Then a horse whinnied and attempted to thrust its head between them. Instantly Mackillin released her and his expression was so thunderous that Cicely was shocked and hastily turned away from him and went to her own horse, fumbling at the beast’s accoutrements with shaking hands. She dragged herself up into the saddle. Did he blame her for what had just happened between them? What was happening to her? What were these unfamiliar urges she felt towards him? It had been such fun and satisfying when they had worked together to free him from the snowdrift. If only she and Diccon could share such moments of being in harmony. She needed Mackillin to go far away so that she could concentrate her thoughts on praying for Diccon’s return. She needed inner peace instead of the tumultuous feelings that gripped her now. She must hold steadfast to her decision to keep her distance from Mackillin for the remainder of his stay at Milburn Manor.
‘We must go back.’ The harshness in his voice was enough to make her school her features before looking at him.
‘It would be foolish to continue,’ she said, sensing the tension in him as he held himself erect in the saddle.
He clenched his jaw and dug his heels into his horse’s flanks. There were words he would have liked to say to her, but it would indeed be folly to speak them. He was shocked that a kiss he had intended as part of the fun they had shared had turned into something far deeper. What did he think he was playing at? He had made up his mind to marry Mary Armstrong, knowing it was sensible. He did not expect to reach the heights in his alliance with her, knowing that the love that the poets and minstrels raved about scarcely existed between man and wife. Yet just now he had felt such an explosion of feeling inside him that a certain part of his body still throbbed with arousal. He could not help wondering whether Cicely was attracted to him, as he was to her, against her better judgement. He certainly could not allow it to interfere with his plans. After years of travelling and adventure it was time to settle down and raise a family. For that he needed allies to make his position more secure. For the remainder of his stay he would make sure not to be alone with Cicely.
Having made their decisions, both prayed that God would be kind to them and send a thaw.
Chapter Four
The sound of rushing water swirling round rocks filled Cicely’s ears. Standing on a boulder, she watched a vole struggle towards the opposite bank of the river and saw a similarity in its plight to her own. For she, too, felt that she was trying to reach firm ground again because the world that she thought secure had collapsed with the death of her father and the news that their northern kin were a threat to her and the twins’ safety.
‘What will you do, Mackillin?’ Jack’s voice drew her attention away from her thoughts and the tiny creature’s plight. ‘The water level is dangerously high. Will you delay your departure until Matt returns? He’ll be able to tell you the state of the rivers and bridges on the road to York and perhaps Kingston-on-Hull, too.’
Cicely gazed towards where her brother and the Scots lord were inspecting the bridge and held her breath as she waited for Mackillin’s reply. Since she had first heard the rain two nights ago, differing emotions had warred inside her. Now she told herself, not for the first time, that she must put him out of her mind and concentrate on getting in touch with Diccon.
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