Kate glanced across at Paul, wincing. ‘Sorry. It’s weird. I’ve got a vague memory of some of the things I said, in a sketchy sort of dreamlike way – but I don’t remember saying that.’
Paul made a dismissive gesture. ‘It’s fine,’ he said tersely. Then, less tersely, he said, ‘No, it’s really fine. Just feels a bit weird to be jealous of my dead twin, that’s all . . . Anyway, shhh, it gets way more interesting in a minute.’
‘But you’re feeling ill?’
‘Yes. I feel terrible. My head’s throbbing. I shouldn’t be surprised that I’m getting a cold, but I’m still pissed off about it. I was lucky last time I was here, because I didn’t get one then. It’s totally unreasonable but I feel like you do when you get ill on holiday, sort of outraged. If I’m ill I won’t be able to enjoy seeing Stephen so much. I decide to go for a little walk, to try and clear my head. If I’m about to be ill it might be my last chance for some fresh air for a few days.’
‘Where are you now?’
‘I’m still looking through the lab window but without Stephen noticing . . . I didn’t want him to catch me spying on him, but then he looks up and sees me . . . I pretend I’m just passing, on my way to the woods. I wave at him, and he waves slowly back, his eyes all wide as he gets distracted from his task. He smiles at me, but suddenly the smile goes, and he snaps his attention away from me and on to the man who’s just walked into the lab.’
‘Who is this man?’
‘I don’t know. He’s in a lab coat too. He’s thin and bony and bald and it’s silly but he’s so creepy-looking that I think, “oh look, it’s Doctor Death”. That’s what he looks like. It must be Stephen’s boss, the director of the centre. Dr Gaunt – that’s what his real name is. Stephen doesn’t like him, he said before that he thinks he’s a cold bastard. I remember he laughed at the pun: a cold bastard. Stephen turns his back on me when the man’s talking to him, so I wander off across the field. I think if I go into the woods it might be a bit cooler.’
‘Then what happens? Is there a fire yet?’
‘A fire? No. No fire. It’s just hot because it’s summer and I think I’ve got a temperature as well . . . I want to lie down.’
‘So what do you do?’
‘I walk into the woods. It isn’t so hot there. The trees are all shady and old, and it’s dark and quiet. I feel like I can breathe better in there. The ground is mossy, and I think: perfect. I decide to have a nap because I’m so tired . . . I lie down under a tree, between two big roots, and it’s lovely and soft. I’m asleep really quickly . . .’
‘Do you sleep for long?’
‘I don’t know. But I’m woken up too soon. Something wakes me up.’
‘What wakes you up, Kate?’
‘Voices. Voices wake me up; men’s voices talking.’
‘Can you see these men?’
‘No. They’re on the other side of the tree from me. I sit up and look around. They’re standing a few feet away from me with their backs to me, but it’s so quiet in there that I can hear every word they’re saying. One of them is Doctor Death, I mean, Gaunt, without his lab coat, and the other one is a fat man in a suit, with a German accent. He’s a visiting scientist.’
‘What are they saying?’
In the car, Kate and Paul were both leaning forwards in their seats, gripping hands. Paul of course had heard it before, but he was as agog as Kate, perhaps waiting for her reaction to what was coming next. Kate remembered that she had talked about falling asleep under the tree, but she genuinely had no idea what the conversation she’d overheard was about. She thought briefly of Doreen, and wondered if she was surprised at all this talk of labs and scientists – they hadn’t mentioned that the place was a research laboratory.
‘They’re laughing,’ Kate said on the disk, slowly and clearly. ‘The German one goes “We’re ahead of you on this one.” Doctor Gaunt says, “Ah, but you’ve lost five already.” I’m confused. I can’t think what they’re talking about. Maybe the football. Then the German says, “You’re being far too timid in your experimentation – you’ll never catch us up, with your insistence on these ridiculous ethics.” Now I know they aren’t talking about football . . .’
Kate squeezed Paul’s hand involuntarily, with shock. ‘Oh shit,’ she said.
‘Wait,’ Paul replied, ‘It gets worse.’
‘Do they say anything else?’ Doreen’s voice betrayed no surprise at the unexpected turn of recollection. She retained the same calm, soothing monotone.
‘Yes. Doctor Gaunt says, “If it were down to me . . . We’re completely handicapped by Bainbridge – he’s becoming a liability. He’s even got old family friends staying here now, though she won’t be here much longer. What we’ve just discovered is going to blow you out of the water, my friend . . . But it’s difficult – funds are tight, you know how it is . . . Mangold has been more than generous, but he’s starting to demand results . . . Imagine, if the press knew what was going on here, they’d close us down and we’d all be in jail. If they think what Porton Down does is controversial, God knows what they’d make of this!”’
‘What do you do next?’
‘I huddle up behind the tree with my arms wrapped around my knees. I try to make myself as small as possible because I suddenly just know that I will be in big big trouble if they see me here . . . I can’t let them see me . . . I’m really scared now, especially because they mentioned me. I keep thinking about Stephen and wondering if he knows about any of this stuff. I’m going to have to ask him – but what if he does, and he’s been hiding it from me? It sounds bad. They aren’t talking about the common cold, that’s for sure.’
‘Do you ask Stephen about it?’
On the recording, Kate had started to cry. ‘No. Because I never saw him again. He died before I could talk to him. The scientists eventually left the woods and I waited a bit longer and then went back to my room. I felt even more ill by then anyway. I went to bed. Sarah was there, but I was too sick to talk to her so I didn’t even care. I just ignored her. The next thing I remember was being woken up by someone screaming, and Sarah pulling me to get up.’
‘Tell me about the fire, Kate . . .’
‘It was like the world was on fire . . .’
Kate clicked off the car stereo, her fingers shaking so much she could barely turn the knob. ‘I can’t listen to any more, not at the moment. It’s too much.’
‘So you really don’t remember saying any of that when you were in the trance?’ Paul caressed her tense hand.
‘Well. Like I said – sort of. But not in so much detail. And not what Dr Death and his friend were talking about . . . But it makes sense, in a way. It makes sense now why Sampson’s after us. He works for Dr Death. He doesn’t know how much I know, and he’s freaking out. Oh God, Stephen, they’ll kill us both –’
Kate didn’t even notice her mistake, until Paul removed his hand from hers.
‘I’m Paul, Kate. Not Stephen.’
Kate