The opposite extreme is also destructive: if your self-control outweighs your motivation, you won’t act decisively. Hamlet was a classic case: His famous “To be or not to be” soliloquy summarized his entire life. He could not make up his mind about anything, not even killing himself.
Indecisive poker players haven’t got a chance, but you may know some of them, including a few who understand poker theory. They try to avoid commitments by checking when they should bet and folding or calling when they should raise.
Winners balance their intense drive to win and self-control. If the stakes are too low or they have won so much that they feel complacent or they have other things on their mind, they won’t care enough to play well. Conversely, if the stakes are too high or they are losing heavily or they are risking the rent money, they will lack the essential detachment and control. Winners constantly monitor themselves, and if they are not both motivated and controlled, they take a break or go home.
Winners’ Laws
As in the last and most future chapters, the Winners’ Laws shift from analysis to action. They tell you what you should do to apply a chapter’s principles.
1. Accept a painful reality: intense, ruthless competitors have a HUGE edge.
You may wish that normal, balanced people were not at such a disadvantage, but you must accept that reality. If you compete against people who are equally talented, but much hungrier, you will lose.
2. Accept another painful reality: you can’t make huge changes in your competitive drives and talent.
They are like your poker cards. Since you can’t change them, you must accept them and use them well. Many self-help books about other subjects exhort you to be totally committed to success, to ignore your limitations, “to reach for the stars,” “to dream the impossible dream,” and so on, but such exhortations are silly.
• You want what you want, not what other people say you should want.
• Your talent is like your height; you may want to be taller, but it won’t happen.
So accept yourself as you are, and don’t feel guilty about not being what you can never be.
3. Assess your own talent and motivation honestly.
Since you can’t change them, you must know what they are. The next chapter contains procedures for assessing your motives. Now we will focus primarily on one question: How talented are you?
Without answering that question, you can’t make intelligent plans. For example, unless you have immense talent and commitment, you have no chance to become a world-class player. That fact is obvious, yet many merely competent and a few mediocre players have told me they can become stars.
After looking at yourself, apply the same logic you use with your cards. It is not how good they are, but how they compare to those of the other players. A flush is a good hand, unless someone has a better one. You may be more talented, motivated, and controlled than most people, but your competition is not average people.
The average IQ is exactly 100, but that average includes everyone from idiots to geniuses. Retarded people rarely play poker, but many extremely intelligent people do. I’d estimate that the average cardroom player’s IQ is about 115, and the average is higher in larger games. The same pattern exists for most other qualities such as motivation, discipline, theoretical knowledge, and skills: the bigger the game, the tougher the competition. The critical question is not how intelligent, motivated, disciplined, and so on you are; it is How do you compare to the people in your game and in every game you want to play?
Motivation is essential, but it cannot overcome a huge difference in talent. If I played tennis with a top player, I would be extremely motivated, and he would be bored. But I would not have a chance. The opposite principle applies if talent is nearly equal. If two tennis pros have slightly different talents, but the less talented one is more committed, he will probably be more successful. He will practice harder, analyze his game more critically, keep in better shape, and do other things that his more talented, but less motivated competitor, may neglect.
Unfortunately, the same factors that cause losers to overestimate themselves cause them to underestimate the competition. They think that their competitors aren’t really more talented and committed. They are just lucky or whatever other excuse the losers can invent. To succeed you must objectively compare yourself to your competition.
4. Work on your self-control.
You can increase it, but it won’t be easy. Of course, no poker authority ever says that winning is easy. Understanding and accepting your limitations are critical steps toward increasing your self-control. Then you must constantly monitor your actions and motives.
When you are making important decisions, ask yourself: Why am I making this decision? If you have thoroughly analyzed the situation and sincerely believe that your decision will increase your profits, it will probably do so. If you have not thoroughly analyzed the situation or if you are driven by other motives, you will probably reduce your profits.
How Do You Rate?
Most chapters end with this question, and it may be the most important one. You may dislike self-analysis, but deliberately comparing yourself to winners will help you plan your development. You will get the most benefit if you take four steps for every rating scale:
1. Rate yourself as objectively as possible.
2. Ask one or more people who know you well to rate you.
3. Compare your ratings and discuss any differences. Why did your ratings agree or disagree?
4. Discuss the ratings’ implications. What should you do about them?
You will compare yourself to winners by indicating how much you agree or disagree with various statements. These statements often contain extreme words such as “always,” “completely,” and “never.” Of course, hardly anyone is extreme enough to be rated a 7 or a 1. In fact, if you have several extremely high or low ratings, you are probably not being objective. Rating your agreement or disagreement with extreme statements is a standard psychometric technique.
There are two rating scales, one for motivation and one for self-control.
Your Motivation
Rate only your desire to maximize your profits. You may also be extremely competitive about sports, sex, winning arguments, or being the center of attention. These drives suggest that you’re a su-percompetitor, and they are usually liabilities. They divert your attention and cause other people to react negatively to you. Winners focus their extreme competitiveness on winning the chips. If other competitive drives are so important that they cost you chips, reduce your rating.
Circle the number that best describes how much you agree with this statement: While playing poker, I am intensely competitive. I will do almost anything to maximize my profits. (7) Agree strongly, (6) Agree, (5) Agree somewhat, (4) Neutral, (3) Disagree somewhat, (2) Disagree, (1) Disagree strongly.
Circle that number in the appropriate place in “The How Do You Rate? Data” section on page 258.
Your Discipline
Circle the number that best describes your agreement with this statement: While playing poker, I am extremely disciplined. I can control myself no matter what happens. (7) Agree strongly, (6) Agree, (5) Agree somewhat, (4) Neutral, (3) Disagree somewhat, (2) Disagree, (1) Disagree strongly.
Circle that number in the appropriate place on page 259.
When you finish the book, that chapter will contain all your self-ratings to help you see the overall picture. It then recommends ways to become the winner you want to be.
The Critical Questions
Review this chapter, especially the