This place wasn’t on the map.
Wherever they came from, it didn’t matter, they hid themselves well, and started shooting. He couldn’t count all the casualties, he only knows that they are storming like crazy and destroying everything in front of them. When they finally tore through their defense, they found only three houses; probably a small village with some summer houses, existing in a better time, and now the last stronghold before the inevitable defeat. He hears his men shouting; something exploded, but he has no time to think. There could be a sniper in one of those houses, and these boys are not trained for that situation. He orders them to check the bunker, while he goes to look around.
The first house is empty. Only some food supplies that can be useful later. They haven’t had any food in two days, and they were running out of water. He made a mistake with the directions, but he couldn’t admit it to them. Doesn’t matter. As soon as they finish here, he’ll try to find the right direction. He went below the fence to the neighbors. The window is opened. He can hear the battle; he takes position and aims his gun directly toward the chaos —something he’s been so afraid of for a long time.
Darko’s pants were around his knees. A rifle next to him, and a gun in his hand. A woman is on the floor while he’s holding her hair and hitting her. He’s completely delirious. The puddle of blood is huge; teeth remain in her every time he lifts her head, so he’d put it down again with a sound of triumph. He’s kept his eyes fixed at the little girl with an animal look — the girl is curled up besides the oven, her eyes are wide open, watching this scene, terrified.
"Look, look!" he was shouting joyfully. "Look at your mom, motherfucker!"
"Stop! Darko, stop!"
"Look at your mom! Look!"
"Darko!"
He stops the entertainment, and their eyes meet. He only needed a second to know what he must do. The bullet misses his forehead, but hits his shoulder. There was no reaction on Darko’s face, as if he wasn’t surprised. Instead of firing at him, he fires at the little girl.
"Wait!"
He killed him with the next shot, but it was too late for the little girl. She remained sitting, quiet as she was. How did this monster manage to get to the house before him?
"Major…" A broken voice behind his back. "Major…"
Dugi was looking at him, with tears in his eyes.
"Darko snapped. I had to kill him."
"Major." The soldier was crying. He was looking at him incredulously. That was too much for him, just as long as others will keep up. Just a bit more, until he gets them to some place safe. After that, he will take care of bringing them back home safe and sound. They’ve seen too much war.
"Dugi, calm down. Darko went mad."
"Major."
"Tell me, Dugi"
"I’m the only one left."
The attacker fainted, quietly. The blood was leaking from his broken nose and it was dripping down his cheeks. It was fortunate that he didn’t have to punch him anymore.
Sandra, for God’s sake, where are you?
They only met once after he came back from the army. It was enough for her to realize how different he’s become from the man she followed to the convoy, which will separate them forever. He took a lot of stuff with him, and she was standing in front of his door, not as happy as she was before. Besides that, she was also faithful, and that is what hurt her the most.
“What did you expect? That I would die from happiness?“ he asked her.
He was still young then. He couldn’t predict how much he would need her. During that time, he still believed everything could be forgotten.
Why did he kill their love?
He asked himself this many times, but could never find the answer to ease his mind. His head was full of old memories, threatening with severe pain, but he almost smiled, finally able to see the firm decision to end this misery.
He knows he must find Sandra tonight.
Why doesn’t she have a cell phone?
She knows her own soul, knows her teenage temperament. Even though she wasn’t in her twenties anymore, there wasn’t a chance she’d miss Friday night. He just had to calmly think where he might find her for sure. He just has to think hard, and he’ll find her. When he turned the corner, he almost fell off the sidewalk, like in his previous interaction. A box full of flowers. An old woman got scared at first, and she started to scream.
“Flowers! Son, here’s a bouquet for one hundred dinars! This old woman doesn’t have much left.“
Why is she selling at this time? Poverty was breaking all limits. He didn’t know how much longer he could wander, so it was better to leave the bouquet for some other time. She was squinting her small eyes beneath her scarf, and while he was looking at them disgusted, he let the memories take over one more time…
“I will not take it!“
“Come on, you have to. You haven’t eaten for days. You’ll get your strength back.“
She reached out her scabby hand for him. She was so ugly that he felt his guts turning, making him want to throw up. He didn’t have anything to throw up though; he was completely empty. The old woman was holding a piece of meat. She cooked it yesterday, but he could still smell the burnt meat in the room. He was tied, and he couldn’t defend himself.
“Come on! Open your mouth! “
“Get away from me, you whore! I’ll kill you! “
She was giggling. Like in the horror movies, her mouth was full of rotten teeth, and he was trying to understand what happened.
He was wandering around with Dugi for days, until they buried all the dead soldiers. First they were thrilled for finding all the supplies, but all the food was rotten. Cans and packs without expiration date were full of rotten, disgusting things. They couldn’t find fresh water anywhere, but they didn’t worry about it much, since they could just gather some snow.
Knowing that he had no idea where they were was making it even worse. His mind, and everything that he learned during school were telling him one thing, but the reality was completely different. They were lost.
They were getting tired, especially Dugi. He started hallucinating that he was being haunted by those killed. The water they had gathered had a strange taste, as if the land were poisoned. After what seemed like an eternity of walking aimlessly around the circles, he finally woke up in a new place. He feared that they got trapped, and hoped that they were saved. But, that was quickly changed by one awful thought.
He was tied to the wooden table by dirty sheets. Dugi was on the table, and the oven was beside him. The old woman was at the oven. She laughed when she saw him wake, so she approached him and shoved a glass in his face, making him drink. He couldn’t stop looking at the soldier who had been ripped apart. He recognized his hand, his tattoo on his upper arm, and his uniform. She puts the pieces in a cauldron and laughs, satisfied.
“Eat, so I won’t have to kill you too. “
To show him she was serious, she broke his little finger. His circulation was weak because of the sheets he was tied with, but the pain ran through his whole body. He felt his heart beating like crazy; all he ever wanted was to make it stop. There was only one way. He chewed, then spit it out. More pain. He turned his head. Pain. In the end, he swallowed it.
“That’s it, my darling. Just keep on eating.“
Streets are full of young people: couples, singles, mostly drunk, who want to have a really good time, and be