“Why are we going there?”
“My mum said she would come and get me from the home when she got better. Can she get me from Canada? I don’t think I want to go.”
“What if I don’t want to go either?”
“Can we come back from Canada if we don’t like it there?”
“Will I get to see my sister? I think she went to Canada.”
“Does my mum and dad know you are sending us there?”
“Is it really cold in Canada?”
“Is that why we had to wear our winter coats?”
“Who is going to look after us?”
“Do buffalo have big horns? Can they get us?”
“How are we going to get there?”
“Nobody asked me if I wanted to go. What if I want to stay in England?”
The master found it difficult to tell who was yelling out with questions coming from all directions and all at once. He raised his voice and told them to stop. “Put up your hand and ask one question at a time if you want me to answer.” He had fervently hoped that he and Nurse could keep the children occupied and their thoughts away from where they were going, then drop them off at Canada House and make their departure without this question period. He could see that he had better come up with some good answers, or they would have some very unhappy children on their hands. He surveyed the little group, assessing the impending mutiny. He asked them to be quiet and let him finish. He told them, speaking slowly, that from London they would travel to Liverpool. A lovely huge ocean liner, the Duchess of Atholl, would be waiting there to take them to Canada.
Marjorie asked if he and Nurse would be coming to Canada with them. But he shook his head, said “No,” and told her that they would take the children as far as Canada House and then go back to Birmingham. He smiled and told the children that he and Nurse were not as lucky as them, since neither of them could go to Canada. Bending towards them, and with a very serious note to his voice, he said, “Now, children, listen carefully. You are going to Canada House so that some Canadian people can meet you. Canada will not let just any children into their country, only the very good boys and girls.” He made them all promise him that they would be on their very best behaviour. “Promise me,” he urged. “It is for your King and your country.” The children had no choice but to promise. Master beamed his pride and said, “Good. Now, no more questions and finish your sandwiches.”
“But, sir, can we see Canada from Liverpool?” asked a little boy.
“Of course you cannot see Canada from Liverpool. It is too far away. Now, I said no more questions!” The master put his sandwich down and pulled out some papers from the case he was carrying and pretended to be busy with his work. He didn’t notice the look of alarm that spread over the children’s faces. They had already travelled so far from their families that most of them knew they would never be able to find their way home. Now he was telling them they were going across the great big ocean. How could any of them ever hope to make it back to their families from there? Dreaming of a visit from their mums and dads had kept many children from losing hope and now this hope was gone.
Marjorie’s appetite had vanished. She turned to Nurse and whispered. “If it is so far away, then we aren’t coming back ever, are we?” She wanted to know about her sisters Joyce and Audrey and her best friend Olive. She begged Nurse to go get them. “They should be with us. Don’t make me leave them,” Marjorie pleaded. Marjorie felt Kenny squeeze in beside her and take her hand, but she did not take her eyes off Nurse.
Nurse reminded Marjorie that Audrey was in sick bay. She told her that if she gets better, she might come out to Canada at a later date. She looked away, and said that Joyce had to stay at the home — the home needed her. Although Nurse told Marjorie and Kenny this, she knew that the Fairbridge Society had rejected their big sister Joyce because they thought she was too old for their program.
“You need her?” Marjorie’s tears flowed down her cheeks. “But I need her! She’s my big sister!”
Kenny looked at Nurse with his big brown eyes, “I need her too.”
Nurse had had enough and she told them so. “Some things are just the way they are.” She assured them that when they grew up they would understand, but for now, they just had to realize that the home knew what was best. She noticed that many of the children were watching and listening. She turned and swept her arm to include them all, as she suggested that the children would simply have to learn to accept things. They all should be thankful that they were chosen to go to Canada, “It will be a wonderful new life, so don’t be ungrateful for the chance you have been given.” Refusing to answer any more questions, she got up and sat near the master.
Marjorie sat back in her seat. “Damn it!” she said under her breath. “Goddamn and hell!” That was why they did not let her run into the kitchen this morning. Kenny was watching her. He warned her that she shouldn’t swear and that she would get into trouble. Then he asked her if he could finish her sandwich, as it didn’t look like she wanted it. As Marjorie handed it over to Kenny, she asked him why she should care if they hear her swear. Then she whispered to Kenny that she was going to jump up and swear her head off and then maybe Canada would not want her because she was too bad and then she would get to go back to the home to be with Joyce, Audrey, and Olive.
She began to get up on her seat whispering to herself the horrid things she would say, but she stopped when she looked at Kenny. His eyes were wide, staring back at her in disbelief, his mouth open. He warned her not to do it. It was then that it occurred to her that she was all her little brother had now. If they sent her back, they would not send Kenny back with her. He would be all alone. How could she leave him? Joyce told her how their mum made her promise to look after the three younger ones. She guessed now it was her job to look out for Kenny.
Marjorie sat back in her seat and let misery creep in. There was no excitement left for the day — this was not a good adventure. She wanted to go back home. If only she liked working in the kitchen more, maybe Nurse would have needed her too. But she could not leave Kenny. Marjorie fought away her tears. There was no point in crying. She was afraid, but Kenny’s worried face forced her to try to be brave for his sake.
An eerie quietness descended over the car. The children were lost in their own thoughts. Marjorie looked up as one of the girls walked up to Nurse and broke the silence. She wondered if she could ask just one more question, but carried on without waiting for a response and asked why she was told not to bring anything with her today, because if she is going to Canada, she should have brought her mother’s picture and her letters that were under her cot in her treasure box and she couldn’t get them now if she wasn’t going back to the home. “Why?” she whispered. “Will you send them to me? Do they have a post in Canada? You won’t make me just leave them will you? I have only one picture of me mum. I, I …” Her voice trailed off towards the end and tears were streaking down her face.
Nurse could see the tears spreading to the other children. Even the tougher boys were struggling. There was no sign of the morning’s jovial atmosphere. Not everyone agreed with the home’s policy of sending children off without letting them know where they were going. She hated lying to them. She had worked so hard over the past few months to build up their trust, but all seemed shattered now. She wondered what it was like for these children not to take their few precious belongings, not to say goodbye to good friends, and especially not to say goodbye to siblings. She had tried to imagine what that was like on several occasions, but it was impossible.
The home had strict guidelines in place and she had to work within them. It was believed that toughening up these little children was crucial to their survival. They could not be sent half way around the world unprepared for the rigours they would face. The home looked down on any sign of weakness, especially from the staff. They felt it harmed the children’s progress. The children needed to learn to be resilient. It would be a long, and perhaps rough, ocean passage, and then a long arduous