Amy closed the door as Helena went on her way. She couldn’t think of anything she wanted to do less than have a private conversation with Nico but what choice did she have? Knowing him, he wouldn’t give up and go away if she failed to appear. No, he would be far more likely to come to her room and that was something she wanted to avoid. The last thing she needed was Jacob overhearing their conversation.
Gathering up her clothes, she hurriedly dressed, opting for a cotton dress in a delicate shade of green which she knew suited her. A slick of coral lipstick and a flick of mascara helped to relieve the pallor that had invaded her skin. Her hair was still wet from the shower but she didn’t have time to dry it so she brushed it back from her face and secured it at the nape of her neck with a silver clip. Maybe it was silly to make such an effort with her appearance, but she needed to feel that she was in control of herself, especially as she had a feeling that she was going to need every scrap of control she could muster when she faced Nico.
‘I just need to have a word with someone,’ she told Jacob, slipping her feet into a pair of tan leather sandals. The heels weren’t all that high but they did add an extra inch or two to her height and that would help. Nico was over six feet tall and she hated the thought of him towering over her, although at one time she had loved the way he had made her feel so small and feminine—
‘I’ll be in the sitting room if you want me.’ Amy blanked out that thought, knowing how foolish it was. The last thing she needed at this moment was to start harking back to the past. ‘I shan’t be long so you’re to stay here until I get back. Understand?’
‘Uh-huh.’ Jacob barely glanced at her, too absorbed in his game to worry about her absence.
Amy wasn’t happy about leaving him on his own, however. As she made her way to the sitting room, she decided to make it clear to Nico that she had no intention of getting into a protracted discussion. Whatever he had come to say would need to be said as quickly as possible. Taking a deep breath, she pushed open the door. Nico was standing by the window and he turned when he heard her enter the room. He had his back to the light, making it impossible to discern his expression. She felt at an immediate disadvantage and decided to take the impetus from him in the hope that it might help to ease the situation.
‘Helena said that you wanted to speak to me.’ She gave a little shrug, as though the request didn’t worry her although it did. ‘I don’t mean to be rude but I’ve left Jacob on his own, so can we keep it brief?’
‘Of course.’ He inclined his head although his eyes never left her face, she noticed. ‘It’s quite simple. I just have one question I would like you to answer: Is Jacob my son?’
A DOZEN ANSWERS flew through her head but Amy knew in her heart that only one would satisfy him. What was the point of dragging this out by lying when Nico already suspected the truth?
‘Yes.’
His eyes closed for the briefest of moments before he started walking towards her. Amy stepped aside, unsure what was about to happen, but he merely opened the door and left without uttering another word. Amy sank down onto a chair as all the strength drained from her limbs. Was that it? Now that Nico had his answer, was he not going to pursue the matter any further? Didn’t he care that he had a son, or at least not enough to ask her any more questions?
Tears filled her eyes, tears of disappointment for Jacob, tears of disillusionment for herself. Quite frankly, she couldn’t remember feeling so let down, not even when Nico had reacted with such a sad lack of emotion when she had miscarried Jacob’s twin. It made her see that any hopes she may have harboured about Nico wanting to get to know Jacob had been a waste of time. Nico wasn’t interested in Jacob any more now than he had been interested in him nine years ago.
* * *
Nico sat in his car and stared across the shimmering blue expanse of the sea. He couldn’t actually see it. All he could see was this greyness that seemed to have enveloped him. It felt as though it had leaked out from his very soul and consumed him.
He had a son. It should have been a time to take stock, to reassess his life and make plans for the future, but he couldn’t see through the greyness. He had a son who he had known nothing about, a child who had grown up knowing nothing about him either. He didn’t doubt for a moment that Amy had kept him a secret from Jacob just as she had kept Jacob a secret from him, but why? It was a question he should have asked her, one of many that needed answering, but he couldn’t face it. Not now, not when everything felt so grey and hopeless.
His hands shook as he started the engine and drove away from the hotel. It was late afternoon and the roads were busy with locals and tourists heading back to begin their preparations for the evening. Nico took his time, aware that his concentration wasn’t what it should have been. It took him almost an hour to get home but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered apart from that answer Amy had given him, that tiny life-changing word: Yes.
The first stab of feeling pierced his heart and he winced. He got out of the car and watched as the sun sank below the horizon. He could see the colours now, see the gold turn to orange, see it begin to fade to a rusty red. He had no idea how long he must have stood there but there was the barest glow shimmering along the horizon when he finally roused himself. He went inside and took a bottle of water out of the fridge, gulping it down as though he had just returned from the desert. In a way, he had. He had escaped from that grey wasteland and now he needed those answers, all of them, no matter how unpalatable they might turn out to be.
Tossing the empty bottle into the bin, he went back to his car. This wasn’t over, not by any means. Amy had a lot of explaining to do.
* * *
Jacob’s eyelids were drooping by the time they had finished dinner. Although he put up a token resistance when Amy took him back to their room, she could tell that he was merely going through the motions. He fell asleep before she got to the end of the chapter in the book they were reading. Switching off the bedside lamp, she let herself out onto the terrace. They had a ground floor room overlooking the garden and it was peaceful out there with just the sound of the waves rolling up the beach to disturb the silence.
Sitting down on one of the wicker chairs, she let the peace wash over her, hoping it would calm her, but her nerves were too tightly strung. She didn’t know when Nico would seek her out again but he would. Even if he didn’t want anything to do with Jacob, he would want to make his position clear, make sure she understood exactly what she could expect from him. That was his way. He took control, made decisions, and didn’t confer with anyone. However, it wasn’t that simple in this instance. What Nico decided wouldn’t affect only him but Jacob as well. She had come to Constantis specifically to give Jacob a link to his paternal heritage. Even though she had never expected to run into Nico, it had happened and now she needed to protect Jacob at all costs. She couldn’t bear to imagine how hurt he would be if he found out who Nico was and then learned that his father had rejected him.
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