CAPT. (trying to repress his anger).
In uttering a reprobation
To any British tar,
I try to speak with moderation,
But you have gone too far.
I'm very sorry to disparage
A humble foremast lad,
But to seek your captain's child in marriage,
Why damme, it's too bad
[During this, COUSIN HEBE and FEMALE RELATIVES have entered.
ALL (shocked). Oh!
CAPT. Yes, damme, it's too bad!
ALL. Oh!
CAPT. and DICK DEADEYE. Yes, damme, it s too bad.
[During this, SIR JOSEPH has appeared on poop-deck. He is
horrified
at the bad language.
HEBE. Did you hear him? Did you hear him?
Oh, the monster overbearing!
Don't go near him—don't go near him—
He is swearing—he is swearing!
SIR JOSEPH. My pain and my distress,
I find it is not easy to express;
My amazement—my surprise—
You may learn from the expression of my eyes!
CAPT. My lord—one word—the facts are not before
you
The word was injudicious, I allow—
But hear my explanation, I implore you,
And you will be indignant too, I vow!
SIR JOSEPH. I will hear of no defence,
Attempt none if you're sensible.
That word of evil sense
Is wholly indefensible.
Go, ribald, get you hence
To your cabin with celerity.
This is the consequence
Of ill-advised asperity
[Exit CAPTAIN, disgraced, followed by
JOSEPHINE
ALL. This is the consequence,
Of ill-advised asperity!
SIR JOSEPH. For I'll teach you all, ere long,
To refrain from language strong
For I haven't any sympathy for ill-bred
taunts!
HEBE. No more have his sisters, nor his cousins,
nor his
aunts.
ALL. For he is an Englishman, etc.
SIR JOSEPH. Now, tell me, my fine fellow—for you are a fine
fellow—
RALPH. Yes, your honour.
SIR JOSEPH. How came your captain so far to forget himself? I
am quite
sure you had given him no cause for annoyance.
RALPH, Please your honour, it was thus-wise. You see I'm only a
topman-
-a mere foremast hand—
SIR JOSEPH. Don't be ashamed of that. Your position as a topman
is a
very exalted one.
RALPH. Well, your honour, love burns as brightly in the
fo'c'sle as it
does on the quarter-deck, and Josephine is the fairest bud that
ever
blossomed upon the tree of a poor fellow's wildest hopes.
Enter JOSEPHINE; she rushes to RALPH'S arms
JOS. Darling! (SIR JOSEPH horrified.)
RALPH. She is the figurehead of my ship of life—the bright
beacon that
guides me into my port of happiness—that the rarest, the purest
gem that
ever sparkled on a poor but worthy fellow's trusting brow!
ALL. Very pretty, very pretty!
SIR JOSEPH. Insolent sailor, you shall repent this outrage.
Seize him!
(Two Marines seize him and handcuff him.)
JOS. Oh, Sir Joseph, spare him, for I love him tenderly.
SIR JOSEPH. Pray, don't. I will teach this presumptuous mariner
to
discipline his affections. Have you such a thing as a dungeon on
board?
ALL. We have!
DICK. They have!
SIR JOSEPH. Then load him with chains and take him there at
once!
OCTETTE
RALPH. Farewell, my own,
Light of my life, farewell!
For crime unknown
I go to a dungeon cell.
JOS. I will atone.
In the meantime farewell!
And all alone
Rejoice in your dungeon cell!
SIR JOSEPH. A bone, a bone
I'll pick with this sailor fell;
Let him be shown at once
At once to his dungeon cell.
BOATSWAIN, DICK DEADEYE, and COUSIN HEBE
He'll hear no tone
Of the maiden he loves so well!
No telephone
Communicates with his cell!
BUT. (mysteriously). But when is known
The secret I have to tell,
Wide will be thrown
The door of his dungeon cell.
ALL. For crime unknown
He goes to a dungeon cell!
[RALPH is led off in
custody.
SIR JOSEPH. My pain and my distress
Again it is not easy to express.
My amazement, my surprise,
Again you may discover from my eyes.
ALL. How terrible the aspect of his eyes!
BUT. Hold! Ere upon your loss
You lay much stress,
A long-concealed crime
I would confess.
SONG—BUTTERCUP
A many years ago,
When I was young and charming,
As some of you may know,
I practised baby-farming.
ALL. Now this is most alarming!
When she was young and charming,
She practised baby-farming,
A many years ago.
BUT. Two tender babes I nursed:
One was of low condition,
The other, upper crust,