“Hi, Andrea. Say, those look like my towels.”
“Oh, these? Yes, well, we’ve redecorated and these don’t fit in with the new colour scheme.” Andrea started to put them on the counter. Then she stopped and looked at me. “Would you like them back? They’re a little thin now, but you could still get some use out of them.”
The bitch had balls.
“Sure, thanks.” I took the pile of pale blue towels from her. “I can always use some extra towels around the old trailer.”
She shifted and placed the clothing on the counter. “Well, nice to see you again, Bliss.”
“What have you got there?” I asked her. “Can I see them? Maybe there’s something I could use.” I sorted through the pile of neutral outfits. “Oh, this is nice.” I held up a pale pink pullover with beige trim. I held the matching pants up to my waist and let them pool onto the floor. “Darn, way too big.” I pawed through the pile, saying, “too big” or “too long” at each item. “It’s a shame we aren’t the same size; I could use some new outfits and your clothes are really good quality.”
By now you could hear a hair fall to the bare wood floor in that place.
“What are you doing, Bliss?” Andrea whispered.
“What do you mean?” I asked, not lowering my voice. “I just thought that, since you were my lawyer when Mike and I divorced, you might still be interested in my welfare. For instance, if you need to buy a new tea kettle, I wouldn’t mind having the old one. Or an iron. Actually, the ones you’re using now probably used to be mine so, I’m just saying, if you get new ones, I’d be happy to drop by and pick up the discards. It would save you bringing them here. I can’t carry anything too big on my motorcycle, but small appliances and blankets would be great. You wouldn’t believe how cold that trailer gets in the winter.” I smiled bravely up at her.
She was too smart to take the bait. She was thinking fast, but before she could move or speak, I upped the ante.
“Listen, Andrea. When you were my legal aid lawyer, I thought we were becoming friends. Sure, I was a little surprised when I found out later you and Mike were, well, better friends — even before he told me he wanted a divorce — but I know you gave me the best legal counsel possible. I don’t believe for a minute there was any conflict of interest on your part.” I let my voice break a little. “It wasn’t your fault I wound up with nothing but fifty acres of swamp south of town. And, I’m serious, if you have anything you don’t need any more, give me a call and I might be able to take if off your hands. Here, I’ll give you my cell number.”
Andrea turned and walked out the door, her head held high.
I gazed after her, forlornly waving a piece of paper in the air, the receipt Holly had just given me. When the door closed, I pulled some change out of my purse and handed two loonies to Holly. “Here, this is for the towels. Is it enough?”
Holly pushed my hand away. She said, “Are you kidding, Bliss? I should give you your twenty dollars back, just for the entertainment.”
“Thanks, Holly. I hope, if anybody asks, you can truthfully say I never made any threats or accused Andrea of being unprofessional.”
“I remember every word, Bliss, and you have nothing to worry about. Have you heard that Mike is going to run in the next election? He’s really reaching for the stars, isn’t he? If he wins, he’ll be one of the youngest Members of Parliament in history.”
“Oh, he’ll win.” I rammed the towels into the bag on top of the canned goods. “With Andrea’s father grooming him, he’s a shoo-in. Next stop, 24 Sussex Drive.”
“He’d sell our oil rights to the States … or our water. I hope somebody stops him.”
“Maybe somebody will.” I wrestled the bags toward the door and waved at Holly with one free finger.
As I reached the alley between the library and the video store next door, Andrea stepped out of the shadows and blocked my way.
Surprised, I let go of the bags and they slipped to the ground. Darn, I hated dented cans, but perhaps it was just as well my hands were free. Andrea had six inches and at least fifty pounds on me, and by the flush high up on her cheeks, she was pissed. I looked around. No witnesses.
Arms crossed over her chest, Andrea leaned toward me. “Mike told me how you threatened him, trying to extort money. That could be construed as blackmail, and you could wind up with legal problems. Take my advice, as your former lawyer. Stay out of our way, or you’ll think a juggernaut ran over you.”
Adrenaline flowed, making my heart race and my body ready to do battle. I tried to damp it down to keep the oxygen in my brain. This fight required wits, not muscle.
“I don’t know what you mean, Andrea. As Mike probably told you, I gave him a figure I thought was a fair share of the estate we accumulated during our marriage. I’d be more than happy to give back the fifty acres in exchange.”
“You signed off all rights to any other properties at the time of the divorce. We owe you nothing.”
“Well, at the time I thought my lawyer was looking after my interests. I didn’t realize she was sleeping with my husband. Did you know I registered a complaint with the Law Society of Upper Canada?”
Andrea snorted. “Of course I know. They contacted me. How did that go for you?”
“Not so well. They sent me a nice letter saying they would look into the matter, then a couple of months later another letter arrived dismissing the complaint, but telling me I had the option of suing you. Anyhow, there will always be a record of the complaint, with your name on it. It would be such a shame if that came out during Mike’s campaign.”
“Do you really think we’d let that happen? We could make you look like a total nutcase.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Andrea. The ex-wife of the Liberal candidate is living in a trailer, working several minimum-wage jobs, buying food and clothes from the second-hand store.” I nudged the bags with my toe. “Why, I could supply pictures of me in my overalls, raking up the cemetery, or cleaning houses. Goodness me, whatever would the voters think? Let alone the party officials. They might consider Mike a risk they don’t want to take. I told Mike all this, but he’s a stubborn guy.”
“Mike offered you money, but you refused to take it. How does that look?”
“You mean yesterday’s offer at Tim Hortons? I don’t believe there were any witnesses to that offer. The amount on the cheque was an insult, and expecting me to sign a waiver means you underestimate me. You can tell Mike to shove both the cheque and the waiver so far up his ass he’ll need surgery to retrieve them. I believe I forgot to suggest that to him.”
“Mike and I are deeply committed to one another. We have a brilliant future, and we won’t let you spoil things for us. This is your last warning.”
I held up my hands. “Hey, I’m not planning to interfere with your future. I just want what’s fair, and you know what that is. Think about it, and I’m sure you and your true love will do the right thing.”
I bent down and picked up my shopping, relieved when Andrea didn’t swing her brown Louis Vuitton bag down on my head.
“Andrea, don’t get your hopes up about becoming the wife of the prime minister of this nation. Once Mike gets to the first rung and feels he can do without your father’s connections, he’ll dump you without a backward glance. He’ll marry some pretty little blonde who will give him a couple of cute little blond children to grace his Christmas card photo. Don’t kid yourself; Mike is only thirty-two and you’re, what, forty? You may be in love, but to him you’re only a means to an end.”
I took five minutes to unpack the bags and resettle the items in the saddlebags of the Savage after watching Andrea march away. After that, I felt calm enough