‘Ah, but not as beautiful as you.’
His words make me blush. I’m still not accustomed to his compliments and I don’t know what to say. I scuff the ground with my boot, mimicking Sapphire’s coy gesture and he laughs.
We’d met in the museum of all places. It was my first time there and he saw me gazing wistfully at a landscape of rolling green fields, punctuated by galloping horses. I must have looked as frazzled as I felt because he asked if I were trying to escape into the painting.
‘Is it that obvious?’ I asked with a rueful laugh.
Like a true gentleman he didn’t answer that. He just gave me the smile I would come to know so well and cherish as he took me by the arm and led me to the café for a cup of tea. He encouraged me with friendly small talk and it wasn’t long before I was unburdening myself to him as though I were in therapy.
Mine was the usual ‘boss from hell’ story. My shrill and ineffectual supervisor was the queen of mixed signals. She didn’t know what she wanted or how to express it; all she knew how to express was rage and derision when I couldn’t read her mind. Nothing was ever good enough for her and after months of frustration and sleepless nights I was really starting to lose it.
My companion listened attentively and nodded with sympathetic understanding. ‘People are like horses,’ he said, surprising me with his analogy. ‘They need clear directions from a confident authority figure and they’re happiest when they know exactly what’s expected of them. And they should never be shouted at.’
I had never thought of it that way before but his words certainly struck a chord.
‘That’s how my horses are happiest anyway,’ he added and my eyes widened.
‘You have horses?’ I exclaimed.
He’d probably seen the same girlish reaction before, but he still seemed charmed.
‘Would you like to see them?’ he asked. ‘You do seem like you could do with a weekend in the country.’
I surprised myself by jumping at the offer. He’d picked up on more than just my need for a holiday. I had been on my own for far too long and I was in need of male attention as much as a break from the city. Vaguely I recalled a scene from a film where a lonely woman flirted with a stranger in a museum before going back to his place for an afternoon of sex. The affair ended badly and bloodily for her in the hotel lift. But I heard no warning bells in my mind at the thought of following this man home. My hesitation lasted only a moment. John had already earned my trust and I imagined that any man who kept horses must have a kind and gentle nature.
The house he took me to was an hour’s drive from the city, set back from the main road and surrounded by trees and fields. Elegant without being ostentatious, it looked like the sort of place you’d find on picture postcards advertising the tranquil English countryside. It was just what I needed. He was just what I needed.
‘I think they like you,’ he says, startling me from my reverie. ‘They never show off like that just for me.’
Sapphire and Cheyenne are chasing each other like kids, stopping at intervals to rear up and wave their long legs in the air, whinnying softly.
I smile, thinking of them as new friends rather than as someone’s pets. Their breath steams in the crisp autumn air and I pull my coat tighter, suddenly feeling the cold. They had even made me forget the awful weather.
‘Come on,’ John says, ‘let’s go inside by the fire where you can warm up.’ He doesn’t miss a thing.
I follow him gratefully into the house and just as gratefully accept a glass of red wine. A fire crackles in the hearth and as my bones begin to thaw I think of the horses.
‘Do they have somewhere warm to go?’ I ask.
He sits beside me, smiling indulgently at what I’m sure is a stupid question. ‘I’ll show you the stable if you like. I keep it nice and toasty for them but they like to run free in the paddock until dinnertime. The cold weather makes them frisky.’
Frisky. A feeling I had imagined was long gone from my repertoire. But as I look into his soft grey eyes I find my energy returning. I sigh with contentment, imagining how it must be to live like that, safe and sheltered, fed and cared for, free to run and prance outside and nibble treats from a beloved hand. A life of no confusion, no responsibility other than to be just what you are. It sounds like heaven.
Before I know it I am in his arms, my lips pressed to his, my entire being throbbing with need. His arms encircle me and hold me tightly and I melt into his embrace. He lifts me easily and carries me from the room. I give up all control and close my eyes as he takes me up a flight of stairs and down a corridor into his bedroom. When he lays me down on the bed I open my eyes. Unusually for me, I don’t feel a trace of insecurity or self-consciousness. I know without asking that he is in charge, just as he was with the horses.
He undresses me slowly and I let him, enjoying my self-imposed helplessness. It calms and reassures me in a way I never would have thought possible.
When I am quite naked he surprises me by making no move to remove his own clothes. He simply stands at the foot of the bed, his eyes roaming over every inch of my bare flesh as though assessing me. I feel his gaze as I would his touch and my body responds accordingly. My heart begins to beat a little faster, my skin burns with need and I feel myself growing wet as I anticipate surrendering completely to him. He approaches me and I start to sit up, reaching for him.
‘No, no,’ he says, pushing me back down. ‘Just lie perfectly still. I want to look at you.’
One at a time he takes my arms and stretches them above my head. A wave of desire washes over me and for a moment I feel dizzy. Then he steps back again and the deep concentration in his face makes me feel even more naked and exposed. The position forces my back to arch, thrusts my breasts up invitingly.
At last he touches me, drawing a single finger down the length of my right arm to my throat. He pauses there and I gaze at him imploringly. My sex is pulsing hungrily. But he merely smiles as the finger continues tracing its way down between my breasts. I whimper as he neglects them completely, veering around my navel to stop at the soft mound of my sex. The finger rests there and I close my eyes, my breath hitching. All my senses are wildly stimulated. I feel the cool, polished wood of the headboard against my knuckles, the silky softness of the bedclothes beneath my legs. I smell the piney aroma of the trees outside. It’s as though he’s gradually awakening my body, heightening my arousal and teasing every inch of me into a state of excitement bordering on madness.
When at last I feel his hands on my thighs I gasp. It’s all I can do to keep from begging him to fuck me. He gently eases my legs apart, exposing the damp cleft that aches with a need so intense it hurts. He slips one hand down my inner thigh and gives a little squeeze. The nearness of his hand is almost enough. Almost. All it would take is one touch. One swift little stroke across the pearl of my clit. But when I open my eyes I see he has no intention of ending the torment.
He is still merely studying me and I wonder just what exactly he’s seeing. Or looking for.
‘Aren’t you –’ I start to ask.
He shushes me, placing a finger softly against my lips. His only answer is another enigmatic smile as he takes my hands and pulls me up into a sitting position. Then he goes to the wardrobe and opens a drawer. I hear the jingle of a tiny chain as he takes something out and returns to the bed with it.
When he holds it up I blink in confusion. I can’t be sure but it looks a little like a bridle. One made to fit a person. Things have suddenly taken an unexpectedly kinky turn. But while I’m excited by the possibility of a new and strange experience, such games are completely unknown to me. I’m way out of my depth and suddenly my lust spirals away into a vortex of anxiety. Not knowing what to say or how to respond, for fear of being wrong or making a fool of myself, I simply stare at the device in silence. Seconds pass with painful awkwardness while I try to think of something to say. Anything.