymore! Mostly scrubs. My family and I knew that she had truly seen her angels.
The funeral was, of course, painful. It was the most difficult when I saw her hardened body lying in the casket. I held onto her hands as a reminder of our dance together and wished her love on her journey. I admittedly felt distraught with the stone-cold feeling of her hands and the lack of warmth. I wondered about her promise to me before she died. Would she find a way to contact me?
My grandmother died on November 16, and my co-worker told me that she had a black kitten that needed a home. My grandmother loved cats, often feeding them outside our kitchen door so I immediately believed that this as a sign and agreed to take the cat. My co-worker said in another couple of weeks the kitten would be ready to leave her litter. When I asked what day the kitten was born, I was shocked to find out it was November 16, the same day my grandmother passed. Surely, this was a sign. She was sending me a black kitten born on the day that she passed. This must be her message that “life does continue after death.” I didn't realize it then, but this was only the beginning. I named my cat Lavender because this particular flower is known as being an emotional healer.
A month later I returned to my parents' home in Connecticut for Christmas. I was saddened that my grandmother wasn't there and thought about her often. One night I went to sleep; the room seemed to be filled with unusually cold air. My bedroom was always cold so I always slept in layers and frequently used an electric blanket. On this night I experienced an unbelievable dream and visitation. In the dream my grandmother walked out of the closet and came up to my bed. She was heavyset and looked healthy as she gave me a warm hug that I could literally feel.
I could feel the strength of her arms and the intense sensation you get when you are truly missed by someone. She told me she had come through dimensions and was very happy where she was. She spoke telepathically and told me things about heaven, which I barely remember but was impressed at the time. I sensed she wasn't alone when she stated she had to go because she was still being “adjusted.”
She then hugged me again and grabbed my hands, and I immediately felt this warmth of energy penetrate into them. It felt so warm, healing, and heavenly. When she left, I woke up, but it took me a long time to open my eyes. When I finally did open them, I was surprised to find the covers had fallen off of me. My body was fairly cold, but my hands were astonishingly hot! I held onto them and realized they were the only warm part of my body
I ran out to my mother and told her to feel my hands because grandmother had come to visit. My mother who had numerous mediumship experiences didn't even blink and replied, “What did you expect? She said she would!”
Grandma's healing hands from heaven helped me believe in the afterlife. She kept her promise and came back to visit me. Today, I continue on my own spiritual journey helping others believe in the continuity of life. As a medical social worker, I relay this story to other grieving families as it helps to soothe their soul. Hopefully it will do the same for you.
About Carolyn Coleridge
Carolyn Coleridge, LCSW is a psychotherapist, intuitive, and healer. A former voluntary faculty member at the UCLA Pediatric Pain Program, she performed hands on healing for children in chronic pain. She currently has a private practice and works at various hospitals as a medical social worker.
Appearing