“Is some kind of intentional outward service the answer to avoiding the introspection trap?” Paul sensed that something was really happening here.
“Well, I think that’s an important part. And some sort of corporate service project would be a great unifying thing for our church. But I think that a renewed look at spiritual formation can help everyone learn to see themselves as part of a larger community that is truly for the sake of the world—or, to use the nasty word: Evangelistic.”
Gracie looked skeptical. “Are you saying, Dean, that everyone has the potential to be evangelistic? Doesn’t that fly in the face of the idea that only a small percentage of any congregation is actually spiritually gifted that way?”
“What if that research is grounded in a wrong assumption?” Dean had that I’m-coming-up-with-something-nobody-has-ever-thought-of-before look on his face. “What if it defines evangelism in such a way that only the extroverts or fearless people qualify? What if that assumption—probably coming from all those spiritual gifts inventories that are floating around—is based on defining evangelism as making a presentation, getting agreement, and bringing everything to closure through a prayer of faith all in one encounter? If all that is off base, then there is the possibility that a much broader spectrum of people can be involved in leading others to faith in Jesus.”
Paul fumbled for his PDA and started making some notes. “So how would you redefine evangelism?”
Dean looked down. “I don’t have a strong handle on that yet. But I think it has to be a much more natural thing than we’ve made it to be. I think it has to pour out of our lives as we are being formed in the character of Jesus. Since we’re all wired a little differently from one another, I guess that means evangelism will look different person to person. I really believe we’ve got to help people learn how to live in such a way that their entire lives are evangelistic. I know that concepts like ‘lifestyle evangelism’ and ‘servant evangelism’ have helped along this path, but sometimes I think they still risk allowing people to remain unconnected to other people while trying to let their lifestyles and service speak for themselves.”
Paul looked up. “So evangelism, based on what you’re suggesting, is potentially the natural outflow of a life of spiritual formation?”
“I think so. I hope so. And isn’t that the kind of spiritual journey we want to invite people on?”
“I think we need to start writing this down,” said Gracie. “It’s probably going to take awhile. Can we order lunch?”
Paul waved to the waitress, signaling that they were ready to order. She was young, in her early twenties, and usually took care of the section where Paul liked to sit.
“Hi, Angie. I think we’re finally ready to earn our keep here.”
Angie smiled, and rolled her eyes in mock-exasperation. “Well, it’s about time! At this rate you may as well stay for dinner.”
“Sorry. It’s just that we’re racking our brains to solve cosmic issues. We’re on a mission from God.”
Angie put on a look of feigned interest. “So you guys are the Blues Brothers. Er, and Sister.” They all laughed.
Gracie looked up over her menu. “So, Angie—got any solutions for us?”
Angie looked down at her order pad. “Nope. No views on the God thing. So what are you going to have today?”
Suspecting they had just moved into sensitive territory, they ordered their lunches. As Angie finished up and left to place the order, another figure moved to the table.
“Hey, everybody. What’s going on today?”
“Hi, Emil. Good to see you.” Paul brightened up at Emil’s arrival.
Emil was the pub’s main bartender. He and Paul had gotten acquainted over the years and even ran into each other on occasion at a local coffee shop. Paul really liked Emil and had even invited him to church. Emil always politely declined.
“You guys look like you’re in an intense conversation today. Lighten up—this is supposed to be a fun place!”
Dean laughed and said, “Yeah. We’re here talking about church stuff. No fun allowed!”
“Ah, yes. Church stuff. Now I know why you’re intense. It does always seem like a lot of work to me.” Emil looked sympathetic.
Paul suddenly had a revelation. “Hey, Emil. You might be able to help us with something. You just might have a point of view that would give us a way to get out of a box we think we’re in. Would you be willing to get together to talk with me?”
Emil replied, “Sure. Just don’t expect anything really deep from me! How about tomorrow morning at The Grinder?” Since that was both Emil’s and Paul’s favorite coffee shop, it was a natural meeting place. It was also close to the pub and made it easy for Emil to head to work afterward. They agreed to meet at 9:00, giving Emil two hours before he had to be at work.
“I’ll be there. Thanks, Emil.”
As Emil went back to his post, Gracie looked over at Paul. “Doing a little market research, Paul?” Gracie had obviously put on her consulting hat.
“I just have a feeling that someone like Emil could offer a perspective that we don’t have. And there’s just something about that guy. He seems to see the world in a different way.” Paul looked over to the bar, watching Emil serve his customers another round of beers. He was somewhat surprised that Emil had agreed to meet him so quickly.
5
“‘Look, a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ Yet wisdom is vindicated by her deeds.”
Matthew 11:19
As Emil poured the drinks he wondered once again about his place in the work of tending bar. No longer desiring the alcohol himself, he found it easy to distance himself from the effects it was having on the people he served. He always looked into their eyes as they sat at the bar. The people often acted happy and even relieved to be there, but Emil sensed things behind their eyes that belied their apparent contentment. There was even something in him that suffered in the pain that he knew dominated many of the lives that came to sit before him. Yet he continued to give them what they asked, knowing that a kind of leanness was being poured into their souls.
Angie brushed by Emil as she began getting drinks for a table of four. “Hey, Angie. You were sure in a hurry to get away from Paul’s table. Everything OK?”
Angie kept pouring and spoke so softly that Emil had to strain to hear her. “Yeah. They’re nice people but the God questions they always slip to me sort of bug me. It just hit me wrong today.”
“Sounds like something is eating at you.”
“No, I’m OK.” She arranged the drinks so they would balance on the tray. “I don’t know. I’ve just got some stuff going on. It’ll all work out.”
“You mean, it will all work out all by itself?”
“Yeah, all by itself. That’s the way my life works most of the time.” Angie picked up the tray and hurried off. It was evident that, at least for now, the conversation was over.
It had been twelve years since Emil got sober. Before that he had been medicating the pain in his own life so regularly that clarity of thought and vision was a rarity. After a two-day, alcohol-poisoned blackout he got scared. When his sister convinced him to attend his first AA meeting, he had little hope for any change in his life. But change did come, and the Anglican priest that led the group had helped