The Day the Ear Fell Off. T.M. Alexander

doesn’t head for the staff room. I can cover both.’

      ‘Excellent,’ said Jonno. ‘Best to be prepared.’

      ‘Looks like I’m water monitor then,’ said Fifty.

      ‘So we’re on ear duty,’ said Jonno, looking at me.

      ‘Right. Off we go then.’

      Copper Pie grabbed Bee’s arm but before they could skedaddle Jonno said, ‘Hey! Put it there,’ and held his hand out. Copper Pie slapped his hand down on top – it made a thwack. Bee did the same.

      ‘Come on, guys,’ said Jonno.

      My hand joined the tower, then Fifty’s. Jonno moved his hand up and down and counted, ‘One, two, three’, and then pushed all our hands up really hard so they flew high in the air.

      ‘See you tomorrow,’ we all said.

      Tea was ready.

      ‘Have you got a best friend?’ asked Flo.

      ‘Yes, but he lives miles away in Scotland,’ said Jonno.

      ‘What’s his name?’

      ‘He’s called Ravi.’

      ‘That’s the name for pasta,’ she said.

      ‘That’s rude, Flo,’ I said.

      She ignored me.

      ‘Have you got a sister? asked Flo.

      ‘No. There’s only me,’ Jonno answered. ‘I’d like one though.’

      ‘Trust me, you wouldn’t,’ I said.

      ‘Don’t be mean, Keener,’ said Fifty. ‘Flo’s an excellent sister. Look, she can make Play-Doh pigs.’ He pointed at the little models she’d arranged round her plate.

      ‘They’re not pigs, they’re babies,’ she said. ‘Muuuum! Fifty said my babies are . . .’

      We bolted our food and escaped to get on with ear creation in my room.

      I put away all my special models whenever someone comes round because I’d rather no one touched them, but because I hadn’t had any advance warning, they were all laid out on the floor in their special positions. I’ve got a whole army of vehicles with different weapons. We had to tiptoe carefully between them. Jonno was really interested. They’re all either Lego or made from junk. I showed him where the Spitfire is going to sit when it’s ready. He picked up my Deathmobile. I didn’t want him to but he was really careful so I forgot to be bothered and explained how the missiles fly out from underneath instead. He had a go at shooting Fifty, who was swinging in my hammock, but he hit my skimboard by mistake.

      ‘Cool board,’ Jonno said. ‘Can you surf?’

      ‘I can, but I like skimming better.’

      He’d never heard of it, so I said we’d take him with us next time my dad and I had a boy’s trip to Devon.

      Eventually Fifty reminded us we were meant to be ear making.

      ‘Right. What shall we use?’ I said.

      We started another long list of rubbish suggestions: cotton wool, tofu, mushrooms, buy a joke ear . . .

      ‘STOP!’ shouted Fifty. ‘We’re getting nowhere. How about we each have a go on our own and see which one’s best?’

      ‘Fine by me,’ I said.

      ‘OK,’ said Jonno.

      We decided to bring our three ears into school and let the group pick the winner. I was quite looking forward to a bit of sculpture.

      The doorbell rang. Mum shouted up to us, Jonno ran down, shouted ‘Bye’ and was gone.

      ‘I’m glad he went first,’ I said.

      ‘Why? He’s OK I think,’ said Fifty.

      ‘It’s not him. I just don’t know how I’m going to get to school by quarter past eight. Mum always drops me off.’

      ‘We could walk together.’

      ‘Will your mum let you?’

      He chewed his lip. ‘Well . . . she will if our class are having a walk-to-school day.’

      ‘But we’re not.’

      ‘Looks like we are now,’ he said.