That their lives are not like ours
We must meet them where they are today
Find their strengths, then raise the bar
It is not up to us to “fix them”
Or correct what’s tough at home
But we can teach them to accept themselves
And help them know they’re not alone
We can love them and respect them,
Teach them to act responsibly,
We can model compassion and acceptance
And challenge them to think more critically
It’s not up to us to change them,
Rather, the environment in which they learn
Let our classrooms be their safe place,
To question, explore, discern
We can truly make a difference
Starting with the Heart, our fervent vow
And with SEL as the foundation
We can ignite HOPE in our schools now!
About the Author
Michelle L. Trujillo, MEd, is an author, inspirational speaker, and educational consultant. “Mrs. T,” as she is known to her students and reading audience, makes a tangible, sustainable, and positive difference through her books, keynotes, and training seminars. She shares enthusiasm, experience, and applicable takeaways with her audience, while she imparts a philosophy that ignites hope in schools and the workplace. Named Nevada’s 2017 Innovative Educator of the Year, Michelle has appeared on television (including Oprah) and radio across the nation as a guest expert. Her keynotes and trainings leave audiences enthused, inspired, deeply touched, and wanting more. Feel free to contact Michelle at www.ignitinghopenow.com to schedule her as a speaker or workshop leader.
Introduction Social, Emotional, and Academic Development: A Way of Being
She was obviously tired. She came to school that morning appearing dirty and disheveled. But, she came to school. Through tears of frustration, she explained she had slept on a park bench the night before. She had tried to go home, but her mom was doing a drug deal and locked her out of the house. So, she walked to the park and eventually fell asleep on a bench, alone and cold. When the sun came up, she walked to school. Her mom didn’t know where she was, and in her opinion, her mom didn’t care . . . but, she came to school. Why? Why did she choose to show up, when others might have chosen to go to a friend’s house or wander aimlessly? Because it wasn’t just about school, it was that at school, she was connected. This beautifully rebellious, wildly stubborn, and woefully broken-hearted teenager came to school because she knew that we expected her, that we wanted her, and that we cared. This connection she felt did not happen naturally. It was a connection born in intention and effort. Connection that makes a difference in the lives of human beings must be conscientious. To be conscientious is to be mindful, intentional, or attentive. To truly be connected, we need to start with the heart in a true effort to see others for who they are on the inside, and appreciate and value them as such. This is imperative in the school setting, because when we as educators sincerely connect with each other and with our students, we set a tone for belonging, living, and learning that is impactful and potentially life-changing.
As I look back on my career as a teacher and an administrator, I realize I was blessed to live and love my vocation. To me, it was never a job, or work I dreaded. Instead, it inspired me, filled me with joy. I believe there was a reason for this. The students at the alternative education high school where I served as a principal said it best. When asked why they were able to find success at our school when most had not achieved academically nor personally prior to enrolling with us, one word resounded again and again: family! They said that when they became students at our school, they felt accepted into a family that would love them, hold them to high expectations, and provide them with a second chance. That doesn’t mean it was easy or that immediate positive change occurred. Yet, our school family provided the students, and staff for that matter, with a connection to something greater than themselves. We were connected by a common purpose as we aspired to pursue integrity, responsibility, and education. I use the word we purposely. The administration, counselors, teachers, paraprofessionals, custodians, support staff, students, parents, the school board, and community members all knew that we were stronger together than any of us were individually. We had more talents, expertise, and gifts when combined. We knew our chance for success increased exponentially when we chose to encourage, support, and challenge one another. We knew the road ahead would be rugged at times, and steep, because most of our students came to us from a place of adversity or trauma, yet we were steadfastly aware we would be okay, because we would travel the road together, sharing the challenges and the joy, the trials and the triumphs.
As you read this, you may be thinking, “What kind of school is this?” I can tell you . . . it is any school in which, regardless of its size, the human beings who inhabit it choose to make a conscientious connection by starting with the heart. It is any school in which the human beings who are the adults in the school environment choose to see the stories behind the human beings who are the students. In fact, it is any school in which the human beings who are the adults choose to see the story behind one another, and model for their students to do the same, so that people are met where they are, with every person seeking to understand before jumping to judgment. It is a school in which social and emotional learning is a philosophy in which all are invested, so that academic achievement has an opportunity to occur because the all-encompassing we are engaged and empowered to trust, to grow, and to learn.
If you are interested in this kind of school, please join me on a journey to explore the power of connection and the fundamentals of social and emotional learning and its impact on academic development. I have an idea of what you may be thinking. In fact, I’d guess that it sounds something like this: “I appreciate your invitation, but as much as I would like to go on this journey with you, I just have too much on my plate. I cannot add one more thing!” I’ve been there. I know the feeling. The expectations for educators and the pressures they face, regardless of their role, seem to get more demanding each day. New state and federal mandates, protocols for measurable outcomes for students and educators alike, and requirements for state assessments that correlate results with teacher or school performance create a sense of anxiety and heaviness that can permeate our halls, our classrooms, and our hearts. In addition, we are seeing more and more children with mental health issues, as well as those (children and adults) who are living with past or present trauma, and these things, too, fill our plate with the need for an emotional energy that can be beyond our capacity. But this is the very reason that you cannot afford to neglect this journey. In fact, the reminders, reflections, and discoveries that you will find within these pages will give you back time, and help you to be more effective and productive.
In Chapters 1 and 2, we will explore how the power of love and connection can impact an education system in a life-changing way. According to the Aspen Institute (2018),
Schools must be safe, welcoming, and supportive spaces for student to learn and for them to feel a sense of belonging and the freedom to develop their own identity and sense of self. . . . Indeed, the greatness of public education lies in its promise to take all individuals and provide them with the opportunity to build the life they want. (pp. 1, 3)
As educators, we have the responsibility for creating an environment that will lead to a fulfilment of this promise for our students. I hope that these chapters will encourage you