I smiled, hugely flattered, although that wasn’t going to go down well with Sexy Samantha.
‘Look, just make yourself comfortable and I’ll be back real soon.’
I heard him give her a quick kiss, then another muffled noise as he no doubt picked up his phone.
I heard his footsteps run down the stairs and his front door slam and the phone went dead.
Crap. The last thing I wanted was to come between him and his girlfriends. He would be pissed off when he got over here to find the only thing that he had left his hot girlfriend for was a stupid little letter.
I heard the key in the lock and then his footsteps as he ran up the stairs towards me. Crap, crap, crap.
He appeared in the lounge, took in my worried face and in a second was across the room and holding me in his arms.
‘Oh Harry, I’m really sorry, I shouldn’t have called,’ my voice was muffled as my face was pressed into his wonderful hard chest.
‘Yes you should. You always should.’
‘I didn’t realise I was interrupting a night of passion.’
He pulled back a bit to look at me in confusion.
‘I heard you on the phone, talking to Samantha.’
He laughed. ‘I was talking to Jemima.’
For a second I wondered if he had moved on already from Samantha to a new woman – it wouldn’t be the first time – then I remembered his beloved cat.
‘I was asleep, she was lying on my chest. She wasn’t impressed about being moved.’
I laughed. ‘Well, please send her my sincerest apologies. And I’m sorry to you too, I didn’t mean to wake you.’
‘Oh, don’t worry about it.’ He shrugged.
‘It’s nothing though, nothing serious.’
He was going to hate me.
‘It’s obviously something or you wouldn’t be calling me.’
I sighed and pulled away completely. I picked up the letter and showed it to him. ‘It’s from Jack.’
Harry’s eyes widened. ‘Now that does sound like something serious.’
Oh God, I loved this man.
‘Have you read it?’
‘No, I wanted you to be with me when I did.’
He smiled. ‘I’m honoured you would think of me. Where did you get it?’
‘I had dinner with Jules tonight, she found it amongst his things.’
He pulled me down next to him on the sofa.
‘How’s your gorgeous niece?’
He was delaying, trying to distract me, and I let him as I curled up at his side, the letter in my hand.
‘Beautiful, getting more beautiful each day. God she looks like Jack. The same dark hair, the same eyes. Even the same feet. It breaks my heart that she’ll never know him. He would have made a wonderful father.’
‘He met her though. Got to hold her. And when’s she old enough you can tell her all about him. Play all the practical jokes on her that he played on you.’
‘I’d like that.’
He looked at the letter. ‘Do you want me to read it to you?’
‘No, I want to read it.’
I stared at it. He stared at it. It would have been so much easier if the letters were like the Howlers in Harry Potter, where the envelope would simply shout the contents at you, whether you wanted to open it or not.
‘Come on love.’ Harry put his arm round me. ‘It’s a big deal, I get that. But are you not dying to see what he says. I know I am.’
I quickly slid my thumb under the flap and ripped open the envelope. The letter inside was small, so no huge reams of big brotherly advice then.
I pulled it out and opened it. Harry respectfully waited for his turn to read it. As I started to read, Harry’s fingers stroked the back of my neck.
Dear Stinky,
Stinky Sue, his childhood name for me that had stuck and was subsequently shortened to Stinky, or rather childishly Stinky Poo, or even just Poo. I smiled. I loved my brother so much.
So I’m dead, that kind of sucks. And I had the best practical joke to play on you too. Took months of planning and I was just about to spring it on you when the whole leukaemia thing took over. I’ve asked Jules to finish it for me, so I’d watch your back if I were you.
My biggest regret about dying is not being able to whip your arse on Mario Kart again. You know that I was the better driver and that last time we played you won purely because I was tired from the chemotherapy. But if I thought you were going to go easy on me because of my condition, I was sadly mistaken. I don’t know how you can live with yourself, beating a dying man at a video game. You could have let me win.
I laughed at this.
Know this, as revenge, I put my toe nails in your bed and hid several more around your flat. I know toe nails freak you out. Every time you find one, think of me, and know that I’m watching you. And not in a big brotherly protective way, but in an evil, stalky kind of way. If I can, I’ll rattle my chains and moan a lot now and again just to scare you. I swear, if I can come back and haunt you I will.
Ok now for the serious bit. I talked about this with Jules but with everything else that happened in the last few weeks we just never got round to talking about it with you. I want you to be Bella’s godmother. She needs a wonderful aunt and I know that you will always be there for her, with trips to the zoo and sleepovers and I know you will spoil her rotten. But also I know that if anything were to happen to Jules there is no one else in the world but you that I would want to raise my daughter.
I swallowed a lump in my throat.
I love you and I’m so very proud of you. I want you to be happy. I know you so well and I bet any money that Harry is sitting next to you whilst you read this, probably holding your hand. Tell him I said hi, and that Chelsea sucks, that will piss him off.
‘He says to say hi to you,’ I said.
‘He mentions me?’ Harry smiled proudly.
‘Yeah he says Chelsea sucks.’
The smile fell from his face at the slur on his beloved football team. ‘I’ll give him Chelsea sucks. He’s only saying that because he’s dead and he knows I can’t argue back.’
‘He loved to wind you up.’
Harry smiled, fondly. ‘What else does he say?’
‘Here.’ I leaned into him so he could read the letter too.
And one more thing I want you to do for me, my dying wish – and you can’t refuse a man his dying wish. Tell Harry you love him, that you’ve always loved him and always will be in love with him.
I gasped with horror and snatched the letter back from Harry.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘How far did you get?’
‘The bit about the