One day I wandered off by myself to a place where I used to go with Sŏnhi to play. It was where the look-out shelter was in the middle of melon plantation. A four-feet-square platform with straw roof was propped up on four wooden stilts. You climbed on it by a ladder left there slanting against the side of the platform. As I climbed the steps of the ladder, I longed for Sŏnhi so much that I thought my heart would break. Even now I vividly recall the sensation – a first taste of sorrow in my life. The next thing I knew was that I was lying in bed back at home, conscious of the presence of some women around me.
‘If it wasn’t for the thought of Sŏnhi how could she dare to go off that far on her own?’
‘They really are a peculiar pair, aren’t they? I’ve never known any girls quite like these two.’
‘Since Sŏnhi went away, I just can’t relax for a minute for the worry of this child...’ It was mother’s voice. I opened my eyes and saw her two large sad eyes looking down into mine.
I must have had slipped off the ladder. Apparently a village woman found me lying on the ground unconscious and brought me home, carrying me on her back.
Chapter 4
A Chronicle of April
1 April. When I met Mr Kwŏn at the tea-room ‘Rose’ we felt quite natural as if we had known each other for a long time. He made me sit beside him and ordered the coffee without asking me whether I wanted it or not. He had by him a red-covered book which turned out to be Grace Metalious’ Peyton Place. When he saw me eying it he said, ‘It was sent to me by a close friend from the time I was in America. Would you like to borrow it?’ I was delighted. Besides, I now knew that he had been to America. I was dying to ask him which state, and for how long, but I refrained. I might have appeared vulgar to show too much curiosity in someone else’s private life. But I am sure his experience will be helpful when my time comes. Probably his polished manners and the refinement in his clothing are thanks to his American experience. He praised me twice today. I know it is a weakness but when he praises me I get excited and silly.
‘You look very nice in that dress. It reminds me of a fashion model I knew once in the States.’
‘Goodness!’ I thought as I blushed. I was wearing my marine blue dress with a black satin belt tied in a bow at the back. I had a matching pair of high heeled shoes. As we came down the stairs I caught my reflection in the long mirror on the landing. With a black handbag slung over my shoulder and red-covered book tucked under my arm, I did look nice. From a few steps behind, he said again, ‘You do look smart, Sukey.’
I turned to face him, and looking up said with mock severity, ‘You shouldn’t make complimentary remarks to a lady’s face.’
‘Oh, I am sorry. I do apologize.’ He bowed from the waist. His quick and witty reaction made me laugh and he delightedly chuckled in his turn. We went to a Western restaurant. He asked me whether I liked dancing.
‘Like it?’ I said, ‘I can’t take the first step,’ as if I was proud of myself.
I thought he might say ‘That is not like you, Sukey, modern woman as you are.’ In which case I would have said, ‘It is not as if I object to dancing itself. I would love it. It’s just that I am waiting until I have a boyfriend with whom I can learn it properly.’ But there was no need. He rather praised me as he nodded his head and said, ‘I am pleased to hear that. It is just like you, Sukey.’
‘I expect you are good at it?’
‘No, no. I am like you. I have had many chances to learn but somehow missed them all. I was thinking you might be able to teach me.’
Is this not evidence of his innocence and shy personality? I felt as if I could relax my guard a bit. After dinner we went to a cinema to see a Korean film entitled ‘Money’. It was ten past eleven when we came out. He called a taxi, put me in the back seat, sat himself beside the driver and told him to go to Tonamdong, and then turning to me he said, ‘That’s where you live, isn’t it?’
I closed my eyes as I leaned my head back on the seat. The love scenes from the film came floating back. I wondered why he did not sit in the back next to me. Some men would have done. In a way I was glad it turned out that way. Only by keeping a respectable distance until the right time comes can we have the right kind of relationship. I would hate myself if I were to fall into a blind passion. When the taxi had passed the Samsŏn Bridge, I had to rouse myself from my reverie, to give the driver directions to our house. Kwŏn said that the new term starts in the middle of April, and he ought to be at his new post in Pusan by the tenth, at the latest. The thought of seeing him off at the railway station for it is a certainty now that I shall be there, made me emotional. I want to make the most of the remaining days and enjoy his company.
‘You must be tired,’ he said as he helped me out of the car and lightly patted my cheeks with his fingers.
‘Good night and thank you for a lovely evening.’
‘It’s my pleasure. Good night,’ he said and waved as he got into the car.
2 April. The first thing I meant to do when I got to work was to ring him. But when I entered the office the telephone was already ringing. It was him. I could not hide the delight from my voice.
‘Oh, is that you? Did you sleep well? How is it that you always answer the phone? Is it near you?’
‘Yes, it’s just on my desk.’
‘So I can ring you often, can I?’
‘Even if it wasn’t, you can ring me as often as you like.’
‘Didn’t you get a scolding from your sister for being late last night?’
‘Scolding? Why, I’m not a child, am I?’
He chuckled. I could see his face. I love him when he does that.
‘I’ve only just woken up. I am ringing from my bed. I have the phone just above my pillow. Are you busy?’
‘No, I am not. ‘I wanted to hold onto the phone. ‘What are you going to do today?’
‘I have to go into college, of course.’
‘Even on holidays?’
‘Yes. I’ve got a lot to tidy up in my office.’ Then he said, ‘It’s my mother just peeping round the door to see why I am lying in. I will ring you later. Bye for now.’
Before my eyes floated his room; a large ondol floored room, maybe a combined bedroom and study. Apart from the sliding doors that face the inner quarters across the wooden floored hall, the three walls will be lined with books from floor to ceiling. A desk with an adjustable lamp stand and a small bed-side table with a telephone and a night light on it. A loving mother frequently popping in and out to make sure he’s all right...
After work I met him again at the tea-room ‘Rose’. I’ve learned some more about him and his family. There has been a shortage of sons in his family and the family line had been maintained by only sons for the past six generations, and now he’s the heir of the seventh. He has both parents and a younger sister doing English literature at Ewha Women’s University. He told me about her at length. Apparently she’s a tomboy and spoilt rotten.
‘She tells me, ‘he said, ‘she and her friends have started some kind of a club and appointed me as their adviser, can you believe it? It’s their monthly meeting tonight, and I am expected to be there at seven-thirty. She kept popping in and out of my room even before I was fully awake to make me promise to be there.’ He went on with a smack of his tongue. ‘I shouted back and told her I didn’t want to have anything to do with such a cheeky bunch of girls. Why they didn’t even ask my