But Jack was in Chicago, and she was here, alone. So incredibly alone.
Unbidden, tears sprang to her eyes. She blinked fiercely, determined not to yield to the array of emotions overwhelming her. Shannon had always accused her of being too emotional. Natalie couldn’t deny it was true. Nor could she deny that following her heart had only led to misery. But she’d learned her lesson, and if she couldn’t always control her feelings, at least she’d learned to harness them. She wasn’t going to yield to them now.
Despite this assertion, a single tear slipped free, tracked slowly down her cheek. She brushed it away impatiently.
“Natalie?”
She started. His voice was close, too close, behind her. More startling than his proximity was the realization that this was the first time he’d ever spoken her name. And in that low husky tone, the single word sounded incredibly intimate.
Then he touched her. Just a hand on her shoulder, but the simple gesture of comfort completely obliterated her defenses.
“I didn’t mean to come down on you so hard,” he said gruffly.
She just shrugged, her throat too tight to speak.
“I’m trying to say I’m sorry.”
She nodded.
Dissatisfied with this nonverbal response, he settled both his hands on her shoulders and turned her around to face him. She was too close to the edge, too close to losing the control she prized so highly, so she kept her head averted, the fall of hair curtaining her face.
It was a mistake to believe he’d respect such a physical barrier. If she’d learned anything about Lieutenant Creighton in the past couple of days, it was that he could be relentless. She’d forgotten that he could also be considerate, as when he’d taken her for breakfast rather than sending her away from the murder scene alone. And when he’d come to her defense against Randolph Hawkins.
He was both relentless and gentle now, the finger under her chin forcing her head up, the eyes that met hers filled with compassion. “I am sorry.”
Two more tears slid down her cheeks. Very gently, he brushed them away. Natalie blinked, startled by the tenderness of the gesture, alarmed by the undeniable urge to lean into him, to seek shelter in his strength. She didn’t want or need his comfort. She didn’t need anything from any man.
But she couldn’t pull away. The intensity of his gaze held her immobile. She’d never seen eyes so dark, so warm, so achingly blue. He took a step closer. Their bodies weren’t quite touching, but she could feel the heat emanating from him and the awareness that crackled in the air between them.
As impossible as it seemed, his eyes grew even darker. She recognized his desire, it was echoed in her own heart. But she couldn’t acknowledge it, couldn’t respond to it. Giving in to the inexplicable attraction she felt for this man would be more dangerous than walking into the electrical storm outside with a lightning rod.
But the logic of her mind was silenced by the yearning of her heart. When his gaze dropped to her mouth, her lips tingled with wanting. He tilted his head toward her, and she felt her blood pulse slow and heavy through her veins. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. She could only want. And she desperately wanted his kiss.
The sudden and unexpected crack outside the window made her jump. It also snapped the thread of tension that seemed to have woven around the lieutenant and herself, allowing her to breathe once again and to fully appreciate the recklessness of what she’d almost allowed to happen.
“It’s just thunder,” he said soothingly, reaching for her again.
The reasonableness of his tone infuriated her almost as much as the childishness of her own reaction. “I know it’s just thunder,” she snapped back. “I just don’t like storms very much.”
She turned away and wrenched the curtains across the window. If only she could shut away her emotions as easily.
At least the booming intrusion had reminded her of the situation, of her need for self-preservation. She didn’t want to let this cop get close, to resurrect feelings she’d long since buried. Creighton, however, didn’t appear to be giving her any choice in the matter. That realization, more than anything else, fortified her defenses. She wasn’t going to be any man’s pawn.
“I wasn’t making fun of you, Natalie.” His tone was still patient, understanding. “Everyone has fears.”
“Forget it,” she said stiffly. “I’m not usually this thin-skinned—it’s just been a rough couple of days.”
“I’d say that’s an understatement.”
She shrugged again. “I’ll feel better after a good night’s sleep.”
“Maybe,” he acknowledged. “But I don’t think you’ll get it here.”
She frowned. “Why not?”
“Because whoever placed that phone call knows you’re here,” Dylan reminded her.
“You said the call was made from the lobby. Whoever called was in the hotel, not in my room.”
“If he got that far, it’s not a stretch to think he could go farther.”
“This is a reputable hotel with good security. If someone is determined to find me, I don’t see how I’ll be safer anywhere else.”
“You could register at another hotel under a false name.”
“I’m not going into hiding.”
“You could be in danger, Natalie.”
He was doing it again—using her given name, implying a camaraderie she didn’t want, wasn’t willing to acknowledge. “Make up your mind, Lieutenant. One minute you’re practically accusing me of working with the bad guys—the next, you’re suggesting I’m their target.”
“I know you’re not involved—” He broke off abruptly. “Dammit, I don’t know you’re not involved. I don’t know you, or anything about you. And I’ve been a cop long enough to know that prematurely ruling out any possibility is dangerous.”
Well, that clearly set the battle lines again. She felt an uncomfortable sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach, a sense of loss she didn’t understand.
Creighton drew a deep breath, raked a hand through his already unruly hair. “But I don’t believe you’re involved. I saw you in Merrick’s apartment. I know how that scene affected you. You wouldn’t have reacted that way if you’d had any part in making it happen.”
She didn’t know why his statement filled her with such relief. It shouldn’t matter to her what he thought, but for some inexplicable reason it did. Determined to ignore her internal response, she tried a wry smile. “Then I should be grateful I have a weak stomach?”
“You should be cautious.”
“I am,” she told him. “And right now I’m tired. Can we table this conversation to a later date so I can get some sleep tonight?”
He hesitated, as if he intended to pursue the topic further, but then he nodded. “All right.” He took a business card out of his pocket and held it toward her.
“You already gave me one,” she reminded him.
“This one has my home number on it. If you can’t get me on my cell, try me there.”
“I don’t think—”
“Use it,” he said, placing the card in her hand. “Anytime.”
But Natalie wouldn’t call, and