There is a Sanskrit word, guru, which means “teacher,” or, in a more specific sense, someone who takes you from dark to light. There have been many people in my life who have taken me from dark to light personally, in one facet of my life or in many. There are people, too, who have taken this project from dark to light, and I would like to thank them here.
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My recovery meetings provide me with the quiet voices of struggle and success, and I love my home group, the “In the Solution Group,” here in San Jose, California. I am grateful to my sponsors, Mary H. (deceased) for having helped me bring my family back into my life, and Bonnie R. for her support and teaching me about compassion. My adjunct guide, Susan Montana, has been with me the whole time, giving me encouragement and challenging my assumptions about life. Thank you. My sponsees teach me more about myself and the pain of becoming real than any other source. Thank you.
I have a group of yoga teachers who have contributed to both the questions and the answers in my yoga practice and to the information contained in this book. Some laid the groundwork, some enhanced the quest, and others provided resources and structure for this material. Sarla Walter and Kate Walsh gave me my foundation in the yoga practice and principles. Annalisa Cunningham started me on my journey in putting the road of recovery and the path of yoga together. Durga Leela, a teacher and true guru, gave me so much information about taking the tools of ayurveda in concert with yoga and recovery to create a self-soothing plan of personal care and enlightenment. Nikki Myer is amazing and generous. She has never held back in offering her help, her wisdom, and the tools she has developed for reaching those who suffer from addiction. Kent Bond has enhanced my physical practice immeasurably, and the quiet weekly talks have helped me discover how the principles of yoga and my recovery program can really be applied to all facets of life. Bonnie Maeda has been my guru and my friend for many decades. She has walked down a complicated and challenging road in life and has shared the process with an open heart. She was the first to expose me to lessons from the mat including the importance of a private practice and the benefits of meditation. She did this all by example. I love you and thank you all.
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To my students, from those whom I have met only once to those who have met with me for the last several years, I have learned so much from you. Together we have explored the physical, emotional, and spiritual quest of total recovery one day at a time, on one mat at a time. In the cafeterias, meeting halls, basements, and studios you have taught me with your enthusiasm that the benefits of a yoga and breath practice are real, that each step lives in each pose, and that all the principles of yoga do live in a recovery program. Thank you for showing up and showing me the way.
Kids, Bill, Mike and Meridith, and all my cousins—I have a family now. Thanks to my Aunt Audie, who gave me unconditional love and support. She also gave me a wonderful sign I keep on my bookcase: “Thank You for Being.” What more could one ask? Over the past years I have been able to mend my relationships and develop healthy interactions with you all. You have given me support in practicing self-forgiveness, self-love, and self-care in my road to recovery. This support then extended through the last several years as I paced around, studied, wrote, took classes and workshops, wrote again, doubted, and finally committed to this book. Life is an amazing journey and you have been my travel mates. Thank you.
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Finally, thanks to the “midwives” who have taken this from dog-eared notes and typed ramblings to a real book: John Nelson, my first advocate and editor out there in Hawaii. We worked via this wonderful tool—the Internet—to help my book grow up. It worked!!! Thank you. Devra Jacobs, my energetic agent, who was able to match me and my work with a great publishing house in double-quick time. How is that even possible? Thank you. Della Calfee, who was creative and patient in taking all the photos found in the pose guide. She made that task both possible and fun. Susan Stojanovich got me to sit still long enough to have some head shots taken. What a fun time that turned out to be. Thank you. Helen O’Reilly and the folks at Central Recovery Press who have been supportive and kind to this new author who did not know the ropes. What gentle guides. Thank you.
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I am more grateful than I can express for the journey of getting to this moment. The rest, as they say, is gravy.
Twelve-step programs offer addicts an effective and supportive road map to recovery from addiction in any of its manifestations. The twelve-step process of recovery addresses spiritual and emotional healing, and, as outlined in recovery literature, is used in rehabilitation facilities, between counselors/sponsors and clients/sponsees, and in recovery meetings worldwide. However, aside from acknowledging that medical help should be sought for physical problems, and the recognition that abstinence usually leads to improved health, there is not much in the way of guidance for specific physical rehabilitation in the recovery literature.
Outside of sustained abstinence or mindfulness modification, none of the Twelve Steps is presented to address the physical impact and need for physical healing from the disease of addiction. Yoga is far more than a physical activity; it moves one mindfully into the body, breath, and consciousness of movement. This physical awareness can lead to greater understanding of the emotions and the mind. In my experience, the self-awareness that is needed for full recovery starts with physical attunement; what we find out about ourselves “on the mat” can lead to self-discovery off the mat. I wrote this book to help address the lack of specific direction for physical well-being that I perceived in the program of twelve-step recovery.
Experts agree that abstinence alone is not sufficient to result in long-term recovery. Mental, spiritual, and physical healing have to take place as well. Ceasing the activities of smoking, drinking, and legal or illegal drug use, as well as such behaviors as gambling, abusive Internet gaming, watching online porn, or other manifestations of addiction, is but one step to recovery and health. While the Twelve Steps lead through emotional healing and into the spiritual realm, yoga starts with the physical and takes you through the mental and emotional to the spiritual, and together they unify you—body, mind, and spirit.
I am aware that neither yoga nor the rooms of recovery can address the extremes of physical recovery. The health condition (both mental and physical) of the individual when he or she enters recovery will determine if traditional medical and/or psychological interventions are required. Some people suffering from addiction may have other co-occurring disorders or psychological problems. If extreme, these need to be addressed by medical professionals. These people may enter the rooms of recovery through the advice of their doctors. Other people have walked into a recovery meeting from off the street, where no official intervention—legal, medical, or other encouragement—was needed, outside of a life going to hell fast.
The program of recovery upon which all “anonymous” twelve-step groups are based brings together a community of people who have decided to join one another on the path of wellness. They follow the philosophy of the Twelve Steps and have incorporated most, if not all, of the program suggestions from the recovery literature on a consistent basis. The program guidelines suggest maintaining involvement in the recovery group, as well as working on an individual basis with a more seasoned person, a sponsor. The Twelve Steps help one to become more self-aware and to refresh or acquire and incorporate certain ethics of behavior. There is an invitation to connect or reconnect with a Higher Power, to develop or rekindle a spiritual life. The development of a relationship with a Higher Power may result in closer ties with an organized religion, or in developing a richer intimate relationship, or it may lead to a private connection with a deeper, more abiding spiritual life. The actions and feelings of a person in recovery become more thoughtful and mature, less provocative and fault-finding. The mental capacities expand and improve while the emotional responses and reactions become more measured, restrained, and moral. These are some of the results of working with the Twelve Steps, and they are the underpinnings of health and wellness in a recovering addict.
While one’s spiritual and emotional life is improving, the feeling of having reached a “recovery