my ideas were stupid
even though I had taught this subject for five years at a college level, that I wasn’t enough of an expert on it
my web designs were amateur and simplistic
people would judge me negatively and criticize my book for not being in-depth, complete, or advanced enough
That’s right: every day.
The way I often describe the experience is that instead of exercising creativity, I practiced its evil twin: destructivity. With every fearful thought of not being expert enough, not knowing enough, wondering if my writing was any good, and doubting my ability to design websites, I tore myself down. To try to build myself up, each day I had to focus on what was directly in front of me and do my best to ignore my anxieties about my perceived deficiencies. But they were still there.
Sometime in the fourth month of writing, I’d had enough. I needed
to figure out how to turn off (or at least manage) this unending parade of self-critical thoughts. I did a little bit of research on self-criticism and found out about this thing called the Inner Critic. Although I didn’t know it, something clicked inside of me, because a few days later, an idea for a presentation came to me in the shower. Still dripping wet and wrapped in a towel, I grabbed pencil and paper to jot down four pages of notes. A few weeks later, I was awakened at 5 a.m. by an idea for a creativity-busting workshop. Something big was brewing in my subconscious.
However, while I was designing the website for The CSS Detective Guide, I had a truly magical experience that changed everything.
To have my book’s website up before I spoke on a panel at the major tech conference South By Southwest (SXSW) Interactive at the end of the week, I sat down to create my website mockup in Photoshop from a sketch so I could code it more easily. Much to my surprise, my quick sit-down consumed me, so much so that I was an hour and a half late going to a friend’s house for dinner. Through the whole evening, I longed to return to my designing, so when I got home at 12:30 a.m., I thought “I’ll just do a little bit and then go to bed.” 1 a.m., then 2 a.m., and then 3 a.m. rolled by, and I just couldn’t stop. With my favorite jazz playing in the background, I was in the high of creative flow as I experimented with color, typography, and layout. It was sheer bliss.
Finally, at 5:30 a.m., still fired up about designing, I stopped because I knew that if I didn’t, I would surely get a migraine the next day. Buzzing from the creative juices coursing through me, I did my best to go to sleep.
Waking up again a mere two hours later, I was eager to get back to my creation. My whole body effervesced with energy. In fact, I was beyond blissful: I was euphoric. I felt a continuous rush of excitement and power similar to that of being in love. I felt like I could do anything I put my mind to. I felt like the ultimate version of myself: I felt the full power of my creative potential.
Only in retrospect did I understand why this was such an incredibly powerful peak experience: it was the first time in so long (maybe ever?) that I had experienced creating with no internal self-critical commentary: No thoughts of, “Is this any good?” or questioning my abilities. No comparing my design to those of other people.
No worrying about what other people would think or say about it. For the first time in eight months, I experienced criticism-free creating.
That day I made two monumental realizations:
First, that the absence of my Inner Critic allowed my creativity to flow! Because it was quiet, there was space for my creativity and ideas to come out to play.
Second, that creativity is power, and it’s a source of power that each and every one of us has.
Unfortunately, most of us rarely tap into our creative power. Why? For the same reason I sat on my couch and cried for two days instead of starting to write my book. Because of the litany of self-critical thoughts and the self-doubt that they generate. Because of the Inner Critic.
Immediately following those realizations, I had an even deeper epiphany: helping other people reach the feeling of being energized and completely alive by allowing their creativity to flow was what I wanted to do with my life. Why? Because when we remove the blocks, we can access this source of personal power. And when we learn to remove the blocks to more regularly access and channel our creative power, we can transform our lives and the lives of others – and change the world for the better.
I became obsessed: I threw myself into learning about the creative process, specifically how to remove creative blocks. No matter which approach I studied, whether it was based on psychology, neuroscience, productivity, or practicality, they all led back to the same place: the Inner Critic.
Completing my first book did indeed become the springboard for becoming a speaker in the tech industry. Once I had established a good reputation for myself, I shifted to speaking about the creative process, removing creative blocks, and silencing the Inner Critic. As I suspected, the content resonated deeply with audiences. When I took my presentation content a step further by writing an article called “Banishing Your Inner Critic,” the response was phenomenal. Hundreds of people posted and shared the article on social media for several days. It even got celebrity attention: on Google+, actress Felicia Day shared the article and vouched for the techniques that I shared. All of the responses validated what I had suspected when the idea for the creativity talk first came to me the shower: the Inner Critic is a problem that everyone has and that everyone needs help with.
During the next few years, through the feedback from more talks, keynotes, workshops, several more articles, coaching clients, and heartfelt emails from attendees and readers describing how much the information spoke to them and altered their lives, I knew it was time for me to reach an even wider audience. I knew then that I had to take my content to the next level and make it more accessible to even more people. The indications were clear: it was time for me write a handbook on how to Banish the Inner Critic. Through this book, I could help people reclaim their creative power and start achieving more success by silencing their own voice of self-doubt.
It’s Time for You to Triumph Too
You’ve felt lost and in a stupor, wandering your own wastelands of self-criticism. Fortunately, you are about to (re)discover your Creative Self and your Creative Power, and break yourself out of your Inner Critic-induced trance.
In this book, you will
learn the origins of the Inner Critic
discover the one brain function and three skills that you already possess to vanquish your Inner Critic
learn multiple methods to deal with the fear of being negatively evaluated by others
discover how to transform highly critical self-talk into that of approval and encouragement
work on bolstering your sense of self to feel that you and your ideas are good enough
acknowledge, unblock, and enhance your creativity
channel your now flowing creativity as a force for positive change in the world
You, my friend, are a pathfinder, and this book is a manual to guide you along the path of silencing your Inner Critic. Through the pages of this book, I’ll be your mentor, providing you with necessary information to change your thinking habits, and your coach, cheering you on as you release your inner critical thoughts and replace them with thoughts that support your creativity and motivate you to do your best work. Through this process, I’ve totally got your back.
But the best part is that through using the tools contained in these chapters, instead of being your own worst creative enemy, you’ll have your own back too. By the end of this process, you’ll only value and respect your creativity more, but you’ll also end up liking and appreciating yourself more on the whole. Furthermore,