Well, here’s how life laughed at my plans. I got my first freelance article assignment a week after I completed the first draft of my first screenplay. Not long after, I was writing columns and doing feature articles for a hip magazine aimed for college-aged through twenty-something readers. Over time, my desire to write a novel became less important than writing a non-fiction book. I self-published two of those, before getting the opportunity to go the traditional route with this one.
My point is this: Your dreams may pivot. They may even change. But there must be a kernel of something you’ve always wanted to do that makes it into your adult mind, if not your adult life.
What Do You Want?
Go back in time. Think about those things that have stuck with you—the activities you did as a kid and thought about pursuing—the ideas that roll around in your head and show themselves every now and again. Now’s the time to take them out to play.
Were you the entrepreneur who sold not just lemonade, but snacks, door-to-door? Do you get annoyed every time you see someone else introduce an invention or service you thought up years ago? Do you dream about running your own business?
Were you a member of the art clubs in high school, but detoured to a more stable career? Have you always wondered what would happen if you had pursued creative arts? Is what stopped you then still stopping you now?
Did you volunteer, lead a book club, or bake lemon meringue pies for friends and family? Are you still doing some version of that? Would you like to?
Maybe the life you want has nothing to do with the life you have. And that’s okay, too. This chapter is all about one question: What do you want? And only you can answer it.
Road Trip Exercise 1A: GoalTopia
Take out your notebook or open a dedicated computer document. At the top of the page, write “GoalTopia.” Underneath, write “GoalTopia 1.” You can also use the worksheet at the back of this book.
What’s Your Ultimate Dream, Goal, or Desired Accomplishment?
•Are you a bestselling author, flourishing creative, or sought-out expert?
•Do you own a successful business?
•Are you excelling in your current role at work? Getting promoted?
•Are you pursuing a different career?
•Do you have a happy relationship, lots of money, and a well-balanced life? What does that look like?
Write down the first thing that comes to mind.
Done? Great.
Now, give it some thought. Meditate. Set a timer for fifteen minutes. Close your eyes, clear your mind, and let your thoughts wander. Try not to fall asleep. But if you do, no worries. The timer should wake you.
Visualization Hack: Meditation
Meditation itself has many versions. If you live in a big city like I do, you may find a studio that offers a variety of meditation practices like guided meditation, crystal and aroma therapy, or sound healing. You can also find a variety of guided meditations to listen to online or through an app. I like the Insight Timer app; it has more than 25,000 free guided meditations.
The simplest way to meditate is to sit comfortably, close your eyes, breathe naturally, and focus on your breath. This enables you to clear your mind, leaving room for contemplation and reflection. Meditation reduces stress, increases clarity, and re-energizes you. These are all valuable attributes as you figure out your GoalTopia.
However, many people have their own version of meditation that is way more active and effective. If sitting still as you ponder doesn’t suit you, there are alternatives.
Divert your concentration: Take a walk, play video games, do a puzzle.
Take part in an activity: Exercise, do the dishes, fold laundry.
Sleep: Put the question “What do I want?” in your head before you go to sleep, and see what comes to mind in the morning.
Meditation, like many actions, is about trial and error. Explore different forms to discover what works best for you.
Time’s up.
Write your next header: “GoalTopia: Take 2.”
Answer the question again: What’s your ultimate dream, goal, or accomplishment?
Write it down.
If necessary, repeat this process a few more times. You picked up this book for a reason. I’m guessing it’s because you know you need a life-change. You also probably know what you want to do, but it may take a little time to bring it to the forefront of your mind. If need be, give yourself an extra day, or two, tops. You don’t want to go into overthinking mode.
Review Your List
Once you are happy with your potential GoalTopias, read through the list.
Do you see similarities? Is everything the same? What keeps popping up? This could have to do with your job or career, company, industry, family, health, wealth, lifestyle. It may be a combination of all of the above.
After some consideration, from your list, identify the GoalTopia—or combination of GoalTopias—you want to focus on and write it down under the header: “Ultimate GoalTopia.”
Case Studies
This first case study has a few different versions of GoalTopias, but her ideas share a common element.
Career Change
Cynthia likes, but doesn’t love, her job. Her biggest frustration is that due to budgetary constraints, her salary level is not commensurate with her knowledge and experience. She knows she needs to start her own business or, preferably, get a new job at another company.
GoalTopia 1: Quit my job and work for people who appreciate me and compensate accordingly
GoalTopia 2: Become CEO of a Fortune 500 Company
GoalTopia 3: Have enough money to not worry about bills
GoalTopia 4: Be happy and healthy doing what I love and enjoy quality time with my family
GoalTopia 5: Start my own successful business
These ideals are interrelated, so they can be easily combined.
Ultimate GoalTopia: Find a position with a growing company—or create one—where I can share my knowledge and be a productive, well-compensated member and eventual leader of the team; be happy, healthy, and wealthy; and have nice work-life balance.
In this next one, these GoalTopias are all over the place:
Reboot
Travis left his job in the entertainment business last year due to health issues. He worked his way up from being a production assistant and knows practically everything about being behind-the-scenes in the film and TV industry. He has been doing some contract work, but really wants to develop his side projects that teach up-and-comers what they need to know to survive in Hollywood.
GoalTopia 1: Find a new industry niche, so I can continue to work/earn
GoalTopia 2: Write my memoir to share my stories, while teaching wannabes and entertaining fans of the shows I worked on
GoalTopia 3: Relaunch my podcast
GoalTopia 4: Launch my series of workshops/retreats
GoalTopia 5: Be healthy
Travis wants to find a new specialty, while sharing stories from his old one.
Ultimate GoalTopia: Get the education and training I need