Tension tightened in Lucas’s stomach at John’s evasion of the word marriage. “Until the adoption is finalized. I hope things will move faster with the hurdles out of the way.”
“Even with private adoption, that could be a year or two,” John cautioned.
“I told her as much.” A year or two of living with Allie filled Lucas with an unexpected excitement. He paced across the porch, moving from one end of the house to the other.
John’s next statement brought him back to earth. “I assume you’ll want a pre-nup drawn up.”
A prenuptial agreement? Lucas hadn’t even considered that aspect. Something in him balked at the idea of asking Allie to sign a document protecting his assets. It seemed an insult to a woman who had been nothing but honorable as long as he’d known her. “Is that necessary?”
“I highly recommend it,” John said.
Lucas sighed. “How soon can you have it ready?”
“When’s the wedding?”
“Last weekend in September.”
“I’ll have it done by the end of next week.”
His mind working feverishly, Lucas re-crossed the porch. Beyond him, the gnarled branches of his vineyard glowed orange in the last of the setting sun, each vine heavy with grapes, Chardonnay and Zinfandel. He had so much, surely he could spare more than the twenty thousand he’d promised.
“I want to include a sizeable settlement for Allie.” Lucas named an amount, then immediately wondered if he should double it.
“You can’t be serious!” John protested. “Carol didn’t even get that much.”
“There wasn’t as much to give back then. Allie’s sacrificing one or more years of her life. It’s only fair.”
A thought niggled at him that it might have been fairest to simply loan her the money without the commitment of marriage. But he pushed it aside, determined to continue.
After he said his goodbyes to John, he considered calling Allie. He wanted to tell her about the pre-nup, about the additional compensation he was awarding her. He felt an urgency to cement the deal between them.
Pushing open the French doors leading back into the house, he strode to the kitchen cabinet where the phone books were kept. He could boot up his computer and get her home number from the company database, but this would be quicker. He’d found her number and was about to dial it when doubt lapped at him. Maybe he should leave her be tonight. He’d already dumped a mountain of turmoil in her lap, maybe she needed some breathing space.
He set down the phone on the counter and headed for the stairs, pausing only to grab his briefcase. But two hours later, he’d accomplished none of the tasks he’d brought home with him. He could think of nothing but Allie’s face, her lips, the taste and feel of her against his tongue. Just as he thrust aside one sensual image, another rose to take its place.
It was only lust, he told himself, and lust he could control. As long as those baser feelings didn’t give way to other, more intimate, more vulnerable emotions, he would be safe.
So, as he lay in his bed courting sleep, he allowed himself the harmless fantasies. When he finally slept, the eroticism followed him into his dreams. But as morning neared, the sensual haze parted and he saw only Allie’s face, her soft green eyes on him, her lips curved in a smile.
When he woke, he refused to acknowledge the inexplicable ache inside him. But it clung to him, nonetheless, as he dressed, ate a hurried breakfast, drove to TaylorMade headquarters. It eased only when he walked off the elevator and saw Allie waiting for him, a tentative smile on her face.
Chapter Three
Everything had changed, Allie realized as she watched Lucas stride toward her desk. Because of their agreement…because of their kiss. Telling him she’d had second thoughts, that she no longer intended to go through with the marriage wouldn’t bring things between them back the way they were before. In that one moment when his lips touched hers, the world had shuddered to a stop on its axis and had begun to spin an entirely different way.
He nodded at her as he passed, then waited at his door for her to follow. She wondered if he’d read her mind, had realized she wanted to talk to him. Then she remembered this was the way they started every morning, with his appointment book, going over his day.
As she picked up the laptop computer she stored all his engagements on, she mentally placed her declaration at the top of their to-do list. She had no intention of letting this slide as she had her request for a loan. They had to clear the air immediately.
She shut the door behind her, then crossed the room to set the computer in its usual place on his desk. As it powered up, she opened her mouth to speak.
He beat her to it. “I spoke to my attorney last night and this morning. There are a few details about the marriage we need to go over.”
No mention of their kiss, as if it had never happened. Lucas was back in control and Allie realized he could easily steamroller her if she let him.
She stood up straighter before him. “Lucas, I’ve had a change of heart. I can’t marry you after all.”
Not a flicker of reaction in his face. He just sat down and motioned her to do the same. “The facts haven’t changed, Allie. Your needs and mine dovetail. I’ve already arranged to have the funds you requested transferred. Just give me your account number.”
As she brought the visitor chair up to the desk opposite him, she tried to frame what she’d rehearsed late into the night. She lowered herself into her chair, sat perched on the edge. “I intend to explore other avenues for the loan.” What those would be she had no idea. “I’m sorry I can’t help you with your…situation, but marriage is out of the question.”
Resting his arms on his desk, he leaned toward her. “Why?”
It was barely a question, more a demand for information. Why? she asked herself. Why couldn’t she marry him? Last night at 2:00 a.m., her bedsheets tangled around her legs from her restlessness, she’d had the answers. Now it seemed none of them would hold up to his scrutiny.
“Because we hardly know one another.” She groped for the words. “Because marriage…” Because marriage is far too intimate a relationship. Because it would force a false closeness on us neither one wants.
Because you kissed me.
“Allie.” He said her name so softly, almost tenderly, bringing her attention to him. His steel-gray gaze fixed on her face, his expression intent. “What I did last night…it was a mistake. A ridiculous mistake. I won’t repeat it. I promised you a platonic relationship. You have no reason to fear I’ll overstep those bounds again.”
Under his scrutiny, she could barely bring two thoughts together. “Even still, Lucas—”
“Please reconsider, Allie.”
Every ounce of self-preservation within her screamed no. His promise didn’t change the thread of attraction stretching between them, her secret yearning that Lucas would do exactly what he’d just vowed he would not.
And yet… She studied his face, the impenetrable mask he wore. His eyes were guarded, giving nothing away. But when her gaze dropped to his hands on his desk, her impressions shifted. He’d clenched his fingers together, all the tension in his body centered on the tendons and bones of his hands.
What could be going on inside him that made control so imperative? She’d always seen him as arrogant, autocratic. In the two years she’d worked for him, she’d had to struggle constantly to hold her own, to stand her ground. Marrying him would make that battle ten times worse.
And yet… His gaze met hers unflinchingly as the grip of his hands tightened. Suddenly, her heart ached for him. And she knew, despite