‘It’s odd that we’re the only ones here,’ whispered Stella, leaning forward.
Nick nodded solemnly but there was a flicker of amusement in his eyes.
‘What?’ Stella asked.
A smile twitched at the corners of his mouth.
‘Tell me,’ she demanded.
‘If you need any help with the menus, please ask,’ said the waitress, appearing beside them. She flitted off again.
‘Do you come here often?’ Nick asked blandly.
‘Never been here before in my life,’ Stella said. ‘What is it?’
‘I wanted to know if this was your favourite restaurant, that’s all.’
She was puzzled. ‘What’s that got to do with the lack of customers?’
A party of six people arrived and the waitress flew to the front desk to usher them in. Despite the increased noise from the new arrivals, Nick still whispered.
‘I mentioned to a friend that we were coming here and he told me they’d had a write-up in one of the papers recently.’
She nodded. ‘I knew I’d read about it somewhere. Mussels to die for…Ah.’ She got it. ‘It wasn’t a good review, was it? In fact,’ she looked for confirmation in his face, ‘it was a Very. Bad. Review, wasn’t it?’
‘Bad is not the word,’ Nick said. ‘Horrendous fits the bill more successfully. Apparently, the reviewer had mussels and ended up cancelling his holiday because he was so sick. Mussels you’d die from was the tone of the review, I’m afraid.’
The whole situation suddenly struck Stella as hilariously funny. Trying to prove that she was a coolly independent modern woman, she’d inadvertently recommended a restaurant rocked by a food poisoning scandal.
Laughter bubbled up inside her and she bit her lip to stop it erupting. It was no good. She burst into laughter at exactly the same time as Nick. They both roared so loudly that the newly-arrived customers stared at them curiously, interested to see what was so amusing.
‘It’s not funny for them, but it’s hilarious really,’ she howled, leaning over the table and clutching her stomach with the intensity of her outburst. ‘I knew I’d heard something about this place but I couldn’t remember what and I didn’t want to say yes to Figaro’s instantly because I didn’t want you to think…’
Their waitress appeared, looking anxious. ‘Is…is everything all right?’ she asked.
‘Wonderful,’ squawked Stella. ‘Joke, that’s all.’
Nick composed himself.
‘Just another minute, please.’
The waitress drifted off.
‘You didn’t want me to think you were a pushover,’ finished Nick.
Stella grinned. ‘Got it in one.’
‘We can leave if you want to,’ Nick added, ‘although I’d prefer to stay now that we’re here. It might be hard to get a table anywhere else at such short notice, and our waitress would be so upset if we did leave.’
That did it. Stella smiled at him in admiration. Any man who was so kind would be worth a proper date. She could always say she couldn’t see him again at the end.
‘I don’t think I’d have liked you if you’d wanted to leave,’ she admitted. ‘The mussels could have been a once off and it would see so mean to leave now, when the dear waitress was so thrilled to see us.’
‘I agree. And there’s pasta on the menu, anyway, so less chance of fatal illness there.’
Stella erupted again.
‘Are you ready to order?’ inquired the waitress, once again materialising out of nowhere. Was she on roller skates? Stella wondered.
‘Yes,’ smiled Nick.
They ordered quickly – no fish – and agreed on a bottle of claret.
‘I am very out of practice at this date thing,’ Stella confessed when they were alone after the waitress had served the wine. ‘I’m sure that even saying that contravenes modern dating standards, but I can’t help it. I did all my dating when flares were in, the first time. I’ve forgotten the rules.’
‘I didn’t know there were rules,’ Nick replied. ‘See what I know about women. I thought I had to fill in your dance card, and after fifty dates, we were allowed out without chaperonage as long as I kept one foot on the floor at all times.’
Stella giggled. ‘Let’s skip a bit. I left my dance card at home, anyway. I think we have to tell each other our histories. That’s what they do in those articles in the paper when they set people up on blind dates.’
‘I’m afraid I never read that stuff,’ Nick said apologetically.
‘Men never do. But the theory is simple: we each get five minutes to tell our life stories.’
‘Five minutes,’ he said. ‘I don’t know if mine will last that long.’
‘I bet,’ said Stella in mock cynicism. ‘OK then, make it shorter, say…twenty words or less. Let’s keep it short.’
‘Twenty words,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘OK. You first or me?’
‘You,’ she said quickly.
‘Right. You keep count of the number of words and when I’ve done twenty, stop me.’
‘More than twenty, and I’ll leave,’ Stella replied solemnly.
‘Forty-four, Irish, two daughters, fourteen and nineteen, married for twenty years, worked abroad, ran engineering company, divorced a year ago, head-hunted home. That’s more than twenty words, isn’t it?’ He stopped and his face had a faint weariness about it.
A hard divorce? wondered Stella with intuition. Or something else?
‘Sorry,’ she apologised. ‘That seemed tough for you, I didn’t mean it to be.’
‘No, you’ve a right to know who you’re having dinner with. Laying your life down in a mere twenty words makes it sound pretty hopeless.’
Stella fiddled with the stem of her wine glass. She wanted to ask why the marriage had broken up but was unsure of venturing into such personal territory. She decided to tell him her story. ‘Age: undisclosed.’
He laughed.
‘A woman’s age, like her weight and dress size, is highly classified information,’ Stella said gravely. ‘If I tell you any of them, I have to kill you. One daughter, wonderful Amelia, who’s seven and absolutely adorable.’
‘You’re using too many words,’ Nick put in.
‘Nick.’ She fixed him with a stern glance. ‘I’m a lawyer.’
He laughed again.
‘One daughter, Amelia, seven. Lawyer, specialising in property, divorced, erm…two fantastic younger sisters, great parents, yoga, perfume bottles, bad at picking restaurants…’ She broke off.
‘That’s good.’ ‘Tell me more about the perfume bottles bit.’
‘I love those little crystal perfume bottles, the ones with silver tops from ladies’ dressing tables a hundred years ago. I have magpie tendencies when it comes to junk like that. And costume jewellery, forties and fifties stuff.’
‘What about the fantastic sisters?’
Stella’s face always softened when she thought of Holly and Tara. ‘Holly’s the youngest and she works in the children’s