For the last six months, Kelly had been fending off well-intentioned matchmaking by her family and friends, urging her to go out on a date and have fun, because Simon wouldn’t have wanted her to be on her own for the rest of her life; he would have wanted her to be loved. She knew that; just as, if she’d been the one to die, she would have wanted Simon to find someone to share his life with and love him as much as she had.
But she just wasn’t ready to move on. She couldn’t forgive herself for not picking up on his HCM. She was a cardiologist; she’d treated quite a few people with Simon’s condition and she knew all the symptoms. There must have been something she’d missed. Something she should have spotted. She’d let the love of her life down in the worst possible way. And she wasn’t going to let any of her patients down.
She blew out a breath. And it was ridiculous to let Luciano Bianchi throw her. Absolutely nothing could happen between them. OK, so he seemed to be dedicated to his career; but even though he didn’t have the lifestyle of a ruler-to-be, that was exactly what he was. The heir to the kingdom of Bordimiglia. No way would he be allowed to get involved with anyone who didn’t have a single drop of blue blood in her veins. He’d end up marrying a princess for dynastic reasons. His relationship with her was strictly business. And that little throb of awareness when his skin had touched hers—well, she was just going to ignore it.
She managed to focus on her patients for that morning’s clinic; and Luc’s clinic clearly ran on time as he was waiting for her in the reception area at one o’clock.
‘Hi. How was your first morning?’ she asked brightly.
‘Fine, thanks. We have a good team,’ he said with a smile.
A smile that shouldn’t have made her feel as if her heart had just done a backflip. She pulled herself back under control. Just.
‘How was your morning?’ he asked.
‘Good, thanks,’ she said. ‘It was mainly follow-up appointments today, and it’s always lovely to see your patients gaining in confidence, once they’ve had time to come to terms with their diagnosis and started to make the lifestyle changes that will help them.’
‘I know what you mean.’ He smiled. ‘We held a yearly party for the heart transplant and bypass patients at the Royal Hampstead Free. It was great to see them all dancing and making the most of the time they didn’t think they would get with their families.’
‘That’s such a nice idea,’ she said. ‘Maybe Sanjay will let us set up something like that here.’ She walked with him to the canteen. ‘It’s your first day, so this is my shout—and don’t argue, because it’s a departmental tradition.’
‘As long as I get to take the next new recruit under my wing and pay that forward,’ he said.
‘Deal.’ She grinned. ‘I think you’re going to fit right into the team, Luc.’
He nodded, looking hopeful.
‘The food is all pretty good here, and the coffee is decent,’ she added.
They’d just sat down to eat their sandwiches when Kelly’s phone pinged to signal an incoming text.
‘Sorry to be rude,’ she said, ‘but do you mind if I check my messages? It’s probably my sister Susie—she’s due her twenty-week antenatal scan today.’
‘And you should have been meeting her for lunch instead of babysitting me?’ Luc asked.
She smiled. ‘No, she’s being seen in a different hospital. Even if we’d arranged to meet halfway, I would only have had time to say hello and give her a hug before I had to rush back here for clinic.’
‘Then go ahead and read your message,’ he said. ‘You’re not being rude. If it was one of my sisters in that situation, I’d want to know how the scan went, too.’
‘It’s probably just a round robin telling everyone it’s fine, or she would have phoned instead of messaging me,’ Kelly said. But she checked her phone anyway, then grinned. ‘Yup. All’s well, and she and Nick decided not to find out whether it’s a boy or girl.’
‘Is it her first baby?’
‘Her third—she already has twin boys.’
‘Twins run in your family, then?’ he asked.
She shook her head. ‘On Nick’s side—her husband. Oscar and Jacob have just turned five, and I think she’s hoping for a girl this time so she gets to do ballet as well as football. Do you mind if I just send her a quick reply?’
‘Of course not.’
She tapped in Great news, love you. X—and then her phone pinged to signal another message from Susie. Kelly didn’t bother reading beyond the first line because she knew exactly what her sister had in mind.
‘Answer that as well, if you need to,’ he said.
‘It can wait.’ Kelly grimaced. ‘I love my sister dearly, but I swear since she’s been pregnant...’
‘Older sister bossing you about?’ he guessed.
‘Trying to.’ She sighed. ‘Actually, you might as well hear it from me, than from someone else in the department who means well. My husband died two years ago, at the age of thirty. He was cycling to work when he had a cardiac arrest. The paramedics couldn’t save him, and the coroner’s report said he had HCM. It was a complete shock because he’d had no symptoms whatsoever.’
‘But, as a cardiologist, you think you must’ve missed something?’ Luc guessed.
Kelly swallowed hard. ‘I’ve been over and over it in my head, trying to see what I missed, and he really didn’t have any symptoms. His dad died young from a heart attack, but his dad had a high-stress job, plus he smoked and drank too much; everyone assumed his heart attack was because of all that and they didn’t bother doing a post-mortem. I guess because of what happened to his dad, Simon was more aware of heart health than the average person, even before he met me. He didn’t smoke, he drank in moderation, he ate sensibly, he cycled to work and exercised regularly. He did everything right.’
Yet still he’d died. And how she missed him. Why, why, why hadn’t she joined the dots together and made him go for that all-important check-up that would’ve spotted his unusual heart rhythm? Why hadn’t she made the connection about his father? Why hadn’t she thought there might be more to his father’s heart attack than his lifestyle?
‘My sister, my mum and my friends have all decided that I’ve been on my own for long enough and they’re forever trying to fix me up with a suitable potential partner,’ she continued. ‘That’s why Susie’s asking me to go over to dinner tonight. She says it’s so she can show me the scan pictures, but I know she’ll also have invited someone that she thinks is perfect for me.’
‘And you’re not ready?’
‘I’m not ready,’ she confirmed. ‘I know they all mean well, but it drives me crazy and I can’t seem to get them to back off. I loved Simon and I know he wouldn’t have wanted me to be alone, but...’ She sighed. ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to dump all that on you. What I was really going to ask was if the rumours are true about you running a trial for HCM patients, and if so whether you were looking for people to join the trial?’
‘Because you have a patient who might be suitable?’
She wrinkled her nose. ‘Not my patient, but I do know two people. Simon’s younger brother Jake, and his daughter Summer—she’s four.