“Yeah. But not because either of us lied. It just didn’t work out. I wasn’t the right man for her.”
She shook her head vehemently. “There is no right man. There are no heroes. Not for a man—or a woman.”
Alex didn’t shout at her. By the cut-and-dried code he lived by, a man never vented temper on a woman. His voice did sneak up another notch in volume, though, but that was necessary. Her whole cynical view...as if love weren’t the most powerful force in the universe, as if there were something inherently dishonest in the concept of romance...well, he simply had to tactfully address the errors in her thinking.
They were still fighting like cats and dogs when she startled them both with a yawn. A quick glance at his watch shocked him. The illuminated dial claimed it was 2:00 a.m. He shook the watch, just in case the battery had stopped, but no.
“For Pete’s sake, I’m really sorry. I know you have classes in the morning, and so do I. I just didn’t realize how late it was getting.”
He immediately stood up from the porch swing. So did Regan, with a chuckle. “I didn’t, either. In fact, it’s been a blue moon since I got so involved in a debate that I totally forgot the time. ... I’m glad you came for dinner, Alex.”
“Yeah, me, too. Thanks for the invitation.” It seemed natural to scoop up two of the kittens when she did and cart them back to their nesting box in the kitchen. Somehow she’d made him feel at home. Alex really didn’t understand iL He’d never had a problem finding a comfort level with a woman, but this was her. Regan. Who had his hormones in such an unfamiliar zinging uproar that he never imagined ever feeling relaxed around her.
Her house was tripping dark. Since neither of them had been inside all evening, no lights had been turned on. Just as he reached the front door, her hand reached out in the darkness to flip on the light switch in the hall. “I’ll put the outside porch light on, too,” she said with a chuckle. “I just still can’t believe how—”
Whatever she’d been planning to say faded into cyberspace. When her hand reached out, it connected with his chest. Alex had no doubt whatsoever that the contact was accidental. His body just happened to be between her and the light switch. She was just seeing him out. Nothing had happened through the whole evening to make him think anything else was conceivably on her mind. Or his.
But there was a sudden silence in the dark hall. And her soft, warm palm froze. As if it were glued in place against his heartbeat.
Three
He couldn’t be kissing her. Not Alex. Regan wasn’t prone to hallucinations, but she fully respected that everyone had a bonkers moment now and then. This simply had to be one of hers. All she’d done was walk him to the door. Reach out in the pitch-black hall to flip on a light switch. And, yeah, her hand had accidentally collided with his chest. But there had been a spare second when she felt his heart beating, beating against the nest of her palm.
It wasn’t as if a bomb had exploded. Or Congress had balanced the budget. Absolutely nothing monumental had happened to explain this sudden, strange break from reality she was suffering from.
So fast, so mystifyingly fast, his arms had swept around her. Regan could have handled an unwanted pass blindfolded in her sleep. But this was nothing like a pass. The accidental physical contact acted like tinder for a spark in a dry, dry forest.
His fingers sieved and then clenched in her hair. And suddenly his mouth was just there. Covering hers. Warm. Mobile. Evocatively and distinctly male.
She swayed against him because she would have lost her balance if she hadn’t. He wasn’t rough. She couldn’t even imagine Alex being rough. The texture of his mouth was as gentle as the disarming, winsome caress of a spring breeze...or it started out that way.
That first soft kiss deepened and darkened, scooping up momentum like the electric charge in a lightning storm. His lips sealed against hers with a pressure that made moonbeams dance under her closed eyes and the blood sluice through her veins in a giddy rush.
She wasn’t going to call it magic. She knew perfectly well that physical longing and a bunch of ragtag, amoral hormones could hoodwink a woman into believing silly, irresponsible things.
But this nonmagic thing he was doing was alluring and startling and terribly unsettling. One kiss whispered into another, chained into another and another. Alex was supposed to be a gentleman. Not an inspired kisser. She’d been so positive he was on the shy side, if not downright inhibited around women, but that illusion bit the dust, too. His tongue bribed hers into trying a taste. He tasted like mint juleps and need...a raw, urgent, honest need to touch and be touched, hold and be held. He treasured her mouth, exploring, tasting, sipping her responsiveness as if he’d never sampled this gold before, as if nothing were more important in the whole paltry universe but finding her.
Images of a strong, protective knight sweeping away his lady slinked into her mind. The fantasy images appalled her. The feeling scared her far worse. She was a feminist, for Pete’s sake. In her head she had no problem understanding that being swept away was unrealistic, irresponsible and outright stupid.
He loved his Gwen. She knew that, too. He was suffering from loss, and that urgent, explosive need wasn’t really about her. The loneliness and longing of heartache hurt like nothing else in life. He just needed someone at that moment.
Regan played all the appropriate warning songs in her mind.
She just couldn’t seem to stop her body from playing waltzes. Foolish, distracting waltzes. Her hands had somehow slipped around his waist. Her breasts crushed against his chest, her head pounding to the same wild rhythm as his, as if both of them already knew this music. His hips cradled hers, in harmony with every movement she made. He smelled like clean soap and man, pleasing, but neither scent explained this crazy feeling of drunk, dizzy intoxication.
Even as fear climbed through her system, she wanted more, not less. Even as rational thoughts tried to ground her, she didn’t want to be grounded. She wanted the sizzle. She wanted the wonder. She wanted to be touched by Alex, like she couldn’t remember ever wanting a man.
She could accept a moment of insanity. But something was wrong here. Really wrong. Her mind had already tabulated all the reasons why kissing him was bonkers and foolhardy, but there was something terrible going on besides that. As his tongue dove in her mouth again, as the rubbing pressure of his body speared desire through every nerve ending, she tasted risk. Threat. The power of something she was completely unfamiliar with. And it had his name.
“Regan...” She heard him groan against her mouth, saw something flash in his eyes in spite of the drowning darkness. But then he pulled back. Clenched his fingers around her shoulders as if to ensure that she was steady, and then abruptly dropped his hands and stepped away.
Regan scrabbled to recoup, not easy when she felt as shaky as a shipwreck. She could hear his breathing. And her own. Both of them were rasping as if they were mightily suffering from head colds.
Alex just stood there. He felt shock, she sensed. She understood—she’d never thought, even for a second, that he’d meant that embrace to happen. But he kept looking at her. His expression was blurred in the murky shadows, but she could see the black fire, the intensity, in his eyes.
She assumed he was suffering guilt, that all that pagan black fire must be about his Gwen. Not her. But silence stretched between them until the awkwardness was darn near paralyzing. She had to say something. “It’s all right,” was the best she could come up with.
“No. It isn’t.” Alex squeezed his eyes closed and took a long breath. She still wasn’t sure what he was thinking or feeling, but Alex being Alex, his gentleman side never disappeared for long. “Regan, I seriously apologize. I’m not sure I understand what just happened, but I swear I never meant to—”
“I know you didn’t. And we were having a good time, weren’t we? Just being friends. We just got sidetracked for a second there. Hey, you suffered