‘Ooh, fighting talk,’ said Lee and proceeded to hold his fists up and dance around, shadow boxing.
Neve called to Willow and hooked her onto the lead, before heading up the steps to the bridge. Lee called after her.
‘I do love you, Neve! I’m so glad we’ve found each other again!’
‘Go to hell!’ she yelled without looking back. If she looked at him now, he’d be sure to see the fear on her face.
Neve forced herself not to break into a run. She wanted to put as much distance between her and Lee as possible. It had been harder than she imagined seeing him again. And she hadn’t been prepared for the mix of emotions it had stirred up.
She could feel the tears sting her eyes as she battled with the memories of what happened that August. The festival had been a watershed moment for her and Megan, as they danced to the music, drank alcohol and took whatever substances Lee had on offer. It should have been the start of her and Megan growing up and experiencing life. They had so much they wanted to do together.
Neve headed across the meadow. She couldn’t face going home just yet. She didn’t want to bump into anyone in the village in the state she was in. She followed the path along the river bank, cutting across the top of the meadow. From here, she could take the long route around the back of the village and into Long Acre Lane.
The meadow grass tickled Neve’s ankles as she circumnavigated the field, following the curve of the boundary round towards the river. Clumps of yellow buttercups, dandelions and patches of red and white clover carpeted the ground like a patchwork quilt. As she walked along, the sun broke free from behind a cloud, making the water look like a sparkly glitter ball.
Willow mooched around, her nose close to the ground, snuffling away at the assortment of smells. Neve stopped to watch a pair of swans glide past, looking serene and elegant. She closed her eyes for a moment, taking in the warmth of the sun, the sound of the river gently rolling its way along and the chirp of a thrush calling from the trees.
It was a gorgeous spot with the stone bridge in one direction and the rolling South Downs National Park opposite. No doubt there was many a picture on social media with the hashtags #Ambleton #gorgeousview #beautiful #perfectspot. Neve couldn’t deny the beauty of the little village snuggled in the valley.
‘I thought that was you,’ came a voice behind her.
Neve jumped and spun round to see Jake coming towards her. She turned away again and wiped the tears from her face with her fingertips. ‘Just on my way home,’ she said, trying to muster up a light-hearted tone.
‘Neve? Are you OK?’
She felt his hand on her shoulder and she turned to face him.
‘I’m fine. Really.’ Even to her own ears she sounded anything but fine.
‘Really, you’re not,’ said Jake. He pulled her into him and stroked her hair.
The kindness of his touch, just being in his arms, was such a comfort. It took her by surprise and she allowed herself the luxury of his reassurance.
‘It’s been a bad day,’ she said eventually, pulling away from him.
‘Want to tell me about it?’
‘I won’t bore you with the details,’ she said. ‘There was an incident at the bus stop this morning with Poppy and some of the kids from the local school. I had to intervene.’
‘Is she OK?’
‘Yeah. She’s fine. It’s me who has gone to pieces.’
‘It’s amazing how much emotion children can evoke.’
‘You’d make a great dad,’ Neve found herself saying.
‘I can’t wait to have kids. I just need to find the right person to settle down with first. What about you? Do you want more kids?’
‘I do. Absolutely do,’ said Neve, looking out across the water. ‘Kit doesn’t, though.’
‘Ah, tricky that one.’
‘And before you ask, yes, we did talk about this before we got married. I just thought he’d change his mind eventually. I didn’t realise it was a for ever decision.’
She felt a tear slide its way down her cheek and she dashed it away. What was wrong with her? Crying like this? It wasn’t her style.
Again, Jake put his arms around her, resting his chin on her head. She could hear his heart thudding through his chest – a steady, reassuring beat. Neve lifted her head, her mouth stopping a hair’s breadth from Jake’s. He moved forward, kissing her. A small flutter of a kiss, as if testing the waters. Neve felt herself respond. He kissed her again, only this time longer and deeper. Neve gave a small whimper as her body curved to his and his broad hand slid down her spine.
‘I can make you happy,’ said Jake, breaking from kissing her, but still keeping her close. ‘We both want the same thing.’
Neve permitted herself to fantasise over his offer. She would be with someone who actually wanted a baby as much as she did. It would be her ultimate dream come true. She’d have to give up Kit and Poppy, of course. Was she prepared to do that?
It was a sobering thought and with it the bubble of desire burst. She pulled back from Jake and out of his arms.
‘Oh, Jake, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.’ She put her hand to her forehead. ‘I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking straight.’
He blew out a long breath, a resigned look on his face. ‘Don’t be sorry,’ he said. ‘I shouldn’t have come on to you like that.’
‘Let’s just forget that happened,’ said Neve, although she knew full well she wouldn’t be able to.
‘No, let’s not,’ said Jake.
‘What?’
‘I don’t want to forget that. Forgetting means it meant nothing. And whether or not it’s the right time, or if there will ever be a right time, it did mean something to me. It still does.’ He went to hold her hands but changed his mind. ‘Don’t dismiss this as nothing.’
Neve looked into Jake’s eyes which flamed with a passion that matched his words. The intensity startled her. He was right, it shouldn’t be dismissed as nothing but she also knew she couldn’t entertain the idea further. ‘I need to get home,’ was the only thing Neve could think to say, as she turned and broke into a jog across the meadow and out onto Copperthorne Lane, Willow trotting along beside her.
Neve checked her watch. Bugger! She had arranged with St Joseph’s that she would collect Poppy from school that day, so she could have a chat with the teacher about how the day had gone for Poppy, and whether there needed to be any extra support in light of the bus stop incident.
Neve just had time to drop Willow at home and jump in her car to get to the school for three o’clock.
Twenty minutes later, Neve was seated in the head’s office, with Poppy’s teacher sitting on the opposite seat.
‘Thank you for coming in, Mrs Masters,’ said Mrs Ogden, smiling at Neve. ‘We’ve kept a close eye on Poppy today and Miss Walker, the classroom assistant, has spoken to me as well.’
‘How has she been?’ asked Neve. She went to cross her legs and was horrified to notice her once-white Converse were now sporting a sludgy dried tide mark courtesy of the footpath around the meadow. Damn it. Neve tucked her legs under the chair instead.
‘On the whole Poppy has been fine,’ assured Mrs Ogden. ‘She’s engaged with